Into the Badlands - Comments

@ Cl0ud
Thanks for the feedback. I'm doing everything intentional. She's experienced with everything but we don't know how. The storytelling is rushed, yes. But it's for good reasons. It really makes me happy that someone is enjoying it. The story will be more than a couple chapters long, trust me. I have a lot of plans for our young survivor! :)

I am interested in your premise here, but as far as overall storytelling goes it seems a bit rushed. At this rate your story will only be a couple chapters long! Don't be afraid to take some time, help us to get to know the woman more, describe the scene in greater detail. Give some greater thought to what it would really be like in this situation and how you'd really react. Also as a rule of thumb, unless you have a good reason you should be careful with first person present tense storytelling. It can make the sentences seem choppy and the flow of the words harsher than desirable. Just some things to think about.