If I Was Perfect Then This Would Be Easy

"Feel that engine roar?" Chris winked in my direction, making me laugh.

Although Garver, Dom, Ami and Jimmy (I had no clue what his thing was) were pretty much against Nunez coming with me, my excitement made them change their minds.

Surely, once my brother and I saw ourselves with brand new cars, we felt like children again and I assumed that was the entire purpose of those particular gifts.

I was happy. For the first time in so long, my heart was racing with the feeling of pure joy. This obviously shocked everyone. Some of my friends watched me strangely, probably not understanding this side of mine, while others watched me with a small smile, as if watching their own kid smiling for the first time. I honestly didn't care what was going on or why on earth my Miami boys decided to buy me a car, when it was Jack who should have gotten all the attention.

"Oh yeah! I'm pimpin' with the sexiest guitarist ever!" Nunez yelled. I didn't hold back my laugh.

My heart pumped with excitement and pride. This was my car, something I had been dreaming about ever since I was a little kid.

Something tugged at my heart, however and it had a great deal to do with Brian's words before we left. Maybe there wasn't really the words that bothered me, but the tone he used and the way his eyes sparkled with hatred. Part of me wished he hadn't done that. Another part of me wanted him to burn in hell for everything: the false hopes he gave me, the way he used me, etcetera.

The car growled as I pressed the pedal in my anger and Chris - I almost forgot he was in the same car as I was - whistled as we passed a red convertible with two blondes in it.

"Woah, easy there, Desperado!"

"What? I thought you liked fast cars," I ventured defiantly.

A long pause followed and I could almost hear the wheels turning in both our heads. I wondered, though, what he was really thinking about.

"Damn, this was so worth it," Nunez decided with a smirk. I rolled my eyes, figuring he was talking about the girls winking at him from the cars passing us.

"Whatever, moron. I'm not paying attention to the sluts out there."

"Oh, I wasn't talking about those."

I made sure to not look at him as my cheeks caught fire. He was smirking that signature Nunez smirk, no doubt.

"You still do that, huh?"

I shot the defiant man a confused glare. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Blushing, ya know." He watched me patiently, expecting my next move.

"I do that a lot." It had been quite a while since I had had such conversation with Chris and the two of us alone in a speeding car seemed like the best moment for it - at least to him, it did.

He snickered. "Oh, I'm sure you do. Just like you did back then."

The car came to an abrupt halt in a nearly empty parking lot. Making sure I turned off the engine and grabbed my keys, I got out of the brand new Camaro and started walking. Sure enough, he followed.

"I take it you threw it all away, huh? No one knows, right?" There was silence. He huffed. "Of course! Figured you'd do that. You went with the flow and then moved, leaving everything behind."

Again, silence. I looked around at the street. Darkness began setting in and the Huntington Beach night life was starting to show up.

"Oh look, Starbucks. Let's head over." My voice lacked any emotion. I had no business in Starbucks on a Friday evening! Chris knew it, too, but he remained silent until we ordered something to drink and sat down - I was shocked he did so.

"Was it worth it?"

The tension had built up a hell of a lot and I found myself suffocating in all the stress. Of all days, he had to pick this one to dig up the past.

"What do you think, Chris? Was it fucking worth it?" I threw my hands around me, as if the coffee shop represented my current life.

His face fell. "It looks like it is."

"Well it is, Chris, it is. It's absolutely fucking fantastic!"

Awkward silence again. This time, it wasn't annoyance that I felt, but guilt. Even though I knew Nunez was an asshole and it was his fault things had gone wrong back in the days, I still felt like there were things left unsaid.

"And I didn't run away," I finally spoke up.

I felt his gaze now on me. When I looked up, Chris leaned on his elbows, his face now closer to me. He must have sensed my stress. I knew he didn't drop the subject by the look in his eyes.

"It wasn't that bad, was it?" Persistent bastard.

"No." My eyes shot open at the realization of what I had just said. "Chris, we can't be together. I mean, come on, you hook up with every chick that falls in your way. You're not made for dedication."

"And you are?" he questioned with a quirked eyebrow. I hesitated. "You used to be the same a while ago."

I wondered how accurate he was in this statement. There was a time when I hated getting involved in a relationship, but now I just wanted a guy who would dedicate himself to me and I to him.Just like Brian had.

And now I sat there in a fucking Starbucks with one of the hottest guys I knew, whom I was attracted to and was hitting on me and I was telling him off? What the hell was wrong with me?

"You know what, we don't have to talk about that. But what happened back then really meant something to me." I glared at Chris, who surrendered. "Done."

"Thank you," I muttered.

"Alright, how about we head out?"

There was no need in me answering him, because by the time I even opened my mouth, he had already dragged me outside and towards the car.

***
Third Person POV

The room seemed to lack air as Brian sat on the leather couch. The day's events - although few - had worn him off. He knew acting the way he did was right, his brain told him so, but what he couldn't understand was why it felt so hard.

The door to his house slammed open and in walked Jimmy.

"Yo, Gates! Where'd you been, man? You left so soon."

"How come you're not wasted?" Brian laughed bitterly, honestly shocked by his friend's soberness.

Jimmy quirked his eyebrow, noticing the pessimistic aura around his old friend.

"Yeah, well I decided to pass tonight. Went to a Starbucks..." The way The Rev said those words made Brian look up and watch him expectantly, tension building in his chest. There was something the drummer was trying to say, but didn't know how to.

"What?"

"Well...I saw someone at that Starbucks." Again, Jimmy's tone held hesitation.

Brian started laughing. "Oh, I see! Don't worry, man, I'm not telling Leana. Hot chick with license to be fucked?" He took another sip of his beer.

"No, Lexa and Nunez."

Apart from the horrible coughs coming from Brian's side, caused by nearly suffocating with his drink, there was no other sound.

"So...what?" Syn attempted to speak. Jimmy played cool and gave no answer, but watched his friend as he tried to seem careless. He failed. "It's not like...I care, or something."

"Sure," was Rev's simple reply and turned to grab a drink himself.

"So, uh, what were they doing?" Again, the attempt at seeming nonchalant was beyond terrible and Jimmy smirked at that.

"Talking, holding hands."

Brian froze. "Oh."

"Maybe they'll hook up, who knows. But it's not like it should interest you. I mean, you do have a particular way to hate the poor girl."

The phrase caught Brian off guard and he stared at Jimmy for a second before responding.

"Poor girl? Jimmy, seriously, you're taking her side?"

Jim narrowed his eyes and watched a now annoyed Brian throw the remote control on the couch.

"I'm not taking her side, I just think the way you acted and still are is shitty, dude!"

"Shitty? No, let me tell what is shitty!" Brian's nostrils flared and he watched Jimmy with a new found anger. "Shitty is when your fucking girlfriend turns out to be a fucking liar and doesn't mean a single word she says! Shitty is when someone else sees her with another guy and when someone else hears her talk shit on me!"

The yelling reached Pinkly's little ears and the dog came running in the living room, barking the entire time. It fell silent, however, when seeing its owner in his current state.

Brian felt like he was finally letting out part of the anger that had gathered up over the past months, while Jimmy simply stared dumbfounded at him.

"What are you talking about?"

"Nothing, man. Just drop it."

"Shit no, I ain't dropping it!"

The two men faced each other again, both like players set on their goals. One set to defend his friend, the other set to make others see the evil hidden behind the mask of that friend.

"So she was your girlfriend? Since when, Brian, since when? You never even fucking told her that, not even mentioned it to her! You asshole! And who the fuck told you she did those things?"

"Someone." The way those words rolled out of Brian's mouth made Jimmy froze. He knew then who that 'someone' was and couldn't have been more angry.

"Just let her have her fun with whatever douche she wants!" Brian continued. "I don't fucking care!"

And just like that, one of the players had set a new goal.