My life as a loser in High School.

I really, really didn’t want to face Dylan the next day. I still felt embarrassed and completely humiliated from last night. Not to mention absolutely furious at him. I had this really strong urge to sneak downstairs in the middle of the night and smother him whilst he was asleep with my pink, love heart pillow.

When I woke in the morning, my alarm clock read half past ten. I slowly opened both my eyes, squinting as the bright autumn sun broke threw my curtains and attacked my pupils. I couldn’t hear anything coming from downstairs apart from the click of the boiler and the light buzz from the washing machine.

I peeled myself away from my bed, trying to be as quiet as possible so nobody realised I was awake and shouted me down for breakfast. I gently prodded my hair and frowned as I realised it was sticking up in odd angles as a result of not drying it properly yesterday. I sighed heavily and tried to flatten it down by combing my fingers through it. After a couple of minutes I gave up and decided to go downstairs.

I paused at the top of the stairs, crouching down to see if there was any sign of Dylan. I noticed his shoes weren’t where he left them yesterday and I timidly took a few steps downstairs.

“Brie, what are you doing?” My mother’s voice startled me and I nearly fell down the rest of the stairs. Well, I guess I did look a little weird crouching down, and trying to peer into the living room.

“Where’s Dylan?” I asked, ignoring her question. I felt my cheeks flare up at hearing his name actually said out loud.

“I’ve just dropped him off home. Why? Did you want to say goodbye or something?” She teased. I glared at her but shook my head. “Oh, and he left a couple of books. He said you had a maths test on Monday so you better revise or you’d be spending either more time together.” Even though the words were coming out of my mother’s mouth, I could imagine so clearly in my head Dylan saying them. He would have that annoying smirk when he said we would have to spend more time together, the he would lick his lips and make me feel totally uncomfortable. I shook my head to rid the thoughts.

“Okay,” I muttered dismissively. I followed her into the kitchen and poured myself a bowl of cereal. My mind kept creeping back to last night and oh my god, Dylan actually kissed me. Like on the lips and with his tongue and on my neck and his cheeks are so soft.

I felt myself blushing again but my mother didn’t notice. In fact she was humming happily to herself whilst some lame pop song played on the radio. I sighed heavily and began spooning my breakfast into my mouth.

I felt different but at the same time I felt exactly the same. It wasn’t like I felt older or more grown up and it wasn’t like it still didn’t hurt like hell whenever I stubbed my toe. It was a just a small feeling in the pit of my stomach with made me tingle whenever I thought of a certain male. It was the same type of sensation when I felt excited, nervous and whenever I was about to throw up but just constant.

I had gone sixteen years without making out with anyone and now I knew what all the fuss was about. “What are you smiling about?” Huh? Oh, she was talking to me. I was grinning to myself without realising it. I tried make my face go normal again but it wouldn’t. Oh no, this would actually suggest that I enjoyed kissing Dylan which I totally did but admitting that would be admitting that I actually ]liked him. Which I totally didn’t.

“I’m just excited for the weekend.” I lied. My mother looked at me sceptically but didn’t press the subject on.

After I had finished my cereal, I headed towards my room but I couldn’t even look at my bed without that unfamiliar tingle in my stomach erupting. Feeling like a complete idiot, I grabbed my covers and brought it up to my nose and sniffed them. They didn’t smell like him.

Okay, I was officially going mad now. I threw my body onto my bed and buried my head in my pillow. It was Saturday morning. I had the entire weekend stuck by myself with my thoughts. Great.

***

I spotted Jay almost straight away when I got into school on Monday. The autumn sun made his hair glow like gold and I made a mental note to remind him that his new blonde highlights really make his eyes pop.

“Briester!” He cooed, placing a sloppy kiss on my cheek. I wiped it away disgusted.

“You’re such a weirdo.” I told him causing him to grin widely at me.

“So how did tutoring with Dylan go? Did you try to kill each other?” He asked, slinging his arm around my shoulder. I paused for a moment trying to think how to answer. Jay was my best friend but for some reason I didn’t want to tell him about the kiss. What if he turned against me because of the fact Dylan had a girlfriend although it really wasn’t my fault in the first place.

I knew that would never happen but still, the thought worried me. If Jay turned against me I would have no one. I also felt a little ashamed of myself because I let Dylan kiss me and made no attempt to push him away. Dylan stole my first kiss and I just let him.

“We got on okay...” I replied hesitantly. His eyebrows shot up behind his hair.

“Really...” He trailed off as the boy himself approached. Dylan had hold of Katie’s hand and he was looking everywhere but me. I rolled my eyes as he walked straight past but I felt a pang of sadness within me. He would never hold my hand in public like he did with her.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. We had the maths test like Dylan promised and I think I failed miserably. Things were starting to look up as we entered the art room though.

“Okay, everyone listen!” Mr Owen yelled although no one was paying attention to him. He sighed heavily and stood in front of the few people who were listening which included me and Jay. “I’ve got exciting news!” I raised my eyebrows and waited for the announcement of new paint brushes.

“The art department have arranged the annual art trip to Italy. Of course the art classes get the first pick of the places. If you are interested in going, come get a letter from my desk. It explains more about it.” He finished off his hurried speech before rushing towards the opposite side of the class room.

“We should go.” Jay said suddenly.

“What? In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not interested in art at all.”

“Hello? Brie?” He reached forward and annoyingly tapped my fore head. “The art trip is in Italy. In Italy there are cute Italian boys and awesome shoe shops, not to mention it’s bound to be warmer over there.”

“Okay, I get it.” I huffed slapping his hand away. He poked his tongue out at me and jumped up out of his seat. I watched as he skipped towards the teacher’s desk, picking up two letters and waving them at me. I rolled my eyes at his antics.

There was already a small crowd around the desk. Dylan was there, of course, with Kate hanging off his arm. They were talking to a couple more people who I didn’t know that well.

“I don’t know if I can go.” I said as Jay pushed a letter into my face.

“Well, you don’t know unless you ask.” He replied with a grin. The idea of going to Italy was warming on me however the thought of the thirty six hour bus ride didn’t appeal to me that much. Plus, it said on the letter that the cost was over two hundred pounds. That was a lot of money and I don’t know if we would be able to afford even though my mother says we have more money than before.

“I’ll think about it.” I replied, folding the paper up and shoving it in my bag.

“Yay!” He squealed throwing his arms around me. “You have to promise me you’ll ask though. Who else is gonna rub sun lotion over my body if it gets hot.”

“I’m not going to do that anyway.” I exclaimed causing him to pout. We sent the rest of the lesson talking about cute Italian boys who won’t kiss someone then completely ignore them the next day.