Crush - Comments

Your banner in the title made me giggle. Only because when I catch someone looking at me, I can't stop blushing and I'd dislike that feeling (bc my cheeks would be hella red)

I liked how you bounced back from feeling sad about not having this person share the feelings back to feeling okay/content about herself when she realized that she wanted him to just be happy. It was a very nice touch because you opened a door for us to enter towards her personality. I felt very sad reading about how her other coworkers treated her. But I liked how he (you didn't mention his name, which I liked) didn't bother to join along with the ridicule. To add to his character, I liked how well you described him; it was sweet and light.

I get this image of him being so sweet I like that a lot but some parts where she's talking about him seems too perfect to me. I think the reason though, is because when you're crushing on someone, everything about them is perfect. It's understandable, yes, but if you included something he did that was out of the ordinary (to which she liked about him -- i.e. doing a little hop when he walked around their working place or the way he said things / how we'll be worked with people), that would've been great to read about. But of course, I thought everything about this was cute. From the start, I was wondering where the story would go based on your summary and title banner. Great entry!

Oh Esther! This is simply beautifully written! I love how in the beginning you show us the contrasts between the two of them. Like fire and ice. Like yin and yang. They are so different yet they work perfectly. And the way you describe him is perfect. I want to meet a guy like him, damn it! And the last few paragraphs! No! He has a girlfriend! Well I'm sure her girlfriend is nice and all... but she likes him. And now she only watches him from afar. Urgh! This hurts.

But anyway, this is a really beautifully written piece. You did a very good job. Good luck with the contest!