I Never Told You What I Did for a Living
Emily
When I woke up, Mikey and I were no longer alone in the room. I looked up to see a small girl with dark brown hair in pigtails. She was staring at me with wide, innocent brown eyes.
"What's your name?" she asked, her voice so high pitched it was nearly a squeak.
"Lily. What's yours?"
"Emily. Why were you sleeping in a chair?"
"Because I didn't want to go home."
"Why not?"
"Because I didn't want to leave," children had always aggravated me when they asked questions that never ceased, so I answered as simply as I could.
"Do you know Mikey?" she asked, throwing a glance at him as he flipped through a new magazine.
"Yes, I do."
"From here, or from before?"
"From before."
"Oh. Are you here for his brother?"
"Yes."
She shuddered. "Boys are icky."
"Not all of them. Mikey and Gerard are both very non-icky. Why are you here?"
She shrugged. "Daddy fell down. I don't get it. I fall all the time and I never come here."
"What happened?"
She shrugged again. "He grabbed his arm and fell. Mommy called the doctor and they came and got him. He's going to be okay, though. I know it. Falling isn't that bad."
I grimaced at her innocence. How was she supposed to know the difference between falling and having a heart attack? More importantly, how was she to know the seriousness of the situation?
She walked over and sat beside Mikey on the couch. She looked him over for a few seconds, and he looked at me as though I was supposed to stop her.
"You're right," she said suddenly, turning to me. "He's not that icky."
"Thanks," Mikey muttered, a little confused.
I laughed. Emily was cute.
"Can I meet the other boy?" she glanced back at Mikey, as if trying to remember him so she could compare him to Gerard.
"Maybe later. He's sleeping right now."
She stuck out her bottom lip. "This place is so boring!"
"Where's your mom?" I wondered aloud.
"In Daddy's room. She said that she'd come get me when I could see him. That was a long time ago," suddenly, her sad face brightened. "Will you be my friend, Lily?"
"Sure I will. I'm going to be here for a couple of days I bet, so we can hang out."
"That's good," she got up off the couch and started down the hallway.
"Where are you going?"
"I need to find Mommy."
"Be careful," I warned. "Don't get lost."
"I won't."
With that, she skipped down the hall.
"I feel bad for her," I whispered.
"She seemed happy enough," Mikey tried to comfort me.
"She doesn't even know if her dad's okay."
"Stop worrying. Everything will turn out fine. She'll be okay. So will you," he added.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because I know you. You're strong. Gerard's okay, and so are you."
"But," I fumbled with the words. "That little girl is so cheery even in literally the worst case scenario. Why can't I be?"
"Because you're not five. You know about the bad in the world, and you're not blind to it. It doesn't mean you're a bad person for showing an emotion besides happiness, it means you're human. Come on, Lily. You don't see me getting so worked up about this."
"You're right. I need to calm down," I stood up. "I'm going for a walk. I'll be back soon."
"See you later."
But as I turned the corner, I did anything but calm down. Emily was hugging a woman who I could only assume was her mother, and the two of them were crying.
"We have to say goodbye to Daddy now," the woman whispered, her voice cracking.
I felt my throat close up and I hurried to Gerard's room, unable to watch the scene. As I closed the door behind me, I heard Emily wail.
"What's your name?" she asked, her voice so high pitched it was nearly a squeak.
"Lily. What's yours?"
"Emily. Why were you sleeping in a chair?"
"Because I didn't want to go home."
"Why not?"
"Because I didn't want to leave," children had always aggravated me when they asked questions that never ceased, so I answered as simply as I could.
"Do you know Mikey?" she asked, throwing a glance at him as he flipped through a new magazine.
"Yes, I do."
"From here, or from before?"
"From before."
"Oh. Are you here for his brother?"
"Yes."
She shuddered. "Boys are icky."
"Not all of them. Mikey and Gerard are both very non-icky. Why are you here?"
She shrugged. "Daddy fell down. I don't get it. I fall all the time and I never come here."
"What happened?"
She shrugged again. "He grabbed his arm and fell. Mommy called the doctor and they came and got him. He's going to be okay, though. I know it. Falling isn't that bad."
I grimaced at her innocence. How was she supposed to know the difference between falling and having a heart attack? More importantly, how was she to know the seriousness of the situation?
She walked over and sat beside Mikey on the couch. She looked him over for a few seconds, and he looked at me as though I was supposed to stop her.
"You're right," she said suddenly, turning to me. "He's not that icky."
"Thanks," Mikey muttered, a little confused.
I laughed. Emily was cute.
"Can I meet the other boy?" she glanced back at Mikey, as if trying to remember him so she could compare him to Gerard.
"Maybe later. He's sleeping right now."
She stuck out her bottom lip. "This place is so boring!"
"Where's your mom?" I wondered aloud.
"In Daddy's room. She said that she'd come get me when I could see him. That was a long time ago," suddenly, her sad face brightened. "Will you be my friend, Lily?"
"Sure I will. I'm going to be here for a couple of days I bet, so we can hang out."
"That's good," she got up off the couch and started down the hallway.
"Where are you going?"
"I need to find Mommy."
"Be careful," I warned. "Don't get lost."
"I won't."
With that, she skipped down the hall.
"I feel bad for her," I whispered.
"She seemed happy enough," Mikey tried to comfort me.
"She doesn't even know if her dad's okay."
"Stop worrying. Everything will turn out fine. She'll be okay. So will you," he added.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because I know you. You're strong. Gerard's okay, and so are you."
"But," I fumbled with the words. "That little girl is so cheery even in literally the worst case scenario. Why can't I be?"
"Because you're not five. You know about the bad in the world, and you're not blind to it. It doesn't mean you're a bad person for showing an emotion besides happiness, it means you're human. Come on, Lily. You don't see me getting so worked up about this."
"You're right. I need to calm down," I stood up. "I'm going for a walk. I'll be back soon."
"See you later."
But as I turned the corner, I did anything but calm down. Emily was hugging a woman who I could only assume was her mother, and the two of them were crying.
"We have to say goodbye to Daddy now," the woman whispered, her voice cracking.
I felt my throat close up and I hurried to Gerard's room, unable to watch the scene. As I closed the door behind me, I heard Emily wail.