Seasons - Comments

  • saegusa.

    saegusa. (105)

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    Then I went and sobbed my little heart out because this was perfect and it just killed me. The mixture of first and second person is one of my favorite things in the entire writing world, and I'm so happy it was used here, it worked perfectly.

    I choked when I got to, "I'm your mess though, right?" and then you see, "Of course, Oli." The "of course" killed me forty-five times over. Oh my goodness. It's just so great and sweet and agggh.

    Then we got to the garden. We got to the garden and then pain and of course, you have killed me yet again. The doctor's visit and everything, everything just tore me to pieces and it hurt so bad, it was just insane. Help me.

    THE END. THE END JUST SLICED ME UP AND PUNCHED ME IN THE GUT AND SLAPPED ME AROUND AND WHYYYY. The final paragraph, it was so sweet and he wants to remember, he wants to remember and it's so much to handle, I need a moment. The last sentence, you know the drill. It killed me.

    You murdered me about fifty times through the course of this. It was a beautiful read. <3
    January 17th, 2014 at 09:12pm
  • lonely girl.

    lonely girl. (250)

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    First, thanks for deds.
    Second. HOLY MOLY. THAT WAS PERFECT.
    Sad and utterly beautiful too.

    I loved the mix of first and second person, though I found it quite difficult to adjust at the start. I love the softer side you've given Oli, and the reason why is so clear in the last paragraph. (Which was also so sad.)

    I loved the story, it was beautiful.
    I'm probably repeating myself. You've made me lose my words.
    Oh god. Absolutely stunning!
    January 17th, 2014 at 02:16pm
  • bullets are hailing.

    bullets are hailing. (250)

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    Holy. Fucking. Shit.

    Okay, sorry. Excuse me as I try to type this beCAUSE AT THE SAME TIME I'M ALSO WIPING THE TEARS AWAY FROM MY EYES.

    This was so beautiful. Already in the first few paragraphs, you could tell how much they both truly care for each other. Their interactions, the fact that it was in Oli's POV, the details, just everything was perfect. And the part where she finds him drunk gave me all kinds of emotions because I could really picture that happening between them.

    ā€œIā€™m your mess though, right?ā€

    My favorite part. I swear, you're making my heart explode, Rianne. EXPLODE. That one line pretty much describes their whole relationship and you've managed to convey the love they have for each other in one line than I have done in a whole story.

    AND THEN THE ENDING. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME.

    Image

    It was tragic and it made me cry because Oli loved her so much and when he said that he could no longer go to the garden because he missed her, I freakin' lost it. Then the fact that he's writing their story because he doesn't want to forget her got me rolling all over my bed and sob because that was RIGHT IN THE FEELS. That's it. Your Hayliver is amazing and I am going to make sure a lot of people read this because it was incredible and your Hayliver momma is proud of you. And thank you so much for the dedication, I can't handle this right now.

    But seriously, you did an amazing job. Arms Arms
    January 17th, 2014 at 10:23am