Light In The Darkness

I woke the next morning in the cradle of Cole's chest. I couldn’t help but smile. Cole was so perfect. Cole's arm tightened around my waist and I turned slightly towards him. "Morning," he smiled and I smiled back.
"How long have you been awake?" I asked.
"A while," he said and thrills ran along my skin. "I could watch you forever." I smiled and turned my body round towards his. His hand settled on my waist and his forehead rested against mine.
"I...want to say something but I don’t know how..."I said softly.
"Just say it, baby," he whispered.
"Thank you for last night," I whispered. "You were perfect."
"I wanted it to be perfect for you," he said softly and I smiled.
"It was," I assured him. "I love you."
"I love you, too," he said tenderly and kissed me gently. I then hugged into his chest and rested my head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around me.
"When do you start work?" I asked him as my fingers skimmed lightly over his chest.
"When the new year starts," he shrugged. "September time." I nodded. September was next month and I wanted to make the most of this time. The time where we can do anything we want all day. I smiled and kissed Cole's chest.
"I could stay here all day," I said and settled tightly against Cole.
"Good, because you're going to," he whispered and I laughed.
"I should probably go home," I said, not wanting to. "To change."
"I want you to stay," Cole said as he stroked my arm softly. I smiled and nodded.
"I want to as well," I said and completely forgot about going home and just spent the day in bed with Cole. I couldn’t think of a better way to spend the day.

Over the next few days I only went back to my house once to get some clothes, because Cole wanted me to stay with him, and I had no objections. We spent all day and night together, either at his house, in the park or in the cafe. I knew Les was happy for me, that I had found someone who cared about me. I guessed that maybe he had known I wasn’t as happy as I had pretended to be before I met Cole. "Cole," I said one evening. I was sitting next to him on the sofa and his arm was curled around my shoulders protectively. "Have you ever been in love before?" I turned to him and tried to gage his response by the way his body changed, but it didn't.
"No," he said after some thought which worried me slightly. "I thought I was once. But it was nothing to what I feel compared to you. When I was at school, I was in a relationship with a girl called Beccy. We were together about 3 years but she didn't want to leave the city, and I did. We decided to end it because if we fight about where we live, we will fight about much more. I thought I was in love with her but then I met you...and my whole idea of love changed." I smiled softly. "Why did you want to know?"
"I was just wondering," I shrugged. "I've never been in love before, never been close. Guys always avoided me when I was a teenager because I was different. I just wondered what it would be like to have been in love before. Because I never expected to fall in love and then I did with you and I didn't know...I had nothing to compare it to. I know in my heart that this is special, amazing, but it would have been nice to have another relationship which didn't work to...enforce how amazing this is."
"I don’t think you need one to compare it to," Cole said as he stroked my arm tenderly. "I think you never being in love before is amazing. It's like you were saved for me. No guy ever hurt you and now no one will, because I would rather die than hurt you." Shivers ran over my skin and I smiled and closed my eyes as I leant against Cole's chest.
"Do you...think badly of me because of what I said?" I asked worriedly.
"What? No! Of course not," he said certainly. "I could never think badly of you. It's natural and you're just being normal. To be honest, I compare this relationship to my one with Beccy."
"And what do you realise?" I asked softly.
"That this one is much better, much more likely to stay," he whispered and I grinned against his chest.
"I love you," I said as I kissed his chest over his shirt.
"I love you, too," he said and kissed the top of my head tenderly.

Even though after that incident, with two weeks left before Cole started work, we decided that we should start seeing each other less, so that when the term starts it won't be a huge shock when we can't spend the day together. I wanted desperately to spend all of my time with Cole but knew it was best if we spent a little time of the day apart. For the first time in weeks, Cole took me home after spending the day together. He came in and we sat on the sofa for a while, but too soon Cole sighed and said that he should be getting home. "I'll see you tomorrow, right?" he asked and I grinned.
"Of course," I smiled.
"Hey, you have a lot of post piled up," Cole noted as he went to the front door. I smiled weakly.
"I don’t know why people insist on sending me post..." I sighed.
"I can help you with it if you want," he said and I smiled.
"I'd love that, but maybe tomorrow? I'm too tired to go through it right now," I said.
"Sure," Cole said and I heard him lay the papers down on the table. "I'll see you in the morning." I nodded and he leant down and kissed me tenderly. "Bye, baby." Then he was gone and I felt completely alone. I frowned at the loss of his large, warm body and went upstairs.

I got changed into a pair of shorts and a vest top and climbed into bed. I lay wide-eyed staring into the darkness, willing a certain shining form to appear. But it didn't. I sighed and eventually fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning.

The next morning, Cole let himself into my house and found me upstairs still in bed. "Still in bed?" he asked and I smiled. I didn't realise how much I had missed him until I heard him.
"I didn't sleep well last night," I shrugged and climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom.
"Me neither," Cole sighed as he followed me. "I don’t know how I can cope when I go to work."
"You'll be ok, you'll be distracted by kids," I said as I splashed my face with cool water. "I'll be the one sitting around waiting for you." I knew I sounded bitter and I put my hands on either side of the sink and sighed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound...I am happy for you, I really am. I just..." I didn't know how to say it. Cole came over to be and hugged me from behind.
"I know, it's ok," he said softly and I leant my head back against his chest. We were still for a few moments and then Cole kissed my cheek and said, "so, let's sort out your post." I smiled and nodded.

We went downstairs and on the way Cole picked up the pile of letters. "Your messaging machine is flashing as well," he said.
"Can you press the white button?" I asked as I sat on the sofa. I heard a beep as Cole sat next to me and the machine started talking.
"You have 4 new messages," it said and I laughed.
"I'm away for weeks and I only have four messages..." I shook my head and then continued to listen. The first two messages were blank and the third was from Les.
"Hey, honey, I was just checking up on you, but I guess you're with Cole. I'll speak to you soon. Bye." I frowned slightly as I realised that I hadn’t spoken to Les or Kim that much recently and felt a stab of guilt. I vowed I would phone them when we had finished sorting my things out. The last message started playing and I froze.
"Miss Simons, I'm sure you don’t remember me. My name is Doctor Reece. I told you several years ago that we would keep looking into your problem and I am glad to announce that we may have found a solution. If you would please return this message on 00000 000000 we would be happy to talk to you and schedule an appointment. Thank you." I stared at down at the floor for what felt like ages as her message soaked in. Then I turned to Cole unsure as to my feelings and what I should do.