Almost Easy

A couple weeks and a couple sessions had passed since Hollis had heard Zacky’s song and as far as Hollis knew, he still hadn’t told Brian that he had written a new song. She was busy getting ready for Zacky’s weekly session when the phone rang. She hurried over to it, knowing that Zacky would be in shortly and she didn’t want to be on the phone when he arrived.

“Dr. Thompson” She answered promptly.

“Hi, it’s Zacky.”

“Hi Zacky, I’m expecting you soon, is something wrong?”

“Well, I had forgotten to mention that I wouldn’t be coming in this week.”

“Is there a problem? You haven’t missed a session yet.”

“Well, it’s the anniversary of Matt’s death. So Brian is going to bring me to the cemetery to visit him.”

“Oh, well that’s very kind of you. Did you want to reschedule for another day this week so you could still have a session?”

“Well, I was actually calling to see if you could come with us and maybe we can talk or something at the cemetery. I know that you don’t have a patient after me so you have time. But if you have other stuff to do, I understand.”

“Zacky, I would love to. It means a lot that you’re asking me to go with you.”

“Well Brian and I are leaving now, so we’ll be over to pick you up in like fifteen minutes, is that okay?”

“Perfect. I’ll see you soon.”

“Bye”

She hung up the phone and sat down at her desk. She knew that it was a big deal that Zacky was asking her to go with him, because she knew how hard it was for him to tell her about Matt in the first place. She began to feel anxious, not really knowing what she would do once they got to the grave, she knew that Zacky would be expecting her to have comforting words, but she (for once) had no idea what to say. She knew that it wasn’t a time to comfort with diagnoses or textbook answers; she needed to respond as a friend – something she wasn’t used to.

“Dr. Thompson. Mr. Haner is here to pick you up” Veronica’s voice came in through the intercom. She stood up from behind her desk and grabbed her purse and coat before shutting the light off in her office and closing the door behind her.

“Veronica, I’m going out for a few hours. I don’t have another client until twelve thirty so I’ll be back by then. If anyone calls, just take a message for me.”

“Yes Dr. Thompson”

Brian was standing in the doorway of the office and smiled when she saw him and kissed him lightly.

“Hello to you too” He said, taking her hand as they walked down the stairs and to the car where Zacky sat waiting in the passenger seat.

“How are you doing Zacky?” She asked as she climbed into the backseat, sitting in the middle so she would be able to talk to both Brian and Zacky.

“Okay I guess.”

“As well as can be expected?”

“Yeah. That sounds right. I should have gone to see him sooner…I can’t believe I waited a year to come and see him.”

She placed a hand on his shoulder, “He’s not going to be angry with you Zacky. You’re showing your respects by going at all and just by keeping him in your thoughts is respect enough.”

He nodded and they rode to the cemetery in silence. They drove into the gate of the cemetery and Brian drove towards the back of the large expanse of land and stopped in front of a black tombstone. Brian stopped the car and the three of them climbed out.

Zacky was the first to get to the stone. Running his hand over the engraving.

Matthew Charles Sanders.
1983-2008
Seize the Day.

Hollis and Brian stood behind him as he knelt in front of the stone, one hand still on the stone. Hollis moved and knelt down slightly behind him, putting a hand on Zacky’s shoulder, “Do you want to say something?”

“I can’t just talk to a rock. It’s not Matt.”

“It’s a symbol of his life. Don’t feel like talking to a rock would help relieve some sadness you might be feeling. I know that you have been feeling better when you actually talk about something.”

“I asked you to come as a friend, not as my doctor.”

“Zacky, go easy on her. She’s doing you a favor by being here. She’s just trying to help, you know that.”

“Sorry Hollis. I just miss him.”

“I know. But I think that you should try to say something. Do you want me to say something first?”

“But you didn’t even know him…”

“It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t mean that I can’t talk to him.” She said and placed a hand on the stone beside Zacky’s and moved to a sitting position in front of the tombstone.

“Hi Matt.” She said simply in a low, caring voice. She closed her eyes slightly and took a breath. Both Zacky and Brian watched her intently, talking to a dead man she never knew.

“I know you don’t know me, but I’ve heard so much about you. I know that you were an amazing soldier, and an amazing person on top of that. I also know that you are missed more than you can ever know. I think Zacky has something to say to you now, but just know that I wish that I could have met you and that I miss you, even if I’ve never met you.”

She took her hand off of the stone and took Brian’s hand in hers, even though he was standing and she was sitting. He gave it a reassuring squeeze, letting her know that she had done well.

Zacky took a deep breath and tried to keep the tears from his eyes. “Hey Matt. I can’t believe it’s been a year…I miss you so much. I’m not doing to great here without you, but Brian and Hollis are helping more than they will ever know. You’d like them…I know you would. I know I should have come sooner, but believe me when I say that there isn’t a day that passes that I don’t miss you. I hope everything is good in Heaven…cause it’s all shot to hell down here. I miss you man.” He stopped talking, his thoughts ending abruptly as his emotions overcame him.

Brian knelt down beside his best friend and wrapped his arms around him, letting go of Hollis’ hand.

“It’s okay Zacky. Just let it out.” Brian said softly as Zacky cried. Hollis sat beside the pair, looking from them to the stone. She rested one hand on Zacky’ shoulder and the other on Brian’s knee, feeling closer to both of them than she ever had before. It wasn’t long before Hollis found herself crying as well.

She didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but the silence was broken by Hollis’ cell phone ringing loudly from the car.

“I’m sorry, but that’s work” She said with a sniffle, wiping her eyes and standing up to get her phone.

Brian reached out and grabbed her arm; holding her in place, “Don’t get it. Please. Just stay here with us.”

“Brian I have patients today.”

“Hollis, please.” The look Brian gave her was unlike anything she had seen from him. He looked as if he was dying, his eyes held so much pain. She looked down to Zacky’s shaking and crying form and knew that there was no way she could leave either of them.

“Let me tell Veronica to cancel, all right?” She said, sniffling again as tears began to fall.

He nodded and let go of her arm. She walked to the car and climbed inside, pulling the blackberry from her purse and dialing her office.

“Dr. Thompson’s office, how may I help you?”

“Hi Veronica, it’s Hollis.”

“Dr. Thompson I was just calling you. You have a patient in an hour.”

“I know. I need you to call and cancel my three appointments for today. There’s no way I can come in. Tell them that I will give them to next session for free to apologize.”

“All right Hollis. But I think it’s very unprofessional.”

“Veronica, please do not tell me how to do my job.”

“I apologize doctor. I will call them right now.”

“Thank you. Good bye.” She said before hanging up without giving Veronica a chance to respond.

She put the phone back in her purse before climbing back out of the car and walking back over to the most important people in her life.