June 11th, 2013 at 08:41pm
This is very sentimental. I can feel a lot of the emotion that the character is going through.
Overall I do like it, but there are some grammatical and spelling errors that I noticed while I was reading it. I also think that some of your sentences could be worded around a bit more so that it flows more together. Besides that it's a good peice that demonstrates the point you're trying to get across.
thank you very much for the reading and pointing out what's wrong. if you have time, maybe you could tell exactly which words are misspelled?