When You Wish Upon a Star - Comments

This is a beautiful story. It is heartbreaking and that is why I love it. Not because I adore sadness, but because it is real. My cousin passed away recently from cancer, and like Caitlin, the way I get to remember her each day is with a smile on her face. She was much older, but I still see her as a princess. And this just touched me. It made me cry, and I can't thank you enough for writing it. It captures the emotions of losing someone to this disease so accurately, and I'm sure anyone who has suffered this situation would agree. Great job, and like Katie said, there were a few grammatical errors but they were minimal and didn't take away from the story.

One of my new favorites.

This was the saddest story ever! I can't even imagine what it's like to lose your baby sibling to cancer, but I'm glad they at least got to make her last moments special! Caitlin was just so adorable when she got to be a princess for a day and I can just imagine her being so excited and waving to her family. The funeral was just absolutely tragic. I can just imagine all of the people there being so upset at losing someone so young way too early, especially when they have been dying for a long time like Caitlin was. This was so beautiful and sad and I'm so glad I read it!

Oh my gosh, that was just a roller coaster of emotions! First, the beginning was just adorable and I could just picture little Caitlin as a Disney princess! And then the end was just so sad. I can't even imagine what it would be like to lose a sister to cancer, and you portrayed that very well! Especially the funeral scene, where they were burying her. It was just tragic. I absolutely love that you added the quote at the end because it just fits so perfectly. That was just so sad, but so beautiful at the same time and I really thought it was phenomenal! You did an amazing job and I really loved it! It was the perfect amount of tragedy with a twinge of happiness.

The only thing I noticed was a couple grammar errors, so I'll just point those out really fast in case you want to change them, since they were just small little errors!

"Up on the float, she wore her own ball gown; a miniature version of her favorite princess’s in her favorite color."
I think the ; should be : since the second part isn't a separate sentence.

“Thank you,” she squeezed me close and kissed my head. “You did this. Your father and I couldn’t be more proud to have two amazing daughters.”
The comma should be a period, since the tag after the dialogue isn't explaining the dialogue, but is a separate sentence. So.. “Thank you.” She squeezed me close and kissed my head. “You did this. Your father and I couldn’t be more proud to have two amazing daughters.”
Same thing here “That’s not the point,” my mother kissed my head again. “Just know that we’re proud of you both.” So... “That’s not the point.” My mother kissed my head again. “Just know that we’re proud of you both.”
And here “That’s my favorite image to remember my sister by,” my hands tremble as I stand at the pulpit of our church. "
And here “I wonder if they have crowns up in heaven,” I squint up at the sky through the last of my tears.

"Instead, she frantically waved to us; using both her hands. "
I think the ; should just be a ,

"Walking into my parents embrace, my heart brakes for what may be the "
brakes should be breaks

And that's it!
This was seriously just so beautiful and I love it so much! Thank you so much for writing it