I Never Told You What I Did for a Living

When I got up the next morning, my throat had returned to the scratchy, dry feeling it had had the night before. As I slid from the warmth of the covers, I noticed that I was alone. I vaguely wondered how long Gerard had been up, and I found him sitting at the kitchen table with a large mug of coffee.

My throat screamed out for water, but I ignored it and got out a mug. The scalding temperature of the coffee seemed to calm the dry feeling, and I sat down beside Gerard.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, staring into the depths of his cup.

"Better. I had a good talk with Mikey last night."

"That's good. I didn't hear you come back to bed."

"I didn't want to wake you up."

"You didn't have to worry about it, I wouldn't have minded."

"Yeah, I know, but I wanted to let you rest. I've been keeping you awake too much lately."

"It's not your fault, Lily, stop blaming yourself for these situations that you've had pushed upon you," his gaze snapped from the dark liquid to me.

"It's hard not to. The problems themselves may not be my fault, but it's my fault that you guys are all involved."

"None of it is your fault. I stayed with you through all this of my own free will, and I never forced any of the guys to hang around. We all wanted to. We just want to be here for you. We're like your family, we need to be here for you."

I smiled. "You're not just like my family, you ARE my family. You've seen what my real family is like. That's why I prefer you guys."

A cute grin toyed with his lips for a few moments. "I wish they could have heard that. You have no idea how much they like you, Lily."

"Believe me, it's mutual. If I had a choice, I'd never leave. We'd all just hang out together all the time. That would be my perfect world."

"Too bad there's no such thing as perfect. You've got a real family that still cares about you. Well, your dad does, anyway."

My mood soured. "That's not helping, Gerard."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I was just trying to remind you that you've got to go back sometime."

"And what if I refuse?"

He arched an eyebrow. "Why would you do that?"

I shrugged. "Maybe I should just go back to Dad's place and wait for all this to blow over. Or, better yet, live there by myself until I graduate and then come here. I'd never have to acknowledge my family again."

"You kind of have a pessimistic attitude towards this whole thing, you know."

"How can I possibly see a good side to all of this?"

"Well, you can tell your mom everything you've ever wanted to, but couldn't. She couldn't get you in trouble because she doesn't know you."

"You've got a point," I laughed. "But I really just can't think of something that I want to tell her. To be honest, I don't want to speak to her ever again."

"So, what's the plan, then?"

"Hang out here for today, and then go back home tomorrow? I'll call Dad's cell and let him know. Maybe he'll know when he can come home."

"Maybe, but just in case I'll plan on staying again."

"Don't you ever go to school anymore?"

He laughed, and I watched the corners of his beautiful eyes crinkle with his smirk. "I'm done for the year. I finished writing all my exams two weeks ago. Just in time to go keep you safe when you were by yourself."

"Well at least I know I'm not forcing you to forget about your education."

"I haven't forgotten. It's your education I'm thinking about now, though."

"What about it?" I took a long drink of my coffee, which had cooled significantly since I'd poured it.

"Have you decided what you're doing for college?"

"I've considered it, but I haven't had much time to focus on my future lately. Maybe I'll just take a year off and work. You know, pay back some of that rent I owe you," I shoved him playfully with my elbow just as he was sipping his coffee. He coughed loudly before shoving me back.

"You know damn well that you don't owe anything."

"According to you. I still want to pay you back."

He shook his head, and his hair fell across his forehead softly. He brushed it away quickly. "I stayed at your place for a week now, plus Mikey, Frank, and Ray were there too. We're even."

"Fine, but either way I'm paying rent. If I'm living here, I refuse to be here for free. It's not fair."

"Life's not fair. But I guess I can let you pitch in a little. But only because I know that you'll never shut up about it if I don't let you."

"Do you realize that we're talking about paying bills like it's a privelage?"

"It's better than most of the alternative conversations we could be having," he smiled and leaned towards me. I was expecting a quick kiss, but instead he pulled away again.

I went to sip my coffee and found a mint wrapper in it. I shot Gerard a dark look, and he merely shrugged.

"I didn't feel like walking all the way to the garbage, and you seemed to be really nursing that coffee. I assumed you didn't want it anymore."

I fished the wrapper out with a hooked finger and threw it at him. It bounced off his cheek, leaving a small droplet of liquid was left in its wake.

He leaned in and, this time, I felt his lips connect with mine. I knew he'd just ate the mint, because the taste was almost overpowering. I wiped his cheek clean and then kissed him again.

"Next time go easy on the mints."