I Never Told You What I Did for a Living

"Lily, Lily, Lily!"

The guys were all chanting my name as Ray filled a shotglass. It was so full that I didn't quite understand how it hadn't overflowed. I picked it up carefully between two fingers and brought it to my lips. The smell stung my nostrils, so I slammed it back without taking another breath. It burned all the way down, yet it was somehow sort of pleasant. Everyone cheered and Mikey clapped me on the back.

"Way to take it like a man, Lily."

"Thanks," I smiled, passing the shotglass to him. "Now it's your turn."

He shook his head. "I don't think so. Not tonight, Lily."

"Aw, come on! You have to celebrate with me, Mikey! It's my grad night!"

He sighed, unable to resist temptation any longer. "Fine. Pour it, Toro."

I clapped my hands in excitement, my head beginning to buzz. I watched as the glass traveled around the circle, each of the guys taking a shot in turn. When it reached Angela, she looked nervous.

"I can't. I'm driving home tonight."

"You can crash here. We don't have any extra beds, and the couches are all claimed, but you can always sleep on the floor," I invited.

"Come on, Angela," Kevin prodded. "It'll be fun. When's the last time you got drunk?"

Her eyes flickered toward Mikey for a split second. I looked over at him, too, but he seemed completely oblivious to her gaze. I looked back at Angela, who seemed to be weighing the pros and cons of my offer.

"Fine, we'll stay. I'll drink, but I still won't have any shots."

Instead of arguing with her, I reached out and stole her full shot. "Great, more for me." I took the shot and passed the glass to Kevin, who still hadn't had his shot.

It wasn't long before we had my stereo pulled into the living room and were blaring music. Mikey was flipping through my CD book, and the rest of us were playing drinking games. Mom and Dad were standing in the kitchen talking. I decided that it was time to bite the bullet and go join them.

"Hey," I greeted them as I walked in, sipping a drink.

"Congratulations, honey," Dad pulled me into a tight hug. When he released me, Mom stuck out her hand.

"It's Lily, right?"

My mood darkened considerably as I shook her outstretched hand. I turned back to Dad.

"So what's happening between you two these days?"

"I think we're going to be together, at least for now. The doctor said that she needs to be around things and people that were once familiar to her in a last effort to bring back her memory. I've been showing her photo albums and a bunch of momentos from your childhood, but so far nothing's worked. I think she may be this way forever."

"I've kind of accepted that fact, Dad. She's still my mother, she's just not my mom anymore."

"Don't say that, Lily. Things will eventually be normal again, I promise."

"When? You're acting like newlyweds again. Are you taking another chance with her?"

"So what if I am? She's become the person that I fell in love with again, Lily. Neither of us has had a serious relationship since the divorce, so it is wrong to want to give it another shot?"

"What happens when she finds out that you're not still the guy she fell in love with?"

Silence fell in the kitchen, and I downed the rest of my drink.

"Whatever," I muttered. "I'm over this. I wish you all the best with your new husband," I added with a phony smile to Mom. She thanked me quietly as I left the room and sat back at the table between Gerard and Frankie. "I need a new drink," I set my cup down in front of me, and Frank immediately poured me another.

Ray bounced a quarter off of the table and it landed neatly in a glass in the centre of the table. "Hmm... Lily drinks."

It soon became extremely clear that the point of the game was to get me wasted. It wasn't long before I was having trouble sitting up straight, and it was impossible for me to get the quarter anywhere near the cup.

"You okay?" Frankie asked as I felt my head loll to one side.

"I'm great," I smiled at him. "I'm celebrating."

"Yeah, I know, but do you think you've celebrated enough?"

"Nope," I brought my cup to my lips and turned it upside down. It was empty. "I need a refill."

"Lily, I think you need to go to bed," Gerard whispered in my ear.

"I don't think so."

"Are you sure?"

"All I need is another drink."

Gerard gave Frankie a look over my head, and Frank nodded.

"What was that?" I asked, spinning around to face Gerard. "What did you just tell him to do?"

"Nothing."

When I faced the table again, there was a full cup before me. I took a drink and made a sour face.

"It's just water."

"You'll thank us in the morning," Frank informed me as he placed a bottle of water in front of me as well.

Everyone else was still drinking, but suddenly the room began to spin. I leaned my head on Gerard's shoulder and put my arms around his neck.

"I think I need to lie down," I mumbled.

"Good idea," he laughed slightly as he stood up and pulled me up beside him. "Say goodnight, Lily."

"Goodnight! Thanks for coming to my party!"

As soon as Gerard began to lower me onto the bed, I felt sick. I leapt up and stumbled into the bathroom. I could feel Gerard lift my hair, then I began to get incredibly drowsy. He hauled me back into the bedroom, and I could hear him giving me instructions.

"Your water is right here on your nightstand. Drink a lot of it, okay? There's a pail right here on the floor. Can you grab it if you have to hurl again?"

"Yep," I grinned into the softness of my pillow. "Go have fun, okay?"

He tucked my hair behind my ear and kissed my forhead tenderly. "Get some rest. Happy graduation."