I'm here judging the entries for the quotes contest!
Content
I like how sweet this is, especially at the end. It's interesting to take the stance of someone with a lot of money because in so many stories, I've seen the rich kid portrayed as this mindless bitchy character who wouldn't socialise with the lower classes if their lives depended on it, so it was really refreshing to read from Anastasia's view - a view that shows that even though she's from what many people would consider a privileged background, she still has her problems and issues to deal with. I'm probably reading into it too much, but when I read this, I get the essence that one of the hidden morals is that you could have all of the money in the world and still be miserable, but if you give it all away for something as precious and fleeting as love, it can really pay off. I love that your story has this really strong idea of that running throughout and it's just really interesting that it comes from someone with money who did give it all away to be with that one guy. It makes everything she's said seem so much more heartfelt and truthful and I'm glad that she didn't listen to her parents in the end. It's nice to see things work out for the better at the end.
Concrit
I recall you mentioning in the author's note that you typed this out on your phone so good job on the writing for not having any form of writing software! I'd have messed up big time. I noticed one or two quick things that I thought I'd point out for you though:
- to last me ten life times - life times reads better as lifetimes - He was a skater boy who smoke cigarettes - smoke should be smoked - he didn't deserve to be in their presents - presents should be presence - Yeah, and I don't regret it I feel free - I think there should be a period between it and I here, but I'm not too sure.
Overall
This was super-sweet, really well written and interesting all mixed into one. Lovely job!
Content
I like how sweet this is, especially at the end. It's interesting to take the stance of someone with a lot of money because in so many stories, I've seen the rich kid portrayed as this mindless bitchy character who wouldn't socialise with the lower classes if their lives depended on it, so it was really refreshing to read from Anastasia's view - a view that shows that even though she's from what many people would consider a privileged background, she still has her problems and issues to deal with. I'm probably reading into it too much, but when I read this, I get the essence that one of the hidden morals is that you could have all of the money in the world and still be miserable, but if you give it all away for something as precious and fleeting as love, it can really pay off. I love that your story has this really strong idea of that running throughout and it's just really interesting that it comes from someone with money who did give it all away to be with that one guy. It makes everything she's said seem so much more heartfelt and truthful and I'm glad that she didn't listen to her parents in the end. It's nice to see things work out for the better at the end.
Concrit
I recall you mentioning in the author's note that you typed this out on your phone so good job on the writing for not having any form of writing software! I'd have messed up big time. I noticed one or two quick things that I thought I'd point out for you though:
- to last me ten life times - life times reads better as lifetimes
- He was a skater boy who smoke cigarettes - smoke should be smoked
- he didn't deserve to be in their presents - presents should be presence
- Yeah, and I don't regret it I feel free - I think there should be a period between it and I here, but I'm not too sure.
Overall
This was super-sweet, really well written and interesting all mixed into one. Lovely job!