I Don't Wanna Be in Love

As Ember reached closer to Matt’s house her pain of what she had just done to Jacoby died down, excitement building itself up. She parked a block away, redid her makeup and removed any traces of eyeliner and mascara that found its way down her cheeks. After making sure everything looked okay she put the car back into drive and drove the rest of the block to Matt’s.

Nervously she parks her car in his drive, behind his car and then takes a few minutes to gain some composure. After a mental pep talk, Ember gets out of her car, leaving it unlock incase of a quick escape was needed.

“Hi,” She practiced on the way here and now she says it after knocking on his door. In a matter of seconds he answers it, he seen her pull up and was waiting for her to just walk up to the door.

“Hello,” He beams, slipping to the side to let her through the doorway. After closing the door he leads her to the living room where they both take a seat on the mini couch. They’re facing each other; legs crossed with an arm each resting on the couch arms. “How was your day?” He asks, and after his visit with Val he’s a little unsure what he wants her answer to be.

“It was…out of the ordinary...” She says, looking at him almost intensely, looking for any signs that he doesn’t want this. “But in a fine way, I mean everything is okay.”

“So...” He starts but can’t really bring himself to finish the sentence.

So you left your boyfriend right? You no longer have to feel guilty for kissing me, being attracted to me and wanting this? Yeah that just wouldn’t sound right.

“Yeah, it’s over. He took it okay…” She lies. “We haven’t been the way I wanted to be in a long time, he felt that too.” Matt really didn’t need to know how she did it, as long as she did it. And why would he care if Jacoby was alright, right? But does Ember care if he’s alright?

“So you’re free to see whoever you want…” He states, his sentence fades as his eyes concentrate on the soft shade of her lips.

“Yepp,” She whispers, her teeth clinging to her bottom lip in a tug. She sees him eying her lips and can’t fight the giggle that works up in throat.

All of her bad feelings seem to have just melted away, no more guilt or shame, no more fear of not being able to control her actions and risk hurting Jacoby. She’s now free to indulge her feelings in Matt. She leans against the gap that’s between them, it’s quite small, and she presses her lips against his very lightly. Just to get a small taste and to feel that airy feeling she got the last times she had kissed him.

After she pulls away and leans back against the arm of the couch Matt’s smarter thoughts catch up to him. He might as well get this out before he forgets and possibly ruins something that could be somewhat marvelous.

“Ember,” He starts, taking one of her small hands into his. His fingers stroke her knuckles affectionately and her heart stops. He doesn’t want this? Flashes across her mind but he continues and that thought freezes, she’s getting ahead of herself. “I want this, I want you but I want to take it slow. I’d like to get to know you a little better and let you have some time before you just rush into this. I don’t want you to feel like you’ve made a mistake or anything, you know? You were in this really long relationship and I don’t feel it’d be right if we just jumped in to this.”

For a moment Ember is speechless, she never considered that. “Awe,” She breathes, leaving over and taking Matt off guard by hugging him. “Thank you,” She whispers against his shoulder.

“You’re welcome,” He replies back in the same tone of whisper. “I’m glad that’s okay with you.”

“Of course,”

“And you don’t feel screwed or anything for ending your relationship with your ex? In case this isn’t a sure thing…” He asks, that thought had formed when he really gave this thought some thinking. If she felt that way he wasn’t sure what he was going to do.

“No, not at all, that makes it completely easier to get to know you. I’ll be able to give it one hundred percent.” Matt smiles, his heart beats just a little faster but she doesn’t know that. She pulls away and tucks a stray hair behind her ear, locking eyes with Matt.

They seem to sit there staring at one another for a really long time; about twenty minutes pass before either of them say anything. They decide on going out for a pizza and renting a movie. You can learn some serious things about a future partner by what movies they watch and what toppings are on their pizza.

After a long afternoon and night, two movies and serious conversation, Ember decides it’s late enough and checks out of Matt’s house and into a hotel room. Tomorrow morning they have a breakfast date.

“That went so well,” She says to herself as she plops down on the twin bed that’s fitted with blue sheets. “I’m glad I did this,” Her face is lit with new excitement and happiness. She’s in bliss with the new peachy feeling Matt emits off whenever he’s around or whenever they talk…or whenever she thinks of him. And she’s really excited to get to know him better and to give this her all. “And if worse case scenario…our chemistry dies or I don’t like who he is after I get to know him…I’ll go back and make things work with Jacoby.” She mumbles to herself, thinking out loud. But that thought instantly fades to black and not another thought of Jacoby erupts in her mind as she wafts to sleep.