Bed Building - Comments

This was a really cute one-shot. There was comedy and adorable moments between Austin and the narrator. I really appreciated this. I know what it's like to be sleep deprived and finding everything funny, so this was also relatable.

My only concern is the fact that some of the dialogue seemed a little stiff and robotic. It kind of pulled me out of the story, but not enough that I didn't enjoy it. I recommend looking it over and perhaps changing some of the dialogue and making it a little more natural. Other than that, I really loved this! Well done!

You know what? I loved the first line. Actually, I loved the first paragraph. I feel like I can relate to Nicola so much, I’d probably knock on their door too (haha, I’m such a grump, I really need my sleep). I also found it quite impressive they completed an IKEA bed in an hour and a half! Those things are terrible! (From my experience, at least). Moving on, I really enjoyed this one-shot. The interaction with Nicola and Austin made me laugh, and I love their interactions – it’s so natural and cute. Like the previous commenter wrote below, if you ever decide to continue with this, I’ll be watching…

This was really sweet and I loved how natural it was. It'd be really nice to see this form into a full story because I was already invested in the characters after just one chapter :)