Bella Raven - Comments

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    I love this (and not just because it's a parody like my own tehe )
    In the first chapter I noticed on little thing Phillis? What're you going home so early?"
    The dialogue reads really awkwardly, maybe if you changed going to doing? Unless it's meant to read that way.
    I only read the first chapter but I'm looking forward to reading the rest, and the pending updates. :D
    May 19th, 2016 at 06:05pm