Beyond Redemption - Comments

You weren't kidding about shit happening immediately.

One quick editing thing before I get to my actual comment. Your tag didn't close after Ville was singing, and the whole rest of the chapter is italicized.

Briefly commenting on your last comment, as difficult as it is for Ville, I applaud him for owning up to the fact that his life is the way it is because of his own choices rather than him blaming everything/one else. But yes, it is sad to see from the outside. Yay for having the Liz chapter planned. Is it coming soon?

I feel bad for Ville and Jamie that they had to entertain Bam for the remainder of Jamie's trip. At least he was nice enough to not just assume he could crash on Ville's couch and got himself a hotel room. I felt awful for Jamie having to be stuck next to him on a plane for 12 hours, though. That shitty non-apology aside, I can't even begin to imagine how awkward that must've been for Jamie. Knowing Bam's feelings for her, and not being able to get away from him, I half-expected him to try something on the flight.

My heart was breaking for Jamie throughout. I'm glad she's finally starting to see things for how they really are, but it sucks that she was blindsided by so many things all at once. I can't believe that Bane just up and left like that, only leaving a note. Kinda makes me wonder if it really was him who left the note. I don't believe Liz actually changed, and he's just a pawn in her game, but at this point, I can't feel too badly for him because it's his own fault if he gets burned in all this.

I had a bad feeling about Jamie going out with Bam from the moment he called her. As much as I want to call him a shady ass, and he is, I can't believe Jamie was so trusting so soon after everything went down. She didn't really sleep with Noah, did she? That was just Bam's photoshopping skills. I still can't figure out how he has any friends at this point, but if he tries to be all buddy-buddy with Ville now, or tries to comfort him, I hope Ville doesn't take the bait. Especially since he knows how Bam is. I don't blame him for walking away, but I would've thought he'd at least try to hear Jamie's pov given their history. He has to know that she wouldn't just screw him over like that, though with his history, it's easy to see why he jumped to that conclusion. If I were Jamie, I'd be searching my phone trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

Omg. Please update like now. I wish she could see that she had been drugged last night! And hopefully Bane is actually okay. I have a weird feeling about him "getting back with Liz." I know Jamie and Ville will work it out. They have to!

@ vampire_sun
Right? It must be tiring holding grudges like that for so long. It's such a waste of time and energy and it is sooo unnecessary. I hope one day they realize this and change. Probably not, but it would be good lol

Anyway, yeah, I felt it was pretty important that Jamie knew what that was like for Ville. It's an eye opener for everyone really, as I'm sure it's not even something Ville would tell Anita, to spare her feelings. He definitely doesn't like people feeling bad for him, and he knows that this was his choice, he knew what it was going to be like going into it. He feel she doesn't deserve sympathy for anything actually, as everything he's done in his life has happened form choices he's made. It's an odd way to think, but that's where he's at. He's super realistic about things like that, but at the same time it's just sad to watch from afar.

And I finally have my Liz chapter all planned. I know when it's going to happen and I even have all the content decided. I'm really excited for it because it is going to answer soooo many questions about things and maybe even bring up a few more to wonder about. I'm even thinking of a Bam chapter, but I'm not so sure I need one yet. I may be able to pull it off in another way, which I would prefer, but that part is still a little undecided, because I need a lot to come from him but I also need to somehow tell it in a different perspective. That will be a challenge.

@ A7X_Lover13
Glad you caught up!! Next update is either tonight or roughly 26 hours from now. (I know that sounds super weird and specific but it's true lol) Hope you enjoy!

I finally got to catch up on the last three chapters and I loved them. I am really sad about the ending of the last chapter and anxious to see what happens with Bam back.

@ Captain K Rool
I can understand Jesse feeling that way, for sure, it just surprised me that he would be so blatant about it on Christmas, and when there was company. I can't imagine how hard it must be to be the sibling of someone super successful, and not always feel like you're less than. Or that if you aren't better than your sibling, you aren't good enough on your own. I'm sure if Ville was just a music teacher or something(I don't know), things would be different, but they'd also be different if Jesse was the one gone all the time, and his parents fawned all over him when he finally was able to come around because they missed him. I think it was good for Jamie to hear that speech, though, because it's something she's going to have to seriously think about. Being with Ville now is great, but what about when he's on the road for 9 months of the year. That's a whole other beast for her to deal with.

I saw Jamie being pleasant with her mother as just her being in such a good place emotionally, and not wanting to ruin Christmas by being in a foul mood,so she just agreed to placate her. I hope she doesn't get screwed over by her parents again, though, because that would really be a low-blow for her. I do think her learning to think for herself, and ultimately trusting herself, is going to be a huge step forward for her, though.

I'm sorry your mom is like my sister-in-law. It really is unfortunate, but she's the type who thrives on drama, and I'm not in the slightest. Every time I talk to her,it's either bitching about my brother's ex or her boss. The funny thing about my brother's ex is that even though they were together for 10 years, he resisted marriage hard with her, yet he's been married to my sister-in-law for 9 years now. I'm not sure if she's insecure that he's going to leave(never going to happen) or why she can't seem to get past the fact that he has a past(as does she),but I'm always telling her to just let shit go because it is such a non-issue. I don't know how people can be that absorbed in something that isn't directly affecting them and not just drive themselves crazy.

@ vampire_sun
Lol okay okay lets start with Jesse. He's got a lot of pent up anger and frustration toward Ville, which is natural when in that situation, but Jesse is assumed to often make comments like that about his brother. He loves him dearly, but he feels like he's walking in Ville's shadow a lot, especially with Anita missing him all the time and Kari putting heartagrams on merchandise for his store. He feels a little frustrated with it all, but he never would have said those things without already being in a shit mood with his hangover or if he knew Ville would hear him. Also, that speech was also to invoke something in Jamie later, it'll give her something to think about in later chapters.

The comments about Jonna come from relief in his parents. They could see right through her, its like they kenw she wasn't good for him and that he deserved better, but they kept quiet for Ville's sake. Now, they feel like they can be open about it. He doesn't feel hurt by it so much, but it makes him feel a little stupid for not seeing it, and a little guilty that he thought that everything was supposed to be the way it was. He has a very new perspective on how a relationship is supposed to be and he is still making comparisons and figuring things out.

Bam's apology was literal shit. Like even Ville was questioning the whole thing, but his soft heart got the best of him, which he will definitely regret later. Bam wanted things to be normal with minimal effort, and he knew that if he took a 12 hour flight to apologize that Ville would take it as an act of caring about the friendship, but he's sorely mistaken. And the problem with Jamie, like we've seen in the past, is that she is also too forgiving of everyone, including her mother. Not to mention she trusts Ville's judgment more than her own and she's going to quickly learn to think for herself.

And Ville really does have this sense of impending doom all the time. He's been in so many failed relationships that he just assumes the worst. He's trying to be positive and look at this one differently, making comparisons with old relationships, recognizing where those failed and why, understanding this his love with Jamie is different than any other love he's felt. He's stuck in this place where he wants to be happy, but he's always so worried that he forgets to let himself just enjoy life. And unfortunately that can only get worse before it gets better.

And that's really unfortunate about your sister in law. My mother is the same. Once she finds a reason to hate someone she never forgives them or gets over it, no matter what. And still, after years, things still get brought up about it. It sucks, but it happens to a lot of people, whether they deserve it or not .

@ Loves Light Blue
Lol you'll find out soon! !

Waiting for it to be lunch time so I could post my comments has been driving me crazy! Holy hell, woman, you weren't kidding when you said shit was getting bad, and it has only just begun.

To start, you have no idea how hard it was for me to not immediately scroll to the bottom of the page and read the last paragraph first(and yes I'm one of those people who sometimes reads the last page in a book first), but I held out and just read from the top. What a roller-coaster of a chapter.

I'm a little perplexed at Jamie's mom getting in touch with her so suddenly. Even if it is the holidays, it still seems like there could be something fishy going on, though given that we don't know much of her parents, maybe I'm just seeing things that aren't there. Hopefully it isn't too stressful for Jamie when they do meet up, and both her parents can get over whatever grudge/disappointment they're holding and see how well she's doing for herself now, even though it isn't what they wanted/hoped for her.

I love how welcoming Ville's parents have been(and I'll get to Jesse in a minute), especially since they a)had no idea he was home for Christmas and b) was bringing someone with him that they'd never met before. With Ville's little quips about how different this gathering was from when he was with Jonna, I hope he doesn't start to second guess his family, and think they're only behaving nicely because it is a holiday. I also hope he doesn't take what they're saying about Jonna now too harshly, either, and just realizes that they feel they're able to speak freely now that he's with someone who makes him happy. Sidenote : I've been in this situation before, and it's awful. My sister-in-law hates my brothers ex-girlfriend and is always talking bad about her, and my response has always been that she partially raised me when my mom was sick when I was younger and I turned out ok, and he was with her for 10 years, so she can't be that bad, but it's like she is the devil personified if you were to talk to my SIL. Anyway, back to the story.

What the hell crawled up Jesse's ass? So pleasant one minute, so nasty the next. I get that sibling rivalry is a thing, and it must be hard being related to someone famous but everyone is an adult now, and you grow out of that shit when you grow up. Constantly being compared to your brother, and being questioned on why you aren't just like him would be completely obnoxious, and I don't fault him at all for sometimes feeling like enough is enough, but he certainly isn't any less of a person just because he isn't a world-famous singer. I hope Ville's speech actually makes him think about things in a different perspective from now on, and he's less quick to judge what he doesn't fully know. That truly sounds like it could be an isolating life, but Ville seems to be managing fairly well and not letting it get him too down, but I can't imagine what dealing with that every day, 365 days a year must be like. I don't buy that it was just a hangover causing his ranting, either.

I know I say this often, but I really love the playfulness between Ville and Jamie. Considering all they've been through in the short time they've been together, and how they've had to be guarded about showing affection, their interaction at the sauna/hot tub was great.

Putting it out here now, I don't believe one word of Bam's apology. First of all, did he have to fly to Finland on Christmas? He knew Ville was going to be there awhile, why pick such a special day? Second, that was the least authentic apology I've ever heard. It seemed like he was just saying whatever Ville wanted to hear, and going along with whatever Ville said, just to get it over with. I mean, he practically ran in the house as soon as he could, acting like nothing was wrong. I don't blame Jamie for wanting to stay away from Bam, and I'd do the same if I were in her shoes. Hopefully Bam sticks to his word and does apologize to her again for the way he acted.

It's funny, throughout the whole chapter, I had a sense of dread reading Ville's inner thoughts. Like he almost doesn't believe he deserves happiness, and that what he and Jamie has is doomed to fail or something, but then I read the last paragraph, and it was like a punch in the gut. Please don't wait too long to post the next chapter. I'll respond to your message tonight, I don't have time now.

Oh Christ. What are you doing?!? Lmao I'm so nervous haha

@ vampire_sun
I JUST UPDATED! And this is my longest chapter to date! And I so can't wait for you to read that last paragraph. Ha! It has begun!

@ vampire_sun
Lol somehow I'm also anxiously awaiting the liz chapter! I cannot wait until its time to write it.

I was going to update last night but I ended up falling asleep on accident! But I did decide that this is the last Finland chapter. I like the fluff chapters but it's about time to move on to some serious shit.

Although, I should say the gears are already turning on some of the major events. I just really hope I can write this well. Its starting the shit storm I'm having trouble with without it seeming.. I don't know. I can't really say. Lol see me problem??? Haha but in any case it's finally come to that point. So I'm going to have to figure it out.

@ Captain K Rool
I understand completely about not wanting it to get too fluffy, and needing to move the story along.

Jamie's Finnish lessons reminded me of when I was in college and learning German. We did the basic grammar lessons, and learned how to put sentences together structurally since it's different from English, but then later in the semester, we'd watch cartoons to see how much we could follow, and little things we'd pick up on. It was truly the best for me, because reading something out of a book and repeating it back only worked for so long before I realized I could understand things but couldn't hold a conversation because my brain wasn't putting it all together.

I would love to go to Helsinki one day. It seems like such a beautiful place and it has such a rich history. Christmas in Finland sounds like quite an ordeal. I don't know much regarding their traditions, but I want learn more now. I've always enjoyed learning about different cultures, and seeing how they celebrate different occasions. I do know that Lapland and the rest of Finland are different, though.

Plus, she has to go back home still, and who knows, she might not ever go back to Helsinki, considering the shit that's about to go down. Haha… - That's just cruel! I'm torn right now because as much as I'm enjoying reading happy chapters, I really want to delve deeper into all this other stuff.

While I don't know exactly what's going on with Jonna, I think I understand what you mean by her being important but not directly. She's not central to whatever is going on, but it does involve her in a way. Honestly, I can't wait for the Liz chapter. Ever since you mentioned possibly giving her one, I've been anxiously waiting for it.

@ vampire_sun
AGH! I want to write so much more about Jamie being in Finland, but I feel it would come across as (eventually) boring, too "fluffy" and I would likely lose the interest of readers, even though I have sooo many more things that could happen lol But the chapter I'm writing now (That will be up within the next few hours) Will either be really long and the last Finland chapter, or I'll branch it off into two chapters. I haven't decided yet, I think it just depends on how far I get before I want to stop and go to bed lol

But I'm glad you took note of Jamie's Finnish lessons! I've been studying Finnish myself for quite some time (I have a Helsinki trip planned in a few years time after I go to Orlando Florida and Jamaica) and so far the best way I've found to catch onto the language is to hear it in context and try to figure out what it means. It gives you something to go off of, something to connect a phrase or word with rather than "This is the word and it means this" kind of thing.

And Jamie is definitely in her own little dream land at the moment. Moving to Finland sounds great to her right now, but she hasn't thought of the consequences of that yet. She hasn't thought of "Well what do I do when Ville's on tour?" She's currently pretty swept away in everything around her, but reality will hit her at some point, it just takes some time. Plus, she has to go back home still, and who knows, she might not ever go back to Helsinki, considering the shit that's about to go down. Haha...

The I love you's were a pretty big mile stone too. I thought it would be best to give it the romance it deserves, but also keep it real. I mean, who would believe that there were rainbows and dolphins flipping around in the background while a soundtrack plays and the sun is setting and blah blah blah! Haha. I figured it was a pretty realistic thing, especially after doing so much studying on Christmas traditions in Finland (There's actually a LOT to it that I didn't even add, as a lot of it is old traditions, not always used nowadays. Hell, I didn't even add Joulupukki! lol And that's a story in itself! Not to mention the folk lore differences from Lapland to Helsinki.) But in any case, I think Finland is literally Christmas heaven. I want nothing more than to spend a Christmas in Helsinki! Anyway..

Yeah I was thinking of what to do with Jonna. I think she's about the only one stumping me right now. I'm not sure how to utilize her, as my mind has changed about a few minor things. She's so important in a lot of this, but not directly, if that makes sense. (Although hopefully it doesn't make too much sense or you'd know the whole climax lol) I know what I have to do with Bam, and I know what to do with Liz, I 'm just having a rough time figuring out a few details that can change things drastically. DECISIONS DECISIONS. lol

Anyway, glad you're caught up! I missed your comments Can't wait to see what you have to say about Bam (oh my god especially after I drop what I call "the bomb" soon!!! You're going to hate me hahahahaha....) AND after the Helsinki chapters are done, and like I said I may make this one super long or chop it into two, or who the hell knows, maybe I'll sum a few things up. We'll have to see.

So sorry for the further delay, I had more to read than I thought, and got caught up on the phone during lunch yesterday. I'll message you my thoughts re:Bam in the morning, as I'm a bit tired now.

Ch. 25
These two are so adorable. I'm glad they were able to fall back into their normal playful banter as soon as they were reunited. Sometimes when you're away from someone, even if you talk on the phone every day, it's a tad awkward when you're actually together again.

I was half expecting a Jonna run-in as soon as Jamie landed in Finland, but I'm glad that didn't happen. She and Ville deserve some relaxed time together without worrying about anybody else.

I like how Ville speaks Finnish and just expects Jamie to figure it out based on the rest of the conversation. For little things, that's a fantastic way to learn things instead of just using flash cards or quizzing her.

For a first interview, Jussi's a perfect interviewer. It's nice that Ville's finally able to get his side of the story out, and no doubt he's more comfortable sharing stuff with Jussi versus some random interviewer. Ville definitely knows how to talk a lot without actually saying anything, though I guess that's something you pick up on quickly if you want to maintain some semblance of a personal life. Damn Jussi, asking the kids question already - he's just screwing with Ville since he knows he can.

Sorry this chapter is so short. I swear I had something typed up on my phone,but I must've deleted it.

Ch 26
I'm loving this whole domestic thing they've got going on, and knowing the shit storm that is coming, they need this time together to just be together, like a normal couple, without worrying about anything or anyone. Wow, meeting the parents - at least Jamie got a warning and he didn't just spring it on her once they were there. Meeting parents is pressure, even if Ville doesn't think so, because a) Jamie has no idea how they feel/felt about Jonna, and b)the holidays are always stressful.

Ville can't be mad at his mom for asking Jamie questions about herself considering that's what you do when meeting someone new. The more we learn about Jamie's past, the more I'm figuring out why she is the way she is. What a horrible childhood to endure, always having pressure to be a certain person regardless of how you really feel(if that makes sense). I've never understood parents who can't accept their kids if their kids turn out to be different from how they(the parents) think they should be. Ville's mom sounds great - like the kind of mother-in-law everyone wants. I had to chuckle at her still being mom even though both of her boys are adults now. Guess that's something that never goes away. I can't wait for them to both admit their feelings to each other. Yes it's scary, but I think they'll both be happy they shared.

Look at Jamie being a little more bold. That's good for her, I just hope she doesn't try to rush things with her and Ville just because she thinks something needs to happen before she leaves Finland.

Ch 27
I don't blame Jamie for not wanting to go downstairs with Ville's parents by herself. I wouldn't either after just meeting them for the first time the day before. Her excitement for the holidays is contagious, though. Makes me wish I could go somewhere else for Christmas this year, ha ha! I love that she isn't afraid to show her excitement, either.

It's a good thing Kari interrupted. Your boyfriend's parents house, while they're downstairs, is not the best place to have sex for the first time

I'm proud of Jamie for opening up to Anita while they were in the kitchen. That had to be a terrifying conversation to start, but it needed to be had. Nobody knows Ville better than his own mom, so who better to go to?

Yay, they admitted their feelings to each other! I loved that you could tell the wheels were turing in Jamie's head hearing it in Finnish. Ville was right, though, just because he was feeling it at that time, it wasn't right.

I kinda want to shake Jamie now. Yes Finland is perfect now, but I hope she doesn't make a rash decision about moving. The reason it's great now is because Ville is there, and she missed him, but he isn't always going to be there because they're going to have to tour for this new album. Then she'll be in alone in a foreign country where she doesn't know anyone nor speak the language, plus Finland in winter doesn't sound like the happiest place to be, and she could really regret her decision if she's sitting in the tower alone without anything to do.

Looking forward to reading more of Jamie's Finnish adventures!

@ Loves Light Blue
Thanks for the comment!! I have it planned so I hope you'll like it lol

@ A7X_Lover13
Thanks! Will do lol

So cute! I love how happy they are. I cant wait to see how they confess their love for one another. !

I am simply loving the direction this all seems to be going and I cannot wait to see what happens next. Keep it up :)

@ Loves-Light-Blue
Thank you!!