Collection of Souls

“THE WHAT?!” Mo clamps her free hand over my mouth.

The voice clears its throat, “The Tribulation. And since I know that you all know what I’m talking about, I will not waste your time with explanations. The groups you met in to come to the meeting are your housemates. And fret not if you do not know those with whom you are to live. I would not house you with others that do not match your personality. And you have eternity to grow closer to them! So go, enjoy the people around you, learn your way around. If you need help with anything, just voice it and help will be given.” The cornea searing light flashes once brightly before self-extinguishing.

“Well that was productive. Snack bar?” We each roll our eyes at Bee and Liss.

“So where is our quoteth unquoteth house?” I tap my foot impatiently.

“ADVENTURE!” Mo shouts loudly, startling those standing closest to our group. I cackle evilly at her excitement. “What? We should go exploring. It will help us learn our way around this,” she flaps a hand in a random fashion, “place and we’ll most likely find our house. I vote adventure Rev Matt it!” Her determination sways the rest of us and we all agree. Mo woots in victory. “So which direction shall begin our magnanimous quest?”

“Oh oh oh! I know! I know! Pick me, pick me!” Liss jumps up and down waving her hand in the air. We all just stare at her blinking. Liss is not one to overly exert herself. For any reason. “What?” She’s generally confused as we are still looking at her blankly.

“Oh palm of grace. Palm of magnificent glory. Descend from your mighty dais of dignity. Deign to meet my face in a brief interlude of utter and absolute shame!” I complete my little dramatic scene by dropping my raised hand to cover my face and turning away from the group in mock distress.

“Bravo Lyndsey. Simply wundervoll.” Jen claps ecstatically, wiping away a fake tear. I take huge fake bows, catching imaginary roses from an absent audience. Liss clears her throat, bringing our attention back to her.

“As I was saying before sister decided to be a drama queen,” she glares at me. “I have an idea!”

“And what would this oh so brilliant idea be Melissa? Please do enlighten us.”

“Sarcasm not needed nor appreciated Bee.” Liss moves to an open spot on the floor. “And now! My idea.” She starts spinning rapidly in a circle, eyes closed. Five minutes later, she halts suddenly and points. “THERE! That shall be the start of our adventure.” We look to where she’s pointing and miraculously it’s a door with an exit sign above it.

“Wow. You’d think that there would be better technology in a place like this. A typical exit sign? Really?”

Bee shrugs, “Why change what works?” Mo continues to rant about how lame it is to have a tacky exit sign in so grand a place as we drag a dizzied Liss toward the door. Jen goes through the door first, looking for all the world like a secret agent.

I gasp, almost dropping Liss. “We should play spy! I get the spiffy badge.” I narrow my eyes at them accusingly as I say this last sentence. Jen bounces on her toes, seconding my idea. “It’s settled. My JenJen wants to play spy, we’re playing spy. I dare you to defy me!”

“Freak.” Mo, Liss, and Bee speak in unison.

“I don’t hear any of you disagreeing.”

“That’s cause we wanna play spy!”

“Sweet Zacktion!” I fashion myself a badge out of some paper and safety pins I find in my pocket.

“And you have that stuff why?”

“Always be prepared!” I shake my fist at them as Bee breaks out in the song from the Lion King. “Now, about this adventure.” Mo squeals, running ahead of us. Chasing after her, we probably look like a group escaped from an asylum. We’re loud, we accidentally break plenty of things, and we runaway before saying sorry.

“Car!” Mo points to a red convertible with zebra print seats.

“I’ll drive!” I jump in the driver’s seat. “Oooo cool aviators.” I slip them on, revving the engine.

“I found a flyswatter!” Jen yells in glee and holds up her prize for us to see.

“I got a hat!” Bee and Mo shout simultaneously.

“Well I beat you all. I found booze!” Liss cradles the bottles of beer to herself protectively.

“They have booze here?!” Bee’s face lights up.

“Hey, even Jesus drank wine with his meals.” I peel out. The girls hoot and holler at innocent pedestrians as I speed down the road, fiddling with the radio. Our adventure lasts all day. We stumble upon a few malls, a whole city of nothing but places to eat, massive theme parks, whole stores devoted to nothing excepts the arts, and a city built for the nightlife. When yawns begin to penetrate conversation, we decide to actually look for the house. I take a random exit off the turnpike- which charged a hug as the toll- and immediately enter a neighborhood. The houses are grand, just like everything else in this place. The search for the house is quiet. Mo, Liss, and Jen are curled up together in the backseat passed out. Glancing at Bee, I see that she’s wide awake, taking in her surroundings.

“There,” she points to a mansion on the right. “I think that’s our house.”

“How can you tell?”

“The big sign that says Welcome Home with The Fold written under it. How many other people call themselves that?”

“Good point.” I park on the lawn. Bee and I check out the house before we wake up the other three. Liss will get pissed if we wake her up and this isn’t our house. Looking inside, the house seems to be suited for us. Pictures of each of us are on the mantel in the living room as well. “Let’s get them to bed.” Bee nods, leading the way back to the car. We carry everyone up to their rooms, which have also been decorated.

“Night Lynds.”

“Night Bee.” I close my bedroom door quietly, and collapse on my bed in exhaustion. Today was fun.