Crossroads - Comments

This was so gorgeous. It's written so poetically and wonderfully, but it's also sad and bittersweet at the same time. Gah, so amazing.

I really like how much emotion is in the piece, without you describing it or feeling like it was forced through the words. It was also incredibly realistic, and I know lots of people would be able to relate to it.

The line at the very beginning, and then the one that's just a slight variation of it at the end were my favorite. They really struck a cord with me, but the entire story was just as amazing.

Good job

This was entirely too beautiful that I'm actually stumbling trying to put words together for you. It made me feel sad and bittersweet all at the same time.

It was realistic and I know that everybody can relate to this. I think everybody should read this and fall in love with it, because you wrote what I have thought at some point and what some other people have. Seriously, this was perfect and poetic. I love how you wrote this and the style you used. It really hit me straight in the heart. Good job with this story. It was amazing. :)

This is such a realistic read. I feel like this is just a leaf out of so many people's books but you've written it much more poetic. I read this six times - I finished and went back to the top and started it again.

So next time I’ll walk with her to the crossroads and I’ll hold her hand,

This line gave me chills, I'm not sure if it's because crossroads are an old, urban legend where you make deals with the devil, but it really gave me chills. It really fitted with the story of promises to change and love who you are.

I want everyone on mibba to read this piece and fall in love with it like I have because I'm sure a lot of people can relate to the subject matter. As far as I'm concerned, you have not made any mistakes grammatically and punctuality-wise so that was refreshing. Splendid one-shot, indeed.

This is quite beautiful. The way you wrote it was very poetic and appealing. It's extremely well-written and I get that vibe that you were originally going for a song. It has a melodic quality to it, which I thoroughly enjoyed reading.

But it’s always goodbye, and never quite good.

I loved this line. It was my favourite in the whole story. It's kind of sad, yes, but it's so wonderfully phrased that I'm really taken with it.

Everything flowed so lovely and I liked the slow transition from this sort of pessimistic view on love to looking to a brighter future where it will work out with her eventually. I really liked the repetition in this, especially how when you did repeat lines, you made those subtle changes that reflect that viewpoint transition. The last line was simply brilliant though and the best part. I thought it ended the story perfectly. This is truly a great one-shot.