I'm here to deliver an exceptionally late Mibbaween treat. Sorry for the delay!
You really have a way with words. The way you describe everything is just breathtaking, really. The first paragraph gives off this tiny amount of information but really engages the reader right from the get-go. The narrator is really dynamic and I can see these as a non-stop flow of thoughts muddled down onto the paper. It almost seems like a letter to me, which is a really nice touch. It makes me feel like I'm almost intruding on the narrator's most personal thoughts within the first few chapters and although it's an uncomfortable feeling, it's really commendable that you've managed that within such a small space.
I was really impressed by this piece! Although short, you paint this perfect little world and you've set up some really lifelike characters. Wonderful.
You really have a way with words. The way you describe everything is just breathtaking, really. The first paragraph gives off this tiny amount of information but really engages the reader right from the get-go. The narrator is really dynamic and I can see these as a non-stop flow of thoughts muddled down onto the paper. It almost seems like a letter to me, which is a really nice touch. It makes me feel like I'm almost intruding on the narrator's most personal thoughts within the first few chapters and although it's an uncomfortable feeling, it's really commendable that you've managed that within such a small space.
I was really impressed by this piece! Although short, you paint this perfect little world and you've set up some really lifelike characters. Wonderful.