The pain of just your simple touch
Just Like I Predicted Only Better
I looked into his eyes, and he looked into mine. I leaned in and kissed him.
“Yes Frank, I will.” I whispered, kissing him again. His lips curved into a smile, and I pulled away. He stuck out his lip pouting like a little kid.
“C’mon I’m starved, we can get more coffee too.” I smiled and winked at him, I pulled him off the swing he was perched on. There was a little coffee shop across from the park, I got a bagel and a coffee, and he just got a coffee. We paid separately; I had managed to pocket some money before I left my moms, and we finished our meals in silence. I let out a sigh accidentally, and he looked up at me with a glint in his eye. I smiled at him, but he just looked back down at his empty cup.
“Rina, its 7:45. We should probably go…” he was so quiet, and it drove me crazy, I wanted him to talk, to be all lovey-dovey like he was, but now, now his dad was back and emotion was forbidden.
Just like I predicted, only better, less than a week, and right after he asked you out. Poor little girl, I’m sure you wont go back to your cutting or other habits, oh yes, the habits, wouldn’t want me to let him find out about the drugs or the booze, no, cause then, then you’d be just as bad as his father, only instead of the illegal drunken lust, you’ll be leading him on with drunken fake love, only difference, his father shattered his spirit, something that can be fixed, you, you’ll shatter his hear which takes so much time, and I’m sure he wont wait for it to be fixed before he kills himself, and it will be all you’re fault and you’ll have to live with me and you’re guilty conscience. Oh wait, I rid you of that insect long ago, just like I rid you of that pathetic excuse for a voice of reason.
“O.k… Frankie, please talk to me, I know you don’t feel like talking right now, but please, it’s killing me to know you're hurting, and that I cant help you when I love you so much…” I said, tears burning at the edge of my eye, trying to escape.
“I’m sorry Rina, but I just keep dreading what will happen and what’s happened is running through my head, I’m sorry if I’m being quiet, but I’m afraid I’ll start crying, and
I’ve always been hurt more if I cried.” He looked away, he couldn’t even look me in the eye he because he knew I would see his emotion, I wanted to see it so badly. I wanted to see I was hurt to, but when I lifted his chin to look into his eyes, there was nothing, no emotion, just a few tears before they closed.
“Yes Frank, I will.” I whispered, kissing him again. His lips curved into a smile, and I pulled away. He stuck out his lip pouting like a little kid.
“C’mon I’m starved, we can get more coffee too.” I smiled and winked at him, I pulled him off the swing he was perched on. There was a little coffee shop across from the park, I got a bagel and a coffee, and he just got a coffee. We paid separately; I had managed to pocket some money before I left my moms, and we finished our meals in silence. I let out a sigh accidentally, and he looked up at me with a glint in his eye. I smiled at him, but he just looked back down at his empty cup.
“Rina, its 7:45. We should probably go…” he was so quiet, and it drove me crazy, I wanted him to talk, to be all lovey-dovey like he was, but now, now his dad was back and emotion was forbidden.
Just like I predicted, only better, less than a week, and right after he asked you out. Poor little girl, I’m sure you wont go back to your cutting or other habits, oh yes, the habits, wouldn’t want me to let him find out about the drugs or the booze, no, cause then, then you’d be just as bad as his father, only instead of the illegal drunken lust, you’ll be leading him on with drunken fake love, only difference, his father shattered his spirit, something that can be fixed, you, you’ll shatter his hear which takes so much time, and I’m sure he wont wait for it to be fixed before he kills himself, and it will be all you’re fault and you’ll have to live with me and you’re guilty conscience. Oh wait, I rid you of that insect long ago, just like I rid you of that pathetic excuse for a voice of reason.
“O.k… Frankie, please talk to me, I know you don’t feel like talking right now, but please, it’s killing me to know you're hurting, and that I cant help you when I love you so much…” I said, tears burning at the edge of my eye, trying to escape.
“I’m sorry Rina, but I just keep dreading what will happen and what’s happened is running through my head, I’m sorry if I’m being quiet, but I’m afraid I’ll start crying, and
I’ve always been hurt more if I cried.” He looked away, he couldn’t even look me in the eye he because he knew I would see his emotion, I wanted to see it so badly. I wanted to see I was hurt to, but when I lifted his chin to look into his eyes, there was nothing, no emotion, just a few tears before they closed.