The Jersey - Comments

I read a lot of sports fics, it's one of my favourite tropes, though they're usually au's from non-sports related fandoms. So when this came up I was super excited, and I was not disappointed. Very well written and I thoroughly enjoyed it, pretty hot and really cute at the same time! Well done.

I actually don't know anything/don't follow hockey - but this was a cute one-shot. The paragraphs were a bit blocky and could have been spaced out, but aside from that it kept me interested for it's length. The characters also had their own personality and weren't just vessels for the fic, which was nice!

Comment swap sent me here to this lovely little gem. And admittedly, I know nothing about hockey. But it's refreshing to read something that isn't a fan piece about One Direction or some other lame shit. This was very well written and the writong flows greatly. The detail is just right without boring the reader. Good job, doll.

Okay so I got sent here from comment Swap. Must say I do not know a lot about the Flyers, I'm a huge Blackhawk's fan (try not to kill me for that) and Hockey is one of my favorite sports, the plot was good though a tiny bit jumpy in some places. Like you shifted from one thing to another quite quickly, which in a face paced 'action' scene I can see, but for the scene you were writing, not jumping around so much would have been good too. Over all the chapter is interesting, I don't know enough about the Flyers to understand much of what you were writing, but I did enjoy the chapter. All in all the main character seemed to be just a tiny bit too perfect, though that could just be me, I liked the way she did seem a little nervous about wearing the jersey in the beginning though I wasn’t a hundred percent sure why she felt that way. Either way the chapter was good and I’m sure in the future I’ll be back to check up on this story :) the layout was good and didn’t distract from the words written on the page either, which is a big plus. If I can’t read it, I won’t be back, but you made it legible and it was well written.

I was sent here from Comment Swap

I have no idea who this is about and I thought you sentence structure was a bit off. But, you have a great thing going on here, I thought your plot was good though and you are a good writer.

Keep writing and good luck

Comment swap! Finally a story I know something about, lol. The fact that you wrote this because you got a jersey in the mail makes me laugh in a good way. That's totally something I'd do! I didn't really catch any grammar errors but you may want to watch out for your sentence structure. I noticed in the beginning that many of them were short and could have been extended to add some depth to your description. Also I think explaining who the three C's are and Stella's relationship to them would be a great addition. All in all, though, this is well written and I think you did a great job :)

I loved the idea behind the story. Your quick character development and attention to details made this phenomenal. I really loved this story, and I am very glad comment swap brought me to it. Your writing style is very unique and I really loved reading what you wrote! Keep writing, you're amazing!

[comment swap] I'm no hockey fan, but I might be after this story! It had a fun perspective, and I was pretty interested in the game play, something I don't ever say. I'm probably the least sporty person alive. This story was great, keep up the good work!

To be honest, I never would have read this if it weren't for comment swap, but I'm really glad I did! The story was very sweet and I really enjoyed it! Too bad it's only a one shot, I'd like to read more!

via comment swap. ;D

It was definitely a good read. The only thing I'd worry about is that you had a little bit of a problem in the beginning with your sentences being very abrupt. It was like that thing where there's a paragraph and it starts out with each sentence having five words, and it says it's getting very repetitive, but then it launches into 10-to-12 word sentences of varying tone and length and so on and it sounds like music. That was what it reminded me of. Your sentences get much better and varied as the story goes on and I think that might be because you were getting more into it. I may be wrong, but that's what I'm thinking, because the story after the abrupt sentences was fantastic.

I don't watch hockey either but you did a good job of making it not such a big deal. You didn't use confusing terms or anything, and I could follow what was going on. And unfff, I have always been one for dirty talk and sex scenes like you were segueing into, hehe. I'm also one for anticlimaxes, but that's a personal preference, so I wouldn't worry at all about how your story ended. It was very sweet. <333

To be honest I really didn't think I'd enjoy this but I really did. I barely ever subscribe to comment swap stories for some reason, but this I enjoyed. I found myself wanted to read more, please please update soon! No pressure! Haha.

Hey, I'm from comment swap :-)
I'm from Ireland, so even though I play hockey myself, I have no idea who these characters are. Despite that, the story was still quite enjoyable. Stella and Claude's characters are developing well so far and the plot is flowing nicely. Your grammar and spelling are almost perfect. Well done!