Wonderlandian History - Comments

  • bona drag.

    bona drag. (935)

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    I quite liked this this story a lot. It was rather clever and a unique addition to the Wonderland fandom. I loved how you wrote it like a historical essay and treated it all as fact, including dates and house names. I really enjoyed the formal terms you used like autocratic and totalitarian as well to add to the feel of this being a legitimate scholarly piece.

    The word betrothed is used throughout the story in reference to, I believe, decapitation and I think you were looking for a different word. Betroth means like an engagement. If you're betrothed to someone, you've agreed to marry them. I definitely don't think you meant that the Queen of White entered into a marriage agreement with her second cousin.

    …rising to what it's considered the second part of the Red Ages.

    I do believe it's in this sentence should just be is.

    I really liked how different this story was and the way in which you wrote it really enhanced the feeling of it being factual. I also liked that as formal as it was, there was a distinct oddity to it that made it very Wonderlandian. It was very amusing to read and the history of the monarchy was described very well.
    June 10th, 2013 at 01:08am