Enigma

“So are we all invited?” Courtney asked as she set the table for dinner.

“Yeah, we’re all invited to the wedding.” I replied as I turned to go upstairs. I still hadn’t changed from my uniform.

Courtney opened her mouth to say something, but I quickly ran away, eager to be out of the stiff folds of clothing.

“Are they having an engagement party?” Courtney continued when I returned.

“Yes, and we are all invited to that as well.” Ever since she had found out about the impending wedding, Courtney had been hounding me with questions.

“Hmm, so I’m going to need two new outfits.”

I laughed loudly. “So that’s what you’ve been thinking about.”

“Got a problem with it?” She snapped and sat down heavily at the table.

“Come on girls, eat up.” Mum placed the food on the table and everyone reached forwards at once. It was a scramble for a few moments before everything was settled and we began to eat.

“When is the actual wedding?” Dad asked.

“Um, not sure, I think they were thinking of having it in a couple of months.” I frowned as I chewed on the food. “They haven’t sent out the official invitations yet, but they said they were thinking of just having a small wedding. You know, close family, friends and such.”

“A couple of months?” Courtney asked. “That doesn’t give me much time.”

“Don’t you have anything in your wardrobe that you could wear?” Dad asked, a teasing glint in his eyes.

“No, I’ve never been to a wedding, so I don’t have anything fit for one.” Courtney retorted, missing the joke.

“Ah, looks like you’re in for a shopping trip love.” Dad winked at Mum. She smiled and stuck her tongue out at him from across the table.

I glanced down at my food. My parents were so happy together. They had their fights but they always worked them out. Why couldn’t I work out my fights?

“So girls, when would you like to go shopping for new clothes?” Mum asked, feigning exhaustion.

“Oh, well I’ll have to find out what sort of venue it’s being held in before I decide what I’m going to wear.” Courtney flicked her hair over her shoulder.

“Courts, you really do make such a big fuss over all of this.” Sarah shook her head, grinning.

“Just because I care about how I look. First impressions always matter.”

“Yes, but once people get to know you, they’ll find out that you are as shallow as it gets and you’ll be right back where you started.” Anne teased.

“How’s Bobby Anne?” Courtney asked sweetly.

“Ooh, who’s Bobby?” Dad leaned forwards and wiggled his eyebrows. “Come on Anne, you have to spill now.”

Anne flushed a bright red and focused intently on her food. “He’s a friend from school.”

“Doesn’t look like just a friend.” Dad continued.

Anne glared sideways at Courtney who flashed a smile, dripping with insincerity. “He’s a friend from school who is in a couple of my classes.” She raised her face, now back to her normal colouring. “End of.”

“Okay okay.” Dad raised his hands in surrender and turned back to his food. “So, do you know when they are having the engagement party?” Dad turned to me.

“I think they said they were planning to have it in a couple of weeks. David is going to hospital next week, so I think they were thinking the week after that. Or something like that.” I shrugged.

“Oh yes, they were going to have us over for dinner before he went. Is that still happening?” Mum asked.

I shrugged again. “No idea, perhaps not because of the engagement party.”

“They’re having it at their place?”

“As far as I could tell.”

Mum nodded, satisfied. “Perhaps we could have them here for dinner before he goes to hospital then.”

“You can always ask Mum.” I replied.

She nodded again and finished her food. “Would anyone like some dessert?”

I shook my head. “I better go get stuck into my homework.” I placed my plate in the dishwasher and then hurried upstairs, glad to be finally away from the constant questions.

I sat at my desk and opened my books. The work looked easy tonight. And it was. I was finished within the hour. I sighed and spun my chair around. I guess I could go on the computer. I logged on and opened the internet. I paused before loading the blogging site. There were no comments on the last blog that I had posted. I shrugged, it had been read though. Who had read it? Pity you could never see that.

I logged onto MSN. Nobody was online. That was the way of it since I had stopped talking to Strider. It almost seemed as if they had all boycotted me. Not that I really talked to them before, but I really felt it now. Emptiness, pressing down against me. Standing in a room that is slowly getting small, pushing the breath from my lungs, until there is no more room to breathe, to think.

I shook my head. That is so melodramatic.

But part of it feels true. I don’t know what it is, but right now, at this very moment, because I don’t have Strider to talk to, I just feel so alone.