The Unattainable

Reagan’s POV

Dad just had a talk with me, which left me feeling ridiculously happy, but also slightly confused.
He told me he was going on tour in two weeks.
Two fucking weeks! on a European tour!
I mean, couldn’t he have told me sooner?
But then he told me something shocking - I’m going with him for the first leg of the tour!
And he told me I can bring a friend, too.
That obviously means Ami - doesn’t he know she’s my only real friend?
But then again, maybe he just didn’t want to presume?
I told him I wanted Ami to come, and he seemed happy about this, maybe because they’ve been getting along really well recently, just like I planned. I love seeing them both happy, and they seem to be when they’re talking, so I’m really glad they’re friends.
But then he realized he had to tell Ami that he was taking us on tour with Slipknot, and what about her job and everything else, and all of that crap, but I know she could just ask for a holiday from work, it’s not like they even need her much; but then I realized something else, something it seemed he had already thought about.
She didn’t know he was in Slipknot.
He was going to have to shatter her illusion, et c.
And even though I knew she wouldn’t care too much, it might be hard with her to deal with that we were touring with her all-time favourite band.
So now he’s gone to tell her
And I’m anxiously waiting to hear her reaction.

Ami’s POV

“Ami, love, I have something to tell you…” I hear behind me, making my heart pause for a second.
No, I shouldn’t presume the worst, I shouldn’t presume that he’s going to say that last night was a mistake, that he doesn’t want to go out with me, and that he never though of me as anything more than a slightly attractive friend, and his little girl’s best friend.
“Wh… what’s that?” I whisper, not facing him yet, much too afraid to be able to look at his face
“Uhm, sit down? It might come as a bit of a shock,” he says nervously, so I do as he ordered without another word. “Ami, I’m going on tour in two weeks,” he say slowly, and my head shoots up immediately, he what?
“Joey, what? I don’t understand? You’re going on tour, on tour doing what, exactly? Murderdolls are on hiatus, and you don’t work in anything other than music which requires touring, and what about Reagan?” I say, my confusion mounting as he fidgets nervously, as I remember that Reagan is sometimes home alone - could I be finding out the reason why?
“She’s coming with, and so are you,” Joey says , looking into my eyes - it wasn’t a question, it was a statement - and I know, as does he that I wouldn’t say no to him anyway, but that hasn’t answered the rest of my question? “And no, you’re right, it’s not with Murderdolls, and it is to do with music. I’m going on tour with Slipknot.” he finishes, answering my question boldly, truthfully. If it was anyone else I would call them a liar, but not him, not when he said it like that.
“Slipknot? You’re touring with fucking Slipknot? Why?” I ask, trying to be as calm as possible, and not knowing what else to say
“Because…” Joey doesn’t answer straight away, he looks as if he doesn’t want to tell me something, but knows he needs to, “Because I’m their drummer, number 1, the founding member, that’s me.” he mumbles, and I pause for a while, trying to let what he had just said sink in.
Joey, My Joey, is In Slipknot, my favourite band, he is going on tour with them, he is their drummer, he is my idol, he is my… boyfriend, and he is my best friend’s dad.
Does what he had just said make any difference to me?
Does it matter that he’s famous, successful, and in one of the worlds most famous [or infamous, depending on how you look at it] metal bands?
Does it change who he was, and still is to me?
Not one Iota.
“Are you telling me the truth, not joking with me, not messing me around?” I finally ask him, already knowing the answer that he is about to give
“I’m serious,” he replies, looking me in the eye.
“Okay,” I nod, letting it really sink in
“Does this change anything? Between us, I mean?” he asks, looking at the ground
“No, Joey, not one bit, not at all, in fact, I’m happier that I didn’t know, because to be honest, I’m sure you wouldn’t have shown me the real you, the Joey Jordison the press never see, the man behind the mask, the Joey I've fallen for. You wouldn’t have been the same with me, I know that, even though I would have been just the same with you, regardless of how much I bloody idolize you,” I blush at that “You would have seen me as someone else, just a fan, leeching off you, trying to get at you, to hurt you, which you now know I’d never do.” I try and finish, feeling I’ve left so many things unsaid, yet said everything I need to all at the same time.
Joey nods slowly, understanding me. I walk towards him slowly, and reach for his hand.
I pull it towards me and kiss it “I don’t care who you are on stage, I don’t care about who you are in the press, I don’t care about anything, so long as you’re always only yourself to me,” Oh Jesus, I feel cheesy now I’ve said that, but it seemed like the right thing to say when I opened my mouth… “Uhm… that came out wrong?” I squeak “I meant to say that just so long as you still treat me the same, then I’m hardly going to change how I feel about you,” I say, thinking that that was what I’ve been trying to say all along. and had been failing at, while making myself sound like a bucket of cheese!
“I understand, Ami, and I won’t treat you any differently now you know, I get why you think I would, but if you know anything about me by now, you should know that I’m not like that” Joey states, sedately. I nod, feeling embarrassed. we wait in that position for a few minutes, until I look up at him and notice that there is a slight smile playing on his lips, and I laugh, making him grin and begin to tickle me, I squeak and he leans down to kiss me.
I feel like I’m walking on air. Seriously, I know, cheesy again, but the way he kisses me just makes me realize even more that he’s all I could ever want in a guy, he makes me so happy, and I feel like I’m going to explode whenever his lips touch mine.
I know what I’m feeling is love, I really do. Even though it’s only been just over 2 months, but you have to understand that I’ve been living with Joey and Ami throughout all that time period, and I spend so much time with him, I really do. Sure, you may think this is all coming on so quickly, but I feel like I now know everything there is to know about him, and what I feel for him isn’t just some sort of crush.
I kiss him back passionately, until I hear a slight noise. I jump backwards, and he laughs and hugs me, holding me close as he pats my back and I lean my head on his shoulder and think about how much my life has changed in the past 2 months.
I suddenly think back to that noise.
Had I seen a flash of black hair near the door, or was it just Joeys?
I get nervous, now
Had someone seen us?