There's Beauty in a Breakdown

I quickly readjusted myself, blushing furiously. I couldn’t believe I was blushing – I just simply don’t blush!!! I sneaked a look at James, hoping against all odds that he wouldn’t notice – but the self satisfied smirk told me he had. Damn him and his observational skills!!!

“Looking for someone?” He asked politely, raising one eyebrow, attempting to hide his smirk and not really succeeding. I do wish that my heart wouldn’t leap inappropriately every time he does. Smile that is – not, not succeeding. That would just be rather weird...

“Kayla?” I only responded when James waved his hand in front of my face and almost immediately fell backwards. Balance wasn’t my greatest skill in the world.

“I...” I looked up at him, unsure where to begin. Should feelings come first? Or events...
“Um...” I tried to think of something reasonably intelligent to say. But the words wouldn’t form what so ever. Instead James spoke,

“Look Kayla, I know you want tell me what shit happened to you, but...I want to know. I want to get to know you...” He scratched his head, and turned a rally cute shade of pink. “Fuck...” He mumbled, and shot a shy grin at me, “Saying this to the mirror was a lot easier.” I couldn’t help but let a giggle out.

Why was he so darn cute?!?!

He sighed and stared at the floor, “I guess... What I’m trying to say is...”

“Do you wanna grab a coffee sometime?” I hated to see boys suffering when they tried to ask girls out. But I’d had this dilemma before, and I tried to be nice by asking him out and the guy was trying to tell me he was gay! Not my finest moment I have to admit...

“Coffee... Yes...” James breathed a sigh of relief. “Sounds like a good idea.” He smiled and I felt as though the butterflies in my stomach did not only start fluttering but started having a full on fluttering rave. I did hate the affect he had on my sometimes. But only sometimes. Most of the time I secretly quite enjoyed it, but let’s not go down that deeply innocent-destroying road.

I smiled and turned to go, thankful that I had at least got something from all my running. I hadn’t run in years, and unfortunately my body could tell and deeply protested.

“Wait!” James’ arm shot out and grabbed my wrist. I jumped at his touch and he immediately pulled it back. “Sorry...” I shrugged, hoping that on the outside it didn’t bother me. But the truth was that no one had really touched me for three years. You’d kinda freak too if some insanely hot, cute, charming, funny... dreamy...

“I was just going to ask what time and when?”

“Gorgeous...” I immediately clamped my hand over my mouth. I didn’t just say that out loud. I didn’t just say that out loud! But James’ expression told me I had.

“Huh?” I floundered desperately.

“Gorgeous – you know, as in good?” He just looked at me. Ok, just move on I thought to myself, “when had you in mind?” It was a bad attempt but I couldn’t think of anything else at the time ok?! James looked at me weirdly and I didn’t blame him.

“Next Saturday? 3ish?” He said, deciding not to pursue the matter (thank the Lord) I nodded enthusiastically. Probably too enthusiastically.

“Sounds good” I smiled at him for an unknown period of time before finally coming to my senses and turned to go.

“Gorgeous.” James said and I winced and turned my head to see him grinning a smirk (if such a feat was possible) and I scowled and stuck my tongue out at him.

Sometimes I thought I had a rubbish taste in men.