Trying and Failing. - Comments

Thank you so much for reccing this to me, Tasha. :cute:
I did cry. :tehe:
This is just fantastic. I think the places you really shine are the journal entries - it's all very poetic and ethereal. I loved the innocence you managed to convey.
I hope you don't mind me saying this, but I found the narration a little flat in places.
Like you had great ideas for parts of the story, and those parts were well-written, for example the first and last chapter, and the one where she was getting out of bed, sorry, iFail at memory, they were really enrapturing, you got really drawn in, but a lot of the stuff in between was just filling in until the next part that you were really inspired for, if that makes sense. :shifty Instead of having emotion, some of it felt more like an essay or something you would write for school.
This story was great, I really loved it, but I think that in the future, you should consider the tone more throughout.

-is outraged that this only has three comments :cheese:-

This is one of the most beautiful stories I've ever read.
It's just...wow. :cheese:
You're such an amazing writer, holy crap.
It was absolutely amazing!

wow, thats... wow, I'm lost for words, very well written, keep writing!!!

You're story is relaly cool. I know from experience just how...addictive and oblivious anorexia can be. You don't realize just how...skinny you actually are. It's really accurate. It's really good.

i am absolutely in love with ur story! i love the story line very much. i subscribed =]
plz update :brightside: