That Lady - Comments

There are so many questions that were unanswered when I was reading this. Why exactly did she leave? Did she have someone else to go to? Did they try to make it work after all that time? Why did he do it? But the fact that none of the questions are fully answered is what I love about this. It created an air of mystery that will never be revealed.

It was short, but gave so much away without giving the complete story. The two fell out of love, and he did something about it. A horrible thing, but there's nothing that can be done to reverse what he did. The emotion and love, I guess I could say, was powerful. I could tell that the man really did love his lady, and the fact that he realized that he grew as a person because of her was nice. It was nice to read the realization.

This was sad, loving, powerful, and just so many more emotions. Amazing!

@ clockworkprince
Thank you very much for your feedback! This was a story I wrote years ago when I was about 11 or 12. I just wanted to see how it would do if I posted it.

Interesting story! I would have liked to see more history on the character, though. Things like flashbacks or starting off with the woman packing up and leaving the house before transitioning into the present. I think that would have definitely helped me see more for the character's point of view rather than just feeling a bit like an onlooker. I also like how you structured this story, but the constant choppiness of the sentences did kind of throw me off from time to time.

Keep up the great work and good luck with your future stories!