I'm Just a Man - Comments

@ Thatmom
Thank you :)

Loved this!!

Good! Lol I try not to make things bad...even if it's iffy lol I've had one or two of those...uhh

But yay for answering questions and making sequels!!!! :) and yay for all the comments on this story that really could have gone into a message so other readers didn't have to see this conversation hahaha oh the things I think about after the fact :P

@ hockeylove719
Yup I had ebs. Nothing bad, you just asked all the right things and got the gears spinning in my head to answer the questions. I just lime all the poesibilties you and anothe reader opened up for those two. I want to give it a true happy ending.

It is too common, I've just stopped caring and leave a lot of O's out and hope for the best! I think people on FB think I have a dislike for vowels...

Something to consider, if you're going to include characters from other stories and continue on with them...you may want to put that background info into your new story because not everyone might have read that or wants to (not because of you, probably because of hte player lol). That's why I avoid sequels or continuing characters because Lord knows what I said in one story and will forget about in the next one lol...that's just too much work for me. I'd just take that into consideration for next time because I know you kinda fall in love with charcters you write and you want to keep it going, but you have to assume that you'll at least have one dumb reader (like me!) who didn't read the other story or that did and don't remember the details.

You were the Eberle one, right? I'm far too lazy to do much looking at the moment (terribly sorry lol), did I say something bad? I remember liking that and thinking it was a good start for something longer.

And I usually do numbers, so the number picking is up to you...you fall on a Pens player...HA...sucks to suck hahaha jk but really I make no promises on anything

@ hockeylove719
The Romo thing i think would have made a lot more sense if you had know the little background info on Claire from the Jamie Benn story.

o is way to common of a letter.... i would not like having that missing. ack.

no offense, i actually like that you voice the questions that you get when reading. im thinking that when i get writing i get answers as to why in my head but they never make it to the keyboard. it was actually comments that you made on my summer vacation submission that has going back and revisiting it. a sequel is very much in the works and i hope to start posting it soon.

When you do another contest i will be sure to enter if you promise to give me a person that is challanging and not a penguin lol. also Luke would be higher up if he hadnt made me cry at his concert this summer.

The Romo thing upset me...Idk why lol I was just thinking why don't I know this??? And I went back and reread because it's pretty obvious I'm a flake half of the time and miss things lol. I do that all the time in my stories; I'll start something and then forget about it and be reminded of it and have to throw it in because I'm a freak of nature. That was the thing I was most concerned about. Her attitude, eh, sometimes yu love characters and others hate them and vice versa...not everyone has to like the characters YOU create and LIKE. People tell me they hate my characters like a year after I write stories and I'm like, "I can't change em now...so get over it" lol but I'm mean, so yea.

I don't have an O or Tab on my keyboard...It didn't really bother me at first, but now when I go through things I've typed, I notice O's are missing...a lot. Like bad. I get that mistake lol-it's your fault, but it's sorta not because you can't help that your keyboard hates you...I feel ya!

I'm glad you didn't take offense (or seem to)abut what I wrote because I don't want anyone to. My theory is, you submit this for judging, you take what the person says and either like it or brush it off. My opinion means nothing in the long run and that's why I try not to focus on things I dislike or like because everyone has their own style. I appreciate your entry no matter if I like it or not lol and I appreciate you explaining the things I mentioned because I tried to make them make sense lol...lack of sleep, I start rambling!

But really, thank you for joining and if I do another contest and you join, that'd be awesome! I'm a little shaky on contests now since this one went over very badly lol. And Luke is better than Jason and Dierks...don't argue that hahahaha

@ hockeylove719
I felt like Boston was Tyler's comfort zone and now in Dallas he is a little out of his element. I think one thing that didn't help was a few things you pointed out i should have re-iterated in this story maybe. Like why Romo popped up and maybe with Riley's dislike for Tyler dug a little deeper. I like reading the things you have to say. I seem to come back to them when i go to write other things.
Its funny you should say that about computer keys, My b is actually missing so i am finding myself missing that letter a lot. Capitalization i know i am bad at, i just go go go and unless word catches and fixes it i don't catch it.
Jason Aldean is a weakness of mine...... Just below Dierks.

I liked how you wrote Tyler and made him kinda soft. He's usually the jerk and it was a different approach. I'm not sure I liked Riley's character just because she was very forward and automatically assumed he was going to go after her-maybe he didn't want to, I mean how would she have reacted if he was like "Ew, no get away from me crazy lady."? There's a fine line between cocky and confident and I feel like she has hopped on over the the side Tyler's normally on. It was interesting to see you switch character traits because usually Seguin is the cocky ass, but she was in this story.
Watch your capitalization and some grammar. My keys stick on my computer, so I understand when things like that get missed, but "Stars" was lower case throughout the story and there were some other mistakes...just watch that. I make mistakes constantly and I won't always blame my slow, old computer lol, so I can look past it, but that doesn't mean I won't bring it up to further your writing skills for the future :).
Ok, one thing that bothered me to the point that I was like WTF through half hte story was, who was this Hawkins thing? WAs it a dog? Cat? Child? And why was Tony Romo's name brought into the story? Was she involved with Romo at one point? Then she said something about Tony being at the door for his child...but it was never elaborated on or stated...I was going to message you and be like what's this mean? But then I had to go back to work lol. But when writing a fan fiction, if you include too many different types of athletes I feel like it gets to be too much (that could just be me, but the cleaner the better lol) having it littered with different Dallas players from every sport makes it seem jumbled and IF the character was involved with multiples it makes me think less of her usually...believe me though, I had a story where my character slept with half hte Hawks, so I think it just comes with some stories or maybe with time you see that it just gets to be too much...idk, lol I just try not to for the fact that people call me out on my character being a skank lol which now has made me think htat way too.
Also enjoyed Jason Aldean...
Anywho, winners have been changed, but should be posted very soon, like hour-ish!

@ midnightmssuki
She already said she would earlier on hhaha. I almost put in a line about riley rolling her eyes before the kiss but thought it might be too mean.

It's perfect! I love how you've written Tyler, giving him a vulnerable side as he tries to figure it all out. I love that he pursues her without pursuing her and holds back with that kiss. I love that it's Riley who finally makes the real move and barges in to the bathroom; that girl is in charge. The kiss under the mistletoe was adorable and perfect. I love everything about this. :)

@ midnightmssuki
Ill try not to make you wait for to long.

Waiting on the edge of my seat for more!!

@ Thatmom
It definitely has morphed, into what I don't know yet. But I am having fun with it. Maybe my ideas can work there way into something else I write one day.

Love love when a short story morphs into something much longer. Your writing is wonderful. Just run with your ideas!!!

This is AMAZING and don't you ever doubt it.