Feels Like Home

"Do you think there is one person out there for everyone?" Adrienne Nesser asked her boyfriend Billie Joe Armstrong. They laid on the roof of Adrienne's mom's house on their backs, the comforter from Adrienne's bed wrapped around them as they stared up at the stars on a cool night.

Billie Joe continued to curl a stray piece of Adrienne's dark hair around his finger as he thought. "I hope so." He said softly. "I think so." He looked at her with green eyes that glittered in the moonlight. His brown hair was twisted into dredlocks. Very punk rock, which was what he was.

Billie Joe was a punk rocker from California. He was in Adrienne's hometown of Minneapolis just passing through. They had been dating off and on for the few years while Billie Joe went touring with his band Green Day around the country. The arrangement wasn't the most convenient, but it worked for them. Adrienne knew that no matter how much she missed him when he was gone, she loved him more.

"I hope so too." She told him before she leaned in to kiss him on the lips. He was so different from the other guys she knew, yet he was so normal to her. He liked to do things his way, just like she did; and that way was often Adrienne's way of doing things.

When they broke apart, Billie Joe said "I love you," ever so softly to her.

"I love you too." Adrienne grinned for a moment but it melted away. "Do you have to go tomorrow?"

Billie Joe nodded. "Yeah. Tre's uncle died so he needs to be with his family and my sister's getting married so I have to be there and Mike just wants to sleep in his bed. I wish you could come with me."

"I do too, but I have midterms and you know I can't skip out on that." Adrienne reminded him as she snuggled closer to him, the wind was getting bitterly cold the longer they stayed out there. She was studying sociology at the local college. She eventually wanted to work at a company and climb the cooperate ladder.

"I know." Billie Joe, his voice slightly whiny. "I just don't know when I'll be around here again." He took her cold hand and chaffed it with his own. His words came out in little puffs of steam in the air. "I don't want to loose you."

"You won't." Adrienne assured him. "I'll wait for you."

"And I'll come back for you." Billie Joe promised.

He kissed her to seal his promise.

When they broke apart, Billie Joe had a cruel grin on his face. "You are so beautiful... to meeee "

"Billie Joe shut up " Adrienne hissed at her boyfriend who had sat up and began to sing the traditional love song at the top of his lungs and very out of key. Billie Joe had a naturally beautiful voice but he was throwing it off on purpose. The neighbor's lights came on next door.

"Can't you see? You're everything I hoped for..."

"Hey buddy, shut the hell up I'm trying to sleep "

"Shut the fuck up I'm singing to my girl dammit " Billie Joe yelled back.

"Billie Joe just shut up You'll wake my mom up and then she'll make you leave." Adrienne laughed. It was funny to see Billie Joe get into a verbal war with her grumpy next door neighbor but she would rather his attention be on her.

"What?" He asked innocently. "I love you and I want everyone to know it." He kissed her again, relishing the feel of her lips, knowing it would be a long time before he felt them again. When they broke apart, Billie Joe rested his forehead against hers. "I walk this empty street, on the boulevard of broken dreams."

Thirty-five year old Adrienne Nesser woke with a start. Her radio alarm was going off and it was playing a song sung by the man she was so desperately trying to forget. She roughly turned the alarm off and then froze. Her three year old daughter, Sydney, was still asleep at her side, unwoken by the song or the slam.

Adrienne ran a hand through her disheveled hair. She peeked through the curtains to see thick clouds, it was not going to be a pretty day. Adrienne got out the bed quietly, put on her robe, and went downstairs, the song still echoing in her head.

It was strange how she was dreamt about Billie Joe and he was the one who woke her up. She had that dream at least once every other week now that she was back at the place where it happened. It was a scene from the last time she ever saw Billie Joe in person again. He went back to California the next day, and didn't even stop by to tell her goodbye. She never saw him again. He broke his promise.

She waited for him, just like she promised, but he never came for her. Six years ago, she got tired of waiting and married a guy named David. Two years ago, after they had had two kids, Adrienne caught David cheating on her with her co-worker from the company she worked at. Adrienne filed for divorce and lost her job because her co-worker was the boss' daughter and didn't want Adrienne around anymore.

"Morning honey," Her mother said when she saw her come down the stairs. Her mother was headed out the door to go to work. Adrienne came back to live with her mother after she and David got the divorce. Every corner had a memory of Billie Joe and on some days, it was too much to bear.
"Morning Mom. I'll see you later tonight." Adrienne fixed a cup of coffee as the door closed and a car was heard leaving the driveway. With her mug in hand, Adrienne went back upstairs, took a shower and got dressed for work. She was now a psychology and sociology teacher at a local high school. She went into a room that used to be her brothers'. "Wake up Joey. It's time to go to school." She nudged the five year old awake.

"I don't wanna go to school." He yawned as he buried his face in the pillow.

"I don't care cause you're gonna." Adrienne mocked as she threw the covers off of him. "Get dressed."

Adrienne left the room to wake Sydney and to get her dressed. This was not how she imagined her life to be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"He better not be in here." Mike Dirnt muttered as he put the keycard in the slot of a hotel door. He and his band mate Tre' Cool had been waiting downstairs for the other member of their group to make face, Billie Joe Armstrong for the past thirty minutes. They had a sound check for their Minneapolis promotion show for the new album 'American Idiot' in just over an hour and he was nowhere to be found. They needed an early one because Jason White, their alternate guitarist, may not be able to be there due to family issues.

The tiny light on the door clicked green and allowed Mike into the room. Mike wrinkled his nose at the mess of clothes, empty bottles, cigarette butts and joints all over the floor and furniture. "This is getting out of control." He muttered viciously to himself as he made his way to the bedroom section of the suit.

He found the missing guitarist on the bed asleep, his girlfriend of the moment next to him and they were both naked, the sheets barely on them. The room smelled of marijuana and there was a hint of crack on the table next to the bed. "Billie Joe." He said in a loud authoritative voice.

Billie Joe didn't move.

"Billie Joe " Mike tried again louder. Billie Joe still didn't move. "That's it." Mike muttered as he swore under his breath. He stalked to the drapes that were covering the large picture window and flung them open. The effect would have been more dramatic if thick clouds weren't preventing the sun to shine. Mike went into the bathroom and filled a cup with cold water and splashed it on Billie Joe without shame.

"What the fuck " Billie Joe yelled as the icy liquid hit his skin.

"We have a sound check in less than an hour Billie Joe get up. Shit, you're..ugh." Mike was too frustrated to even finish his sentence.

"What? I'm what?" Billie Joe yelled after him, not caring that his raised voice was affecting his partner's sleep.

"You're a fucking drunk Billie Joe and your addicted to everything. You need help." Mike yelled.

"I am not. I don't need any of that shit, I'm fine." Billie Joe snapped, his eyes glistening with anger.

"Whatever." Mike said disbelievingly. "You're not fine when you can barely make your way to the stage because you're so drunk or high. You're not fine when you have to drink two bottles of vodka just to get to sleep. You're not fine when you need to snort crack to get horny. You're nothing Billie Joe. Be downstairs in ten or we're leaving you."

"You can't leave me " Billie Joe yelled at Mike's retreating back. "You'd be nothing without me " He finished after the door was slammed shut.

"Mmm, baby, you ready for a go?" A busty blonde let her hands wander on Billie Joe, her naked body pressed up against his.

Billie Joe shrugged her off. "No Caylyn, I have sound check." He stalked into the bathroom area and looked at himself in the mirror. His eyes were deeply set with heavy under-eye baggage. He was pale and looked sickly and gross. He had never married nor did he have any children. This was not what he imagined his life to be.