Nephilim - Comments

Holy jesus is this real?! more more ore moreomreorm e

@ T-nig 666
Thanks! Next chapter should be up in a day or two

Holy crap... you're back! =]

Yeah, so Holland, that girl right above me suggested this and I'm glad she did. This is a great story and just, yeah, update whenever you know, you get around to it... Sooner rather than later, if you please, though. For my sanity. What little there is of it...
This comment is way too long. Woops. Rambling.
BYE!

-kayt

like I suggested like nine (if I can count) months ago on your profile, you should maybe give a double update. Hahaha "You owe me", irony.

Holland; no need to pester. Someone already has, and here you go! Chapter 6, nearly 9 months later.

Sorry everyone for the delay. I'll spare you the monologue how much RL is draining me.

God, I miss this story. I liked the sense of humor behind it.

I guess I'll pester you through e-mail next.

really good =) update soon??

I love you.
So incredibly much. This chapter was so...ugh, wonderful. You play out Brendon's emotions so well, from frustration to want, to guilt in a span of an entire chapter.
I love the details of that scene, not because I am a pervert, but it was...almost beautiful? It wasn't a graphic obscene sex scene.

Ryan, oh man, more and more I find myself hating him! Well, not really. He's awfully pushy huh? And Brendon finally giving in, the last few words exchanged between the two of them was the perfect way to end it. once again, you bring it back to Brendon's biggest concern- His religion. I thought, Finally! Brendon's going to stop 'I can't' bull and do it.
I dunno. I still feel like Ryan's using him :(

really good, wow, amazing haha, can't wait for next update!!
great writing style, wonderful =)

update again soon please?

this is really, really good. really good.
great, amazing even.
please update!
pleassssse!
i love this. ryan is such a tease.
love your writing style..
so detailed and just the view of it is wonderful. :]

( last time I tried commenting it wouldn't let me :[ )
Hooooly fuck. This story is just.. Amazing. I got so sucked into those 4 intense chapters. Update soon? That would make me the happiest girl in the world.
xo
-Rosemariejane

W O W.
Amazing. I'm almost speechless.
You're such an amazing writer. Can you tell that I'm insanely jealous?
<3

Update :]

This is the first fic I've read in a long time, and one of the only Ryan/Brendon, just because I don't normally read this pairing.

But, I have to admit, the dirty, secret air about the story is so refreshing after most of the shit written these days. Your writing leaves a lot to the imagination, even while you give so much description. Your phrases and word combinations are bizarre but tasteful and it's brilliant to read.

I'll be hoping to see more soon!

Awwww :-(
Poor Ryho </3

copy/pasting this review like a mad bitch:

ashleyyyyy this broke my heart ;_; holyfuck. this is so fucking beautiful. *____*

I haven’t read something this…in a long, long time. fuck girl. where have you been hiding this from me?

My god. you write so brilliantly and this chapter is just a testament to your talent. <3 <3 I’m so, so in love with how you write and describe things, I can’t say it enough, but fuck. I was so upset when I came to the end, like, no dammit. I want more.

I love how innocent(?) they seemed in this chapter. that scene just seemed so natural and so sweet. I love how you’re slowly showing us a different side to Ryan and like, when he said he loved Brendon, my heart broke because he really does, but then Brendon slapped him away. ;-; So right away it looks like Ryan already knows how he feels about Brendon, and that’s why he sleeps around and whatnot later on. DENIAL IS NOT JUST A RIVER ;-;

The sexual tension is killing meeee. I love how you’re taking this slowly. ugh, you’re evil. I desperately want to know what ryan’s plans are after ~school.

edit: Re-read this and it still amazed me how you can write one scene, one scene that usually would be small and write it into something so scenic and elegant. You captured that scene wondefully. *envy eyes*

Thanks so much for the reviews/readers!

Faster update this time, as promise!

:] And as you will see, the homophobia is taking to take its effect.

Chapter One-
I want to start off by saying that if I had known that this was a Ryden, I probably wouldn’t have responded. Not that I don’t like their music, or the pairing, it’s just that I know nothing really about them, plus I’ve never really read one that I liked…You have broken this trend. For starters, the small introduction pulled me in immediately and never let go. I’m fascinated with the fact that you are addressing both homosexuality and religion together, I’ve never really seen that before in a story despite the fact that a common person would probably speak about that first if asked their opinion on the matter. I like the fact that there was a bit of angst hidden beneath all of it, along with a pinch of shame. At the same time though, it was only when I completed reading chapter two that I really started to understand the intro. I know that it is supposed to be out of place, but I think it was just a bit too much. It felt like a summary to me. I have to admit though, the last line was catching, and I adored it.

In the first part I you described your actions so well, and they seemed to fit well with the topic of the conversation. My favorite was “ Ryan grabbed Brendon’s chair, turning it so that the back was against his chest and his legs straddled the sides. I see that all the time in everyday life but I’ve only really seen it in one other story, well done. The dialogue was crude, but generally appropriate for their age and setting, and it flowed remarkably well. The fact that you turned something playful to something serious is I thought was very observant of you, but then to go back to being fun again. It’s so brilliant. I think through those three transition you some how created this awkwardness between the two, as if I can already feel the tension burning when Ryan becomes more demeaning. Speaking of, I love all the vocabulary that you use in the story. They are words that most people no, but for some reason they aren’t used much. It was refreshing.

I adore the all the ways you describe blushing. Each one has something unique, and it truly doesn’t feel like you overused the action. All of the colors you used painted and abstract picture in m head and I could see and almost feel everything you were saying. You have a true gift of imagery.

And the kiss,:cheese: it was so perfect. When I read I felt as if time stopped and everything began to move in slow motion. The mentioning of how Ryan tasted like strangers was good and I just loved the fact that Brendon couldn’t stop. The fact that he was thinking after a few moments was nice too, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a character actually think while being kissed. And since I’m talking about characters, I have to say that I think Ryan’s personality is interesting. I like how he is dominating, sarcastic, and has many ‘partners.’ I think this pops out a little more in the second chapter but I just thought I’d mention that I really like how you have created him.

The lead out is exceptional. I fancy that Ryan is acting all nonchalant about it where as Brendon’s glasses are fogged and he is sweating and panting, it added a lot to both of them. “You okay? I didn’t mean to trip on you.” That line is priceless, again, I can’t convey to you how much I love Ryan’s character in this. I think I found the secret ingredient in this Ryden, that I didn’t see in all the others, Ryan is never the swaggering one. I think the last little bit is my favorite, out of everything. The handprint their to me almost signifies the sheer power that was packed into the kiss. It made me feel that the kiss was multi-faceted, and combined a lot of thing that maybe both of them have wanted to express? I really don’t know...But I liked it.

I really hope that you can update this soon, because I am so excited for the future of this. This is one stunning piece, you have a true talent.

:arms: