Taste This Breath. - Comments

First off the pictures are a bit much and sort of distracting. Second, there was a few repeated words after another.

The story itself is quite good though. The emotions are strong and well felt. However the text is quite big, but layout is fine. I really like your ability to describe the characters emotions. You did a really nice job on this story. It is not really the type of story I like to enjoy but it is good and I'm sure there are a lot of readers that do love this type of story and would absolutely love this.

comment swap .... sorry but this story is not good it is very good.... amazing details, love the title and the pic for chapter 1!!! comment swap has done something very amazing, it told me to comment on this story. but this story is just so good that I have read it many times... again and again.. many girls think that guys don't like them because they are fat and ugly but the thing that really matters is what is inside of you, right???

amazing work!!! keep up the good work.. I am gonna read more stories by this author and I recommend this story....

AWWESSSSOMME!!!!!!
LOVE ROMANTIC STORIES!!! YOU HAVE JUST MADE MY DAY!! I BET YOU WILL MAKE OTHER PEOPLE'S DAY AS WELL!!

ya , about the layout... the letters are a bit big you know.... please change them

anyways good overall!!!!!!!!!

comment swap .... sorry but this story is not good it is very good.... amazing details, love the title and the pic for chapter 1!!! comment swap has done something very amazing, it told me to comment on this story. but this story is just so good that I have read it many times... again and again.. many girls think that guys don't like them because they are fat and ugly but the thing that really matters is what is inside of you, right???

amazing work!!! keep up the good work.. I am gonna read more stories by this author and I recommend this story....

AWWESSSSOMME!!!!!!
LOVE ROMANTIC STORIES!!! YOU HAVE JUST MADE MY DAY!! I BET YOU WILL MAKE OTHER PEOPLE'S DAY AS WELL!!

ya , about the layout... the letters are a bit big you know.... please change them

anyways good overall!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I was sent here by comment swap! Um, about your layout...I would make the words a teeency bit smaller; but that's just my opinion. I thought they were a bit big when I got to the first chapter. And...sorry, but this isn't really my type of story, after just reading the first chapter. You wrote it pretty well, but I tend to be picky when it comes to stories. I usually read fantasy and never really anything super romancy or like this. But, that's just me. You have a good thing going on, and I wish you the best of luck in continuing it and getting more readers and comments from people who love it!

Comment swap time! So, this isn't my usual kind of story, but that's not so bad. Different is good, right? The only pointers I really have for this story is about grammar and spacing. Paragraphs should be spaced out and the dialogue should have a comma before the last quotation mark if it's a regular sentence instead of a question or an exclamation. But besides that this is pretty interesting and I hope you have fun writing this!

Sorry, again. It's stuck.

Sorry, I know I've already commented but comment swap has got me stuck here. This is great (again) by the way!

Comment Swap! Oh hey there. First of all, I really like the layout, it's smooth and simple yet beautiful. I don't usually like this type of stories, I feel like it's too much. I really love the way you write, your words flow and I have this feeling like it came from the heart. The one thing that was sort of a turn off for me was that .gif on chapter 1, it looked... Idk, not serious, I feel like you took it from an emo tumblr or something, don't get me wrong. Like Alexander said, you should have your paragraphs more spaced out. Other than that, I enjoyed this a lot. Recommended!

This is really emotional. I felt like crying through half of it. It's powerful and your writing is stunning! Good luck with writing the rest!

From Comment Swap~

Truthfully, I don’t read stories like these very often because I find them triggering, especially when the stories have to do with self-harm and eating disorders. However, what you have so far is really wonderful. This was incredibly emotional and I felt myself choking up as I read this, because it was simply so tragic that this character feels that the only way she’ll be loved is to be thin. It’s just so sad. :( The only constructive criticism that I have is that your dialogue and some of the descriptions are mushed together. I suggest separating them because it’ll make them easier to read.

Awesome job with this so far (: <3

Here from comment swap.

This is definitely emotional, which is something i like to see in a story. You have a good writing style, has a lot of potential. I would recommend maybe cleaning up the layout, along with the paragraphs, possibly separate the dialogue a bit, but if it's meant to be like that then that's alright.

Keep it up!
:)

Hello there. I like how this is written. Your emotions flow into the story and your writing style pulled me riht in. The conversation through the phone is realistic and I like that. Even her thoughts were honest and straight forward. I wonder how her character will develop if you keep on writing this. Well done. You did a pretty good job. Xd