Wasting All These Tears - Comments

  • heretic.

    heretic. (210)

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    I've missed this story so much!

    Oh my god, what are they going to do to her?! Crazy Surely, they wouldn't hurt a pregnant woman..right? I'm dying to find out who took her father's gun and killed Val, I don't believe it was her dad, at all.

    Charles is handsome Lick
    June 21st, 2014 at 10:59pm
  • heretic.

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    Finally found some time to catch up with this here story, loved it!

    Matt's such a typical guy isn't he? "I'm becoming a fucking pussy. "
    No Matt, you're showing emotion, that's a good thing. Not everything can be dealt with a gun and a cold, evil stare xD

    Ohh, so the gun used to kill Val belonged to the police? The owner of said gun had better run very fast and hide, cause Matt won't stop til he finds out who the culprit is! I just hope poor Aerial doesn't get caught in the crossfire D:

    Poor girl, finding out from a TV reporter that the father of her child is dead, and murdered no less, must have been a hard pill to swallow! No matter that she no longer felt for him, he's the father of her child, still sucks to find out like that and definitely not good for her or the baby. I agree with Damsel, I think it would be better for the kid to believe that their father died before they were born, no one wants to find out their father didn't want anything to do with them.

    I don't blame Jeanne for wanting to increase the protection around their home, it's not everyday you find out two rather large, scary ass dudes may or may not be after you! I wouldn't have stopped at the dog either, I'd be wiring all kinds of surveillance cameras and alarms up to my home. Maybe I'm just paranoid xD I do hope the guys don't go all mafia on the dog though, no one needs to see that shit, especially not a heavily pregnant girl!

    I understand why she wouldn't want to question her dad over the phone, it's a delicate situation that needs to be handled face to face so she can gauge his reaction, his facial expressions, body language. Men lie. XD not to mention there could be ears around her listening in on her conversation or watching her. My god, now I do sound paranoid! Haha.

    But I know she won't let it lie, her curiosity would get the better of her and she'll simply have to know. Even though it could endanger her. I hope she'll be okay!

    Also, I really liked the starting paragraph of chapter 6, very deep and meaningful. I can almost imagine it being how a narrator starts of a film or a play, you know like in HIMYM, the father starts off each episode with a speech? Okay I'm rambling haha, loved the last two chapters, more sooooon! :D
    August 25th, 2013 at 03:57am
  • Damsel of Darkness

    Damsel of Darkness (150)

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    I feel bad for Ariel. I mean, it's gotta be hard finding out that the father of your baby has been murdered... even if she doesn't still love him, it's gotta be painful. I couldn't imagine going through that, I'd probably fear for my unborn child and my own life... especially if I had no clue who had murdered him in the first place. Sad

    I don't blame her roommate for wanting a guard dog. Considering how dangerous the guys she had a run in are... and the fact that her ex just turned up dead, it wouldn't be the worst idea in the world for them to get something to at least alert them to potential threats. I just hope nothing ever happens to the doggy...

    Well, I can see why she wouldn't want to confront her dad over the phone... and honestly, at this point, she's probably better off not knowing if they were in fact talking about her dad. The less she knows the better. But judging by her character--or what I've seen of it--she won't be able to let it go, she'll wanna know the truth... even if it gets her into serious trouble!

    Looking forward to more when you can Smile
    August 7th, 2013 at 06:52pm
  • AvengedFanfoREVer

    AvengedFanfoREVer (100)

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    Loved it!
    Please update soon!!
    August 7th, 2013 at 06:44pm
  • Norman Reedus

    Norman Reedus (400)

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    JUst found this and I'm loving it, buuuut WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LEAVE IT AT A CLIFFHANGER. This is not fair.

    Update sooooon
    August 4th, 2013 at 07:55pm
  • Damsel of Darkness

    Damsel of Darkness (150)

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    “I’m becoming a fucking pussy.”

    Haha, trust a guy to think that... silly boy. You're simply having emotion... which is hardly a bad thing.

    Ooh, so... the gun that kill Val was owned by Ariel's father? Well, that's surprising... and not good for her wellbeing. Then again, why take it on her? I get the 'eye for an eye' deal, but it's hardly fair to Ariel... just kill the person who killed Val. That seems fairer to me!

    Well, she now knows her baby daddy is dead. I get why she'd be upset initially, but it's no real loss in the long run... I think her child is better off believing that their father died before they were born, rather than knowing that he hadn't wanted anything to do with them. Bit easier to swallow.

    I hope you find time to write in the hectic coming weeks! I really do look forward to the next installment of this one Smile
    August 4th, 2013 at 02:10pm
  • heretic.

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    Oh shit, big bad shads is pissed!

    He did not just call me fat, did he? Oh hell no Matt!
    Imagining his eyes staring back at me, yeah that would freak me out too! Considering he doesn't want her saying anything, they've made a pretty big fuck up talking shop in front of her and revealing their first names. Boys, you so dumb XD

    Looking forward to more, so much drama!
    July 30th, 2013 at 08:20pm
  • Quizzical Miss

    Quizzical Miss (100)

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    I want to smack or severely bludgeon Matt into next Sunday or beyond for being a total prick to her but I understand it... He's Mr. Macho in public after all, and she saw him at a rather weak, private moment, let alone overhearing his private business arrangements.

    Oh, no –he just threatened to kill her and the baby. :/ I think that’s an empty threat, effective for now, but empty. After the traumatic experience of losing his own wife and child, I highly doubt he’d ever be able to bestow such a heinous act on someone else.

    And he called her fat… The guy has some serious balls insulting a pregnant woman’s appearance… especially in regard to her weight… She might pay back for that, later!

    Brian’s a good guy for standing up for her! Even though his word choice in referring to her changed to ‘bitch’ after Matt accused him of only liking her for her looks… The fact that he used Matt’s kryptonite –Val and his unborn child, to save her was great. He’s protective of her already and he’s not even involved with her yet, whether it was because of her father or not! It sort of implies that Brian’s in the lead for her heart… He would be the easier choice, but I think Matt could redeem himself with a lot of sucking up and determination!

    The irony… Those idiots are hell bent on not divulging information and yet, they have not only used their first names, but have just talked about business in front of her –again! Are they nuts? They are just asking for her to remain in their lives –a thorn in their sides or something much more pleasant… I can’t wait to find out!
    July 27th, 2013 at 03:47pm
  • AvengedFanfoREVer

    AvengedFanfoREVer (100)

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    Oh shit!!
    Please update soon!
    July 26th, 2013 at 04:43pm
  • helena_88

    helena_88 (100)

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    oh man so her father is a cop and helps shadows and his ''gang''.. val and the baby got murdered.. michelle left brian thanks to that.. her babys father is dead thanks to matt and brian.. now they know that she knows that her father help them out with stuff.. oh this is just so good Mr. Green
    July 26th, 2013 at 03:33pm
  • Damsel of Darkness

    Damsel of Darkness (150)

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    Sheesh, well, she’s got herself in quite the pickle. I can’t help but wonder what attracted her to the guy that got her knocked up… I mean, I know it says in the summary that she didn’t know he was married, but she seems like the kind of girl who isn’t naive. So it’s kind of surprising she’d let herself get caught up with a married man. Oh well, shit happens, I guess. Haha. Although it must suck to know she’ll always have a tie to him with the baby…

    So it appears she has no idea that her father is mixed up with the underbelly of the city. It makes sense, however, since I suppose he’d be very secretive about his deal… not something he’d be overly proud of, which is understandable.

    The lights were still off—what, did this guy have fucking night vision, too?

    Hahaha, well, he does where sunglasses all the time—day or night—so maybe his eyesight is heightened by the dark. Haha.

    He did not just call me fat, did he?

    Oh, he did… apparently he didn’t learn with his poor wife (aww, sad…) that pregnancy hormones can make a women borderline crazy. Insulting one is like bending over and asking to be paddled… I’m sure if she wasn’t terrified, she would’ve gone ape-shit on his ass. Intimidation would’ve definitely taken a back seat. Haha.

    I’m not sure if I believe that Matt really would’ve killed her. I mean, I know he’s got a short fuse and his pissed off at the moment, but yeah, I’m just not sure I could see him really killing her. Only because she’s pregnant and after his recent loss, I really doubt he could’ve gone through with it.

    I must admit that I find it a little amusing that he is so dead set on keeping their secrets, secrets and handling it when the wrong people find anything out… but he’s still talking! I mean, him and Brian are discussing her father and what he’s doing (or not doing) for them while she’s in the same room. Silly boys. Hahaha.

    See? They talk too much. She knows their names now. Hahahaha.

    Well, at this point, it’s honestly hard to see which guy she’s going to end up with (I’m assuming she’ll end up with one of them eventually) as it really could go either way. I mean, yes, at this stage Matt is scaring the shit out of her and Brian saved her life… but I can still see Matt having a chance; especially considering the circumstances. But I guess I’ll just have to wait and see…
    July 26th, 2013 at 01:58pm
  • Moriarty;

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    I wonder who the baby Daddy is? And those two mysterious men- well we know they're the guys obviously- but what's going to happen? Hmmm....scary stuff! Also, she better be worried if he's that angry- big bad Shadows is freaking terrifying when he wants to be. I can't wait for the next chapter- more soon please!
    July 25th, 2013 at 10:13am
  • Quizzical Miss

    Quizzical Miss (100)

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    I don't think it's coming along slowly, I actually think it's good how you are introducing each of the characters and the storyline in different perspectives. It's very clever :)

    This story, as I said before, intrigues me. I think it has something to do with the snippets you give from each point of view that paint part of the picture but not all of it -leaving us guessing, making assumptions.

    Isn't it annoying waiting for something to happen... It always seems to go that while you wait for it, it never comes... and the moment you walk away and aren't prepared, it comes... Too bad this isn't going to happen for Her :( She's in for a nasty shock!

    I feel sorry for this girl. She's obviously wrapped up in this scene with no clue as to the depth. She's really only just starting to unveil bits and pieces and I bet it's going to be a massive shock when she faces the reality of the situation... whatever that situation may be!

    She seems to be rather headstrong -working long hours despite her pain and discomfort, but she doubts herself sometimes, like with the ultimatum for Carver... even though she has no idea what's happened yet. I am really intrigued with how she will handle it when she finds out, and if she gets close to the guys before it's revealed or not.

    As to Matt's reaction to finding her (unintentionally) eavesdropping, I'll be awaiting that in the next chapter. I still find it incredibly sad that Val died the way she did... and that he had to hear it happening. The fact that he shows emotion only in private just shows how attuned to the 'underworld' he is. You show emotion... You show weakness.

    My thoughts currently. Awaiting the next chapter! Hustle :)

    P.S. In relation to your reply: "I try not to make the twins seem devilish--I have no idea who they really are as individuals. Plus, it adds more emotion to the plate! I don't want anyone they type of "angry" y'know?"

    I fully agree with this and it's refreshing :) Can't wait for more of this 'emotional plate'! :)
    July 25th, 2013 at 06:01am
  • AvengedFanfoREVer

    AvengedFanfoREVer (100)

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    It's starting to get good! :)
    Please update soon!!
    July 25th, 2013 at 01:47am
  • AvengedFanfoREVer

    AvengedFanfoREVer (100)

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    Can't wait for more!
    Please update soon!
    July 24th, 2013 at 03:39am
  • heretic.

    heretic. (210)

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    So, as well as stalking your blog, I thought I may as well go the whole nine yards and stalk your stories too. I'm so glad I did! I love this!

    I must admit, I do love a good A7X gang story, but it must be somewhat original to keep me entertained. I can just tell this is going to pull me in each and every chapter!

    The emotion, gah! Reading the first chapter, I prepared myself for there to be a fight, possibly someone getting hurt, never would have thought it would be poor Val though Sad

    Poor Matt! The second chapter brought a year to my eye, reading how he couldn't let her go, poor guy! Then Michelle goes and leaves Brian! I can totally understand her actions though, she's just lost her sister and, knowing her husband and brother in law are in a gang she is fearful of her life, I don't blame her at all. Sucks for Bri though.

    I can't wait to see how you integrate Aerial into the story, very much looking forward to the next chapter! :D
    July 22nd, 2013 at 08:27am
  • BelovedSyn

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    @ Quizzical Miss
    Ahhh. Another one! I thank you from the bottom of my heart, my dearest mibbian <3! I love that you enjoy this and that you gave me your opinion. I try my hardest to get my readers to connect with the characters because I feel that it is very important for them to do so! You just have to know the right choice of words, honestly. And if you put yourself in their shoes, it always helps to describe the feelings!

    I try not to make the twins seem devilish--I have no idea who they really are as individuals. Plus, it adds more emotion to the plate! I don't want anyone they type of "angry" y'know?

    Thank you, this comment means alot to me! <3
    July 22nd, 2013 at 06:43am
  • Quizzical Miss

    Quizzical Miss (100)

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    I like this mob story. I like the angle you've gone from- it's original and different. It's refreshing :)
    I like that they are a democracy, not a dictatorship... that they each have opinions... they discuss actions before they take them. I like that each was given the opportunity to put in their view, it wasn't forced on them.

    I like that they are human, that they genuinely love, that they aren't bitter, and that business doesn't come first. They are always considerate of their partners- their safety. They show their want for something better, an out of their lifestyle, but they can't quite fall out of it. After all, they are proud of their accomplishments, just not the dark side that inevitably comes with it.

    Whoa, I wasn't expecting that turn of events from the first chapter!

    I am broken! The tone is set in the second chapter from the first sentence. You have written this so well. You can feel the complete denial, his utter devastation... WOW! It's like his pain is mine... You are really talented to be able to evoke those types of emotions in a reader... Well done :)

    I love that you made Michelle's departure not as bitter as it's generally always depicted. You can't hate either or side with either of them because it's not like that. There was no infidelity, there was no hate, they both love each other, it's just that the circumstances in his lifestyle aren't ideal for them both to be safe and happy; she's just lost her sister- I can't imagine just how devastated she is (I'm still recovering from Matt's devastation). It gives me hope that maybe they can sort themselves out and get back together, maybe! :)

    Well, I'm hooked with this story. I can't wait for more!

    This story deserves a lot of praise. And I can't wait to see what else you cook up with story. :)
    July 22nd, 2013 at 06:35am
  • BelovedSyn

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    @ Damsel Of Darkness
    Ahhhhhh. I love long comments such as this. I really do. I want to start doing this to others stories lol. I am so happy, as I said, that you enjoy this <3 AHH. Im so excited lol.

    As for the mistake--because that's what is, you are not stupid, I have to go fix that! lol. Thank you my dear <3 I shall reword that shit right now lol.

    I would say so much more in response but I am so happy! Ahh! lol. <3 <3 <3 xoxoxoxox
    July 22nd, 2013 at 12:09am
  • Damsel of Darkness

    Damsel of Darkness (150)

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    Okay, so first of all, I'm really enjoying this story so far. I don't generally read "mob" or "gang" style stories--mostly because I feel they're overdone and generally badly written--but yours doesn't fall into that category at all! It's got it's own unique twist to it, so I really have high hopes for your story!

    The first chapter was a good introduction to the Avenged characters. They seem very powerful and definitely not the type to fuck around, which is quite attractive, actually. Haha. I must admit, when he got the call from Val, it was very chilling and you could really feel his urgency to get back to her. And I didn't have a good feeling about it ending well when he did...

    Oh, wow... the start of the second chapter is so powerful. You can really feel the devastation that Matt is going through... the desperation to try and save her... it's heartbreaking. The piece was so beautifully written, really. Well done.

    I can't say I'm surprised that Michelle has left Brian. I mean, it wasn't predictable or anything, but it's totally understandable given the situation and the fact that she's grieving for someone she held so dear. I can't imagine having to be in that position, where you're forced to give up the person you love because you literally fear for you life. It'd be horrible. I like that you didn't write her leaving as a spiteful thing, I like that you wrote it so that as a reader, I can feel for both of them. She has very good reasons for leaving and he has good reasons for her to stay... I really feel sad for both of them. I hope that maybe once she's had some time to grieve, she maybe reconsiders and comes back to him.

    One small thing I wanted to point out was that you accidentally messed up a little in the first chapter. In the first section, he refers to Val as his fiance and makes a reference to when they have kids later on... well, it felt to me he was referencing the future, rather than the present. But then in the next section, he refers to Val as his wife and she's heavily pregnant, so it caught me by surprise a lot. I don't know if this is a mistake, or I'm wrong and the second section is set a little later on and not the same night, as I assumed, but I thought I'd point it out. Don't mean to nitpick, because it's really not a big deal, but I just thought you'd want to know so you could fix it or tell me "Uh, no, you're stupid and it's supposed to be like that." Hahahaha.

    But other than that, this really seems to me to be a great start and I honestly can't wait to see where you take it. I'm really looking forward to the next update! But no pressure, greatness takes time to create ;)

    Oh, and btw, thanks to @Zacky Vengeance; for recommending this story in her blog... glad I randomly clicked on it and stumbled over here!
    July 21st, 2013 at 05:34pm