My life as a loser in High School.

I never used to lie this much. When ether someone asked me a question, I would always try to be as honest as possible because lying causes stress, which causes wrinkles. But lately lies have just been spilling out of my mouth like out of date milk.

I stayed in my room, pretty much the rest of the day. I was trying to avoid my mother because I knew exactly what she would ask me. I wouldn’t know what to say. I was feeling as confused as hell. Dylan left my mind spinning and it wasn’t always in a good way.

Eventually I had to come down for my dinner because if I said I wasn’t hungry or I felt sick or something, my mum would instantly think I had become pregnant and was suffering from morning sickness. And people said I over reacted all the time.

“So, what did you two do when I left?” My mother asked anxiously, spooning potatoes onto my plate. I shrugged.

“Nothing really. We watched a movie and then I went to bed.”

“And that’s it?”

“That’s it.” I agreed instantly feeling a wave of guilt wash over me at the sight of her relieved face. Well, it was her fault anyway! She was the one who invited him to stay over.

I went to bed early again that night, and the whole of Sunday I spent watching sad films and ignoring Jay’s texts. I didn’t mean to ignore them, it was just because I didn’t want to lie to him too although I already had. All of this was Dylan’s fault. For like the hundredth time, I vow I am going to kill him one day. And preferably, it would be slow and painful.

School was something I was not looking forward to. I would be presented with Jay and Dylan at the same time as we all had art together. And Jay would be asking why I didn’t return my calls and Dylan would be stood there, smirking and looking all mysterious like he does when other people are around.

The weather was quite bad as if it had to make a bad situation worse. It wasn’t raining (yet) but the wind was strong and by the time I actually got into the building, my hair which had taken me over forty five minutes to curl this morning, strongly resembled a bird’s nest. I spotted Jay’s golden hair over all the other heads and I made my way towards it because I figured that it would be better if I got this over and done with.

“Hey.” I said forcing a smile on my face. He grinned back at me, like someone would if they weren’t mad and linked his arm with mine.

“I’ve been trying to get hold of you all week. I totally lost my maths homework sheet.”

“You do know that I have tutoring for maths? That should suggest that I kind of suck at it and won’t be able to help you.” He shrugged.
“Yeah, I know, but I was hoping Dylan might have given you the sheet with the answers on for revision or something.”

“Do you really think Dylan would have given me something to help me?” I asked him, with a fake hint of humour in my voice.

“Good point.” Jay laughed. I joined in with him pushing back the traces of guilt. I had gotten away with it and as a result I had probably given myself worry lines over nothing. We both headed over to the art block, and I got comfort from the musky smell of paints and chalks.

Dylan had not yet arrived at class and I felt relief wash over me that I didn’t have to walk past him. His desk was directly in front of mine and Jay’s. Kate was sitting in her usual desk scowling as usual, or she probably would have been if I turned to look at her. Even though I didn’t like Kate that much (or try, at all) I felt bad that I had made out with her boyfriend even though it was his fault, and that I had a small crush on her boyfriend, and that if her boyfriend tried to kiss me again, I totally wouldn’t object as much as I’d like to.

Talk of the devil, Dylan waltzed through the door, giving out that smile that could break a thousand hearts and wearing jeans so tight they looked like they had been painted on. I actually got pains in my legs looking at them (although I didn’t look at them for long as I realized this was entirely what Dylan wanted).

Jay leaned over to whisper in my ear, but even out the corner of my I could see he was ogling Dylan’s butt. “A quid betting that his jeans split when he sits down.” We watched as Dylan parked his perfect little behind on the hard stool. “Doesn’t matter.” Jay quickly said. “We didn’t shake on it.” I rolled my eyes. “He sure does look hot though. I mean, he usually dresses like he knows he’s hot but doesn’t care that much, but now he’s dressed like he knows he’s hot and f totally flaunting it!” Jay squeaked.

“Be quiet!” I hissed back, because I wasn’t a hundred percent sure Dylan couldn’t hear every word of what we were saying. I watched as Dylan unzipped his usual baggy, black hoody to reveal a bright blue t-shirt. I couldn’t see if it had anything on the front as I was sitting behind but I was too much in shock to care. Dylan doesn’t do bright colours.

Our art teacher stood at the front of the class, running his fingers through what little hair he had left. “Okay, I was going to set today’s task as homework, but seeing as about seventy five percent of you don’t bother with homework, it’s going to be today’s lesson instead.” Most of the class groaned in disapproval before he announced that we would be in fact working in the library and using the computers. This cheered people up a bit as it would be an opportunity to improve their pac man playing skills and check their emails.

The whole class stood up, reached for their bags and made their way to the door. Dylan lingered around his desk for a moment until me and Jay walked past. He took a step towards me until we were walking side by side. I eyed his outfit once more. “What’s with you wearing bright colours? I thought you just wore black all the time to symbolise how your life is this big black hole of depression, and nobody understands you so you’re gonna listen to bands who prefer to scream rather than sing their lyrics... Isn’t blue a bit too happy for you?” I asked him, with a grin on my face. Dylan smiled mockingly back at me.

“Brie, why shouldn’t I be happy? I get to see your charming face everyday.” He reached over to pinch my cheek before walking faster to catch up to Katie who was frowning in our direction. I could hear Jay chuckling beside me however he stopped once I shoved him in the stomach with my elbow.

Once we reached the library, I was relieved to see there weren’t two empty seats where Kate and Dylan were sat. The library was a strange place to be. Yes, it was filled with books but as most of them were in languages that weren’t English, they hardly ever got checked out. This resulted in the books being one of the only things that have remained in pristine condition in this school. The once polished and shiny desks had different people’s love interests carved into them. Most of the computers had keys missing from the keyboards and the big, no eating or drinking sign, was already being ignored.

There was a long desk right in the middle of the room with computers on either side. I spotted two empty computers and dragged Jay by the hand to sit at them. Dylan was sat on the opposite side at the far end. He caught me looking at him and smiled. I quickly averted eye contact but it was too late. “Hey, Luke, change places with me?” He yelled across the room. So much for no shouting in the library.

I wasn’t too convinced who this Luke person was but my stomach dropped when the boy opposite us stood up. Dylan grinned at me through the gaps of the computers as he sat down. “Why have you moved there?” I demanded.

Dylan faked a shocked expression. “If you must know there was a nasty breeze. And the sun was in my eyes.” I frowned at him.

“The blinds are closed.” The smug expression didn’t leave his face so I sighed and logged onto my computer. Our task was to research famous Italian artists as the art trip was going to be in Italy this year. The only Italian artist I knew was Davinci and that was only because my Granddad insisted on making us watch the art channel because he thought we were all as interested in flamboyant dead men as he was, which you know, we weren’t.

I flicked through some of the paintings he did, choosing the ones I wanted to print off, when I heard jay speak beside me. “I hope we find some cute Italian boys.” He said, nudging me. I nodded my head in agreement.

“Any cute boy will do really. I don’t really care where he’s from.” I added, dreaming of meeting someone who looked a lot like Johnny Depp, only not quite so old.

“What are you talking about, Brie?” Dylan piped up. I rolled my eyes; I knew what was coming. “You already have me, what more could you want?” Hmm, let’s see. Dylan minus the small fact he was in a relationship?
“I’m sorry Dylan. You’re just way too short. I want someone at least Jay’s height.” I teased him. Dylan wasn’t short at all; he was just average height. However it made me feel better picking on something I knew he couldn’t change.

I heard Dylan scoff. He obviously didn’t believe me. Well, why would he when I’m all over him whenever he gives me the chance? Little does he know that’s it’s actually my hormones not me. Yeah, right. “Don’t you find me attractive, Brie?” He asked.

Some people were looking now. I laughed nervously. “Dylan, no one finds you more attractive than you do.” He wiggled his eyebrows at my response but a pair of hands found their way around Dylan’s neck. Unfortunately, they didn’t strangle him. Kate leant forward to hug Dylan properly before giving him a long kiss on the cheek.

I averted my eyes. It stung somewhere deep inside me when I saw them together. Jay leant towards me and whispered quietly in my ear. “Psycho bitch.” I nodded my head slightly and tried to smile, but I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I wished more than anything I could have told Jay exactly how I felt. He could have given me a hug and told me I’m too good for Dylan and at least tried to make me feel better.

But I didn’t say anything. Instead I wondered once again how I got myself into this mess.