Piece by Piece - Comments

I realy like how you began this story; I can't recall the last time that I read a story that began with a divorce. I mean, there have been some where the characters get divorced, but the reader doesn't really get to see how that affects the characters directly, or they were already divorced before the story happened. That's why I like this story already because I feel that it's something different than what I'm used to seeing.

The relationship between Rachel and Sidney is interesting so far. Just by reading the first chapter, I have so many questions about them. Why are they getting a divorce? How long were they together? Who decided to get the divorce (was it both that decided or just one)?

Something else I like is the memory that was placed in the third chapter on how the two initially met. I mean, he wasn't really that conscious for it, so I'm sure she checked up on him as he was recovering and that's how the two really got to know each other. Or I could be completely wrong, who knows?

Oh I really enjoyed the fourth chapter because now Rachel doesn't really know what she wants. And some of my questions were answered. She wanted a divorce because being married to a famous man was too much for her. I mean, I can't imagine it being easy at all. But now she has to decide if wanting a divorce is the best option... I can sense some drama coming up...

Anyway, I am so glad that you entered this in my pre-write contest because if you didn't, I would have never found the story to read. I absolutely loved each chapter I read; so much emotion was put into each one, and I can tell that you've worked really hard on this. I can tell because the characters are so thought out and unique, and the plot (and dialogue) is just so realistic. Good job!

@ melodrama.
You're very welcome! I'm so glad when my comments have a positive influence on their writers

@ Nereid
wow wow wow. thank you SO much for this comment. it made my heart so warm

first off I want to say thank you for reading this even though you have no idea who it's based off of, and still loving it. I feel like some people are turned off by fanfiction if they don't know who it is, so thank you for reading this anyway and giving it a chance!

I've been trying really hard to make this realistic and not something you always see. Really motivates me to update again!

I originally commented on this story about half a year ago but since you posted on leave a comment, take a comment AND UPDATED (YAY), I had to give you another comment showing you how much I adore this story.

Your writing is simply stunning. It's so well structured and eloquent, making the story flow so naturally. The topic is so brilliant, and I know I said that last time, but damn it bears repeating because I haven't read anything on Mibba like this ever.

The update was fantastic. I'm so happy you've updated! It was nice to see more of how Rachel feels and see her be more vulnerable because in the earlier chapters you could tell she was being tougher as a guard. Love is so difficult, especially when you're older, and I'm to see someone write about loves difficulties realistically. There's no teen drama, it's hard hitting, truthful, but so tragically romantic.

Adore this story so much!

(Also just realised it's a fanfiction... I have no clue who the real Sidney Crosby is but the story is so good I really don't care that I have no clue who he is)

I think flashbacks would be an awesome addition to this story! I'm so excited to see what Rachel chooses to do next!

What a wonderful friend Catherine is!!!! A true bestie always tells you the hard stuff:)

Waiting.......

Medicine and hockey. I'm going to love this!!

Can't wait sit to see what Sidney has up his sleave

I loved the new chapter, getting backstory behind Sidney and Rachel is so sappy though. I'm so excited to see where this story goes to next!

I was actually really surprised when I started reading this and it threw in a divorce right off of the bat. That's something really interesting and different -- most stories start off showing the start of a romantic interlude, whereas this shows love coming to an end. I especially love the little details that seem to add to the animosity between Rachel and Sidney -- the chairs being too close, the difference between how she felt about his cologne before versus now, it all just adds to this feeling that Rachel's being overwhelmed by his presence and just doesn't want to be there. That's echoed in Sidney's actions as well -- the nose pinching, everything. It just makes it so much more realistic. You can imagine these pair sitting side-by-side having the disagreements and the arguments. It's quite heartbreaking to imagine, too, especially when the kid is mentioned.

What I find interesting is the conflict that Sidney shows in the second chapter, especially within the interaction he has with Cole at the end of the chapter. It's almost as if he can't stand Rachel - evidenced by his irritation at silly little habits like taking his shirts - but then at the end, he admits he loves her and it's almost as if he doesn't know what he wants. I also like the simplistic view Cole has of the situation -- it's very fitting to a child's view on things. He makes it sound extremely simple, but we already know it's more complicated than he can grasp.

I love this already. It's almost like a story in reverse -- we don't yet know how they fell in love or what caused them to fall out of love, but as readers, we're hooked in right from the get-go. I'm interested to see where this goes from here!

So good :)

This has to be one of the most unique stories I've read on mibba. It feels like a proper book, something I'd pick up at waterstones rather than a mibba story. Your writing style is delightful; to the point yet it has a good level of description.

I love that this is a story about the possible breaking of a relationship, not many stories take this route and it makes it realistic. I remember when my parents went through a divorce when I was about six years old and how Cole feels about it really reminds me of my much younger self. That childish misunderstanding of the situation, but at the same time it's the naive way that you look at it that gives hope that maybe nothing has to change.

I'm interested to see what caused their divorce and maybe even the history of Sidney and Rachel's relationship. You've earned a subscription from me

I like how it starts off with a divorce, instead of a budding romance. It drew me in, and I wasn't going to stop reading until there was no more to read. its a great story and i can't wait for an update

I like the concept, so many stories show the build up to the relationship, not many go over the falling out of love part. I'm curious to see how this plays out.

I love this already! Can't wait for an update

Cole is smart for his age

Loved it

I love hearing that from his seven year old son! Go Cole!

Love it so far

Out of the mouth of babes!!! Yea Cole!!