Under the Boardwalk - Comments

  • ShannenLouise

    ShannenLouise (100)

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    Thank you!! I really appreciate the feed back I'll go back and edit it :) I'll be honest just sort of took a stab in the dark with it :D
    July 9th, 2016 at 09:09pm
  • dom the book thief

    dom the book thief (170)

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    Hello! This story is super interesting but I saw a teeny mistake in the first chapter that I wanna point out.

    "Mi Bella" doesn't exist in Italian. If you're going for "my beautiful" then it's "la mia bella" or "bella mia". If you're going for "my beauty" then it's "la mia bellezza" or "bellezza mia".

    I apologize if that sound super nitpicky but I just wanted to point that out. Otherwise, this is a really cool concept. I've never seen anyone write anything about Al Capone unless it was a non fiction book or something like that. I've only read the first chapter (and I loved how you ended it) so I'm going to keep reading now! Nice work :)
    July 9th, 2016 at 05:15am