Drive My Soul

He didn’t say a word, he just looked at me and so I started to panic, thinking that maybe everyone had lied to me, and he really did hate me and want me gone, and just as I was about to start hyperventilating he reached up and grabbed my hand, tears streaming down his cheeks suddenly.

‘I’m so, so, so sorry Lily. I’m sorry I told you to fuck off, and I’m sorry that I made you mean what you said, about me getting fucked. I’m just sorry’ he sobbed, as he pulled me to the ground beside me and wrapped me in a hug, squeezing all the oxygen out of my lungs.

‘I didn’t mean it’ I said as tears started falling down my cheeks as well as his.

‘Yea you did, and you have every right to mean it, but I don’t want to lose the only person that really cares’ he said.

‘Okay you know what, I did mean it, but only because you made me feel so worthless. The second you said that, my life wasn’t worth living anymore. But I don’t mean it anymore. I care about you too much to mean it’ I reasoned, smiling a little, hoping he would smile back, and when he did, I glanced past his face, looking to see whether anyone was watching, only to find them all sitting in the gutter, not one of them looking our way. This just made me smile bigger, and so I gave him a hug back.

‘I really am sorry’ he said for the 5th time 10 minutes later.

‘Yea I get it, and I am too, but I don’t want you to be sorry anymore, I just want to forget it happened’ I said quietly, watching as Levi came wandering over.

‘So you two sort everything out?’ he asked grinning.

‘Yup’ Jayce said, as he pulled on my shirt, yanking it hard enough so I fell backwards and was lying on the grass beside him.

‘Jayce’ I giggled, as Levi watched on in amusement. I struggled to sit back up, but he wouldn’t let me, so I relaxed a little. ‘Look at the stars, they’re really bright tonight’ I smiled.

‘Yea I know’ Levi commented after looking up.

‘Almost as bright as the other night’ I said, then realised my mistake.

‘What the night you two hooked up’ Levi shot, grinning.

‘We didn’t hook up!’ I objected, as Jayce laughed beside me.

‘You keep telling everyone that’ Levi said calmly. Then he grinned evilly, and I could just see some sort of horrible idea developing in his mind. ‘Lily and Jayce are hooking up again!’ he yelled across the lawn, making everyone spin around and look.

‘Are not’ I said, struggling to sit up again, but Jayce had me in a death grip, not letting me sit now.

‘Are too’ Jayce yelled out, so I elbowed him in the ribs, which resulted in him loosening his grip enough for me to roll away.

‘You suck’ I laughed at him.

‘Yea I know, but it is sorta funny to watch you get so fired up’ he smiled.

‘Ohh yea, absolutely hilarious’ I smirked.

‘Come back?’ he asked nicely.

‘Not a chance’ I grinned, not going to give him the chance of doing something horrible.

‘Please?’ he asked, almost begging.

‘Nope’

‘Why not?’ he asked, now looking a little offended.

‘Cause you’ll do something horrible’

‘Ohh I promise not to’

‘Yea that sounds really reassuring’ I said standing up and offering my hand out to him, to help him up.

‘Not a chance’ he said, grabbing it and yanking me to the ground.

‘Jayce this isn’t funny’ I giggled.

‘Yea really sounds like it’s not funny at all’ he laughed.

‘Ugh would you two get a room’ Levi shot.

‘Shut up Mr puke-a-lot’ I laughed. He just looked at me trying to think of something witty to say.

‘She’s got you dude’ Jayce smiled, knowing it was the truth, because he had just sat with Levi for the last half an hour while he spewed up a stomach full of alcohol.

‘Meh, whatever’ Levi said, turning his back on us and walking away.

‘Ohh someone’s grumpy’ I smiled, settling back on the grass with Jayce.

‘Yea, he’ll get over it. Actually he probably won’t even remember it come tomorrow morning’ he laughed.

‘Good point’

We laid there for about half an hour, and as soon as anyone came near us Jayce would yell something about us hooking up out to the crowd that remained in the gutter and then laugh about it. Then someone suggested going back to the table to play I never, and the boys jumped at the opportunity, but I decided to leave before things got too messy and someone started picking on me. God only knew what sort of crazy questions they could come up for me, what with what they were asking Jayce about his ex and whatnot.