January 27th, 2014 at 11:01pm
I had to Google Eric Northman because I wasn't sure what type of fan fiction this was. I don't watch a whole lot of vampire stuff. I watch Vampire Diaries sometimes but I didn't recognize the name.
Back to the story, the story idea is great, yet kinda sad at first. My grandpa died of cancer. Anyways, I have a question about the text. After Googling this and realizing it was a True Blood fic, I read the first chapter and one thing popped out at me. How did they immediately know that they were vampires? Do they have visible fangs in True Blood? Like I said, I don't watch the show so I don't understand. Other than that, it was pretty straight forward and actually pretty good! Good Job!
Honestly, I had no clue who this was about when I first began reading it. I've never been too into this kind of thing, but it was alright. There were a few things that I, personally, would have changed. I feel like there could have been more imagery going on, and the grammar was a bit distracting. But, other than that, the overall story was pretty fantastic. I loved the fact that Cataleya had a genuine, real life decision to make. That part of the story was my favorite.
It was actually quite depressing, seeing as my grandmother, who I was quite close with, died of cancer just a few years ago. It's hard, it truly is. But I also adored how strong she was about the entire situation. She seemed to have a genuine attitude about it, and I liked that she did.
The layout I personally thought was beautiful. A bit bright, but beautiful all the same. It reminded me, in some ways, of the thirteen year old girl she actually is. I loved that. Well done, keep going!