Acting On Love

The next few days went by in the same manor. Lisa was still acting like I didn't exist - even as I attempted to force her to make eye-contact with me at lunch. For one second on that Thursday, it did work, but only for a few seconds. Her eyes looked annoyed - as if she'd known I'd been keeping my eyes on her for a while. They flickered from her new friends to meet mine for a moment, as if to shoo me away, before they went back to listen to her new friends intently.

I sighed and dropped my cutlery in defeat. I knew what this meant - it meant that she wasn't giving in. I had been hoping that guilt had perhaps been to much for her to take by now, but obviously I had been extremely wrong.

I'd spent the past couple of days sitting alone at lunch. It was slightly less embarrassing now, as most of the people in the lunch hall didn't seem to find it amusing the second and third time round. But it was still getting to me.

I was half tempted to just push my tray off the table and march out of the lunch hall with what was left of the shattered remains of my dignity and pride.

Of course, Ville hadn't dared to go anywhere near my table, although I often met his glances from across the lunch hall. His eyes always dimmed when they met mine. I missed having someone to talk to so much that I called him each of those nights when I was alone in my room.

He frequently apologised about what happened between me and Lisa (once I'd conjured up the guts to tell him that she knew). I could tell that he was worried about this, although he never said it.

Once again, I found myself seated alone at lunch. The only consolation in this was that it would be the weekend once I'd managed to kill that day. Ah, the weekend. That meant one thing that I cared about - Ville's birthday. One thing I'd managed to fit in between sitting alone at lunch and trying to concentrate on acting was choosing Ville's present. I had wandered the town for a long time, and found nothing that seemed to strike me as Ville. Then I realised that's because I was looking for expensive gifts - all way beyond my pathetic budget. But I couldn't afford to buy him anything expensive, so I chose something that had a meaning instead. In fact I bought two, just incase the so-called "thoughtful" present crashed and burned.

I looked up once I'd finished lunch, to see to my disappointment that he had already left the lunch hall.

The rest of the day went by relatively quickly. I waited in my room, on my bed, reading the book "Arizona Dreams" which I'd managed to abandon for a while. I managed to jump back into the plot quite easily, although my mind was mostly elsewhere.

My phone remained silent and still on my bed-side table. This bothered me a lot. Surely Ville was going to call about the next day? I still didn't know what was happening. Were we still even going to have a meal together?

I waited and continued reading, until I needed to go to sleep. He still hadn't called. I considered calling him, but decided against it when I saw the time.

I woke up the next morning to uncomfortable nervous pains in my stomach - I was still worrying about the presents. But it was too late to change them. I took a deep breath and checked my phone which had been left on all night. Still nothing. Once I'd showered and tried to kill as much time as possible eating breakfast, it was nearing 11 o'clock. Still nothing.

I decided to take my chances and head over to his place anyway. I picked up the wrapped presents and put them in my bag before I left the site of the university behind me and followed the path Ville had taken me when we'd both ditched together. I found his apartment reasonably easily.

I pressed the intercom and held my breath.

"Hello?" His voice sounded surprised - as if he wasn't expecting anyone.

"It's me," I said, with a smile on my face which I couldn't control.

"Oh, Kristen! Right, uh. . . Hold on." I heard a voice in the background asking who it was, and the sound of him pressing a button. The other voice confused and frightened me. I'd expected him to be alone. . . "It's open," he continued.

I pushed open the door, my fingers feeling slightly weaker than they had a second before. Who was in that apartment with him. . .? Very nice, Kristen. It's good to see you trust him, a voice in my head whispered. I shook my head and pressed on up the many flights of stairs to his apartment. When I reached his door, I could barely feel my jelly-like legs beneath me. He's going to hate the presents. You still have time - just turn around and make a run for it, the voice continued. I ignored it unwillingly.

With clammy hands I knocked on the door twice.

It opened moments later, and Ville was standing before me, holding the door open just so I could see his body and nothing else.

"Hey," he smiled, looking a little worried. I gulped. No, this wasn't happening. . . Was it?

I took a step forward. "You didn't call. Not once," I whispered, my voice shaking slightly.

"Yes, I'm really sorry about that," he said in a rushed tone. He cast his glance inside the door, at whoever was in there with him, and looked back to me again. He was blatently nervous about something.

"Who are you talking to?" a voice came from inside his apartment. The voice surprised me. It sounded more mature, and had an accent to it.

He sighed, and looked back to me. Then he pushed the door open completely. Standing just within his apartment was an older couple. His parents.

A sudden wave of relief washed over me. I silently punished myself for even thinking what I had thought.

"Kristen, these are my parents," he said, gesturing a hand towards the pair. Then he turned to them. "This is Kristen. My. . .girlfriend."

At first both their eyes lit up as they looked at me. I smiled back, beginning to feel self-conscious. But as Ville's mother's eyes examined my face, they seemed to take on a hint of. . .regret of some sort. But she still smiled. Ville's father extended a hand towards me.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," he said, still smiling. His English was lined with the Finnish accent, yet not so much as to make his words unrecognisable.

"You too," I smiled, shaking his hand. I turned to Ville's mother. Her smile had almost faded. Her eyes seemed to study me subtly, hiding whatever it was that they saw. She shook my hand too without saying anything more.

Ville invited me in to the kitchen, where we all sat down together. I couldn't believe this was happening - I'd turned up to his apartment, obviously somewhat younger than he was, with my stupid, stupid gifts, and in clothes which only me and Ville would find at all appealing. I should have taken the lack of calls as a hint. . . I thought silently as Ville made us tea.

Ville's mother said something quietly in Finnish to Ville, as she sat across from me. He stopped pouring the tea for a moment and gave her a hesitant look.

"Please, in English whilst Kristen's here," he said, smiling faintly. This made his mother mutter another word in Finnish, which made Ville laugh quietly to himself.

There was no doubt in my mind that she had said something about me to him. Later I promised myself that I would find out what it was - what had seemed to taint her first impression of me.