Secrets Don't Make Friends

Jason caught October in the hall, trapping her against the lockers. She could barely look him in the eye as he slung the insults. Being insulted and verbally abused everyday by Jason for over a year, October should have been numb to the pain, but she felt every word, every stab, every pierce just as sharp as the last. And literally, too. October winced as Jason shoved a sharp finger just above her breast.

Tears began to form in her eyes as Jason pressed on, whispering evil names and horrible insults. He tore into her, ripping her to the bone; Jason was never one to sugarcoat a situation. But as Jason's abuse began to heighten he stopped, turning his head to the side. October followed his gaze and saw the boy from lunch, smiling back at her. She attempted to smile but all she managed to do was quiver her bottom lip.

By the sounds of it, Jason knew the boy. Beckett, he had called him. The name was foreign to October but she filed it away, memorizing the boys face. His features were soft, big brown eyes, chestnut hair, thin lips. His bone structure was strong with high cheekbones and a cleft chin. She realized, as he smirked at Jason, that this Beckett character knew Jason. And nothing but arrogance, ruthlessness, and pure venom came from knowing Jason.

As soon as she realized this, Jason pushed himself away from the lockers, stalking away from October and the boy. Beckett turned his head to watch Jason leave and October took this as her cue to leave. Noiselessly she removed herself from the row of lockers and began her journey back to class. She only made it halfway down the hall before she heard her name being called. Stopping abruptly, October turned on her heel to face Beckett. He rushed the length of the hall stopping in front of her.

"How did you know my name?" she asked, although she was already sure how he gained the knowledge. When he answered Jason Siska, October gave him a good, long look. As she did so, he held out his hand.

"I'm William," he told her, flashing her a polite smile.

Before taking his hand October glanced warily at it. She couldn't be sure if he was friend or foe. Finally she took his hand shaking it once before letting him go. She considered him for another moment before the heat of his stare forced her eyes to her feet, which shuffled uncomfortably. Still undecided, she figured that he at least deserved a thank you.

"Well, thank you for getting rid of Jason," she muttered, falling into the flow of students.

The bell for the end of the day rang, signaling to October that it was time to go home. She picked up her bag and walked to her locker. Sighing, October stared at the picture of her best friend. She had a sudden urge to visit her today, but she wouldn't know what to say. Biting her lip, she slammed her locker shut and crossed off the grounds. October hadn't visited Audrina in weeks and she felt that now was as good a time as ever.

The November air bit mercilessly at October as she walked to Barrington's local flower shop. She walked right over to the Lily's Section and picked out pink, purple and white Cala Lilies, Audrina's favorite. Ms Abel, the owner of the small shop, smiled warmly at October as she rummaged through her bag looking for her wallet.

"Good afternoon, October. I haven't seen you in here for a few weeks. How have things been?" the young woman asked, ringing up the lilies.

"Afternoon, Ms Abel. I've been alright, thank you for asking," she replied handing her a twenty dollar bill. "Thank you for the flowers, Ms Abel. See you soon," October smiled, walking out the door.

Barrington Memorial Cemetery was only a block away from the flower shop and October was grateful for that. Through the entrance, she smiled at the afternoon security guard and took the all too familiar path to Audrina, following the same foot pattern she always takes. The one and only thing October liked about the cemetery was that it was very quiet and peaceful, the perfect place to come and think. Audrina's flat headstone came into October's view and October smiled, kneeling to place the bouquet of Lilies at the base of the headstone.

Sitting at the end of the grave, October faced the headstone and began to talk. "I've been a bad friend," she began, resting her hands in her lap. "I should visit more often, but I don't and you probably thought I forgot about you. I'm not going to make any excuses because I don't have any, but know that I would never forget about you. You are... were... my best friend, and I could never forget about you." Tears began to block her vision as the hard lump formed in her throat, making it painful to speak.

"But I'm here, don't worry. I don't think I could ever forget about you. You always made sure that I was included, and that's what made you a good friend. And look at me... visiting after weeks of forgetting," she laughed bitterly, the tears falling and soaking into the dirt. She sniffed, looking longingly at the ground.

"It's so hard, Aduri," October whispered, trying not to break the barrier between crying and sobbing. "Nothing at school has changed. I've never seen people act so ruthless and... and cruel. No one understands what I go through everyday, putting up with their snickering and whispering behind my back. They don't get that everyday I cry over it and I feel horrible about everythi—" Her voice caught in her throat as the words got lost in the sobs that burst from her chest.

October placed a hand flat on Audrina's grave before walking away, wrapping herself in the lightweight jacket. The visit didn't go how October would have liked it. She didn't want to cry, she didn't want to breakdown. She knew that if Audrina was here with her she would scold her, telling her that her crying wouldn't fix anything. She would have to get up and do something, change things and make them better. But October couldn't bring herself to fix things. October cast her eyes shamefully at the ground, knowing that she was being weak.

The walk home didn't go as planned either. Halfway down her street she saw William Beckett, leaning against the light pole. October took a deep breath and curled into herself, walking past the tall boy. Unfortunately, she didn't get far until William recognized her. He called her name and she stopped, mentally yelling at herself for confirming that she was who he called after. Turning around, she looked up at Beckett who smiled down at her, which faltered almost immediately after seeing the tear stains on her cheeks.

"Hey," she mumbled, shuffling her feet. She was still highly unsure of Beckett and took a step back as he walked closer.

"Are you okay?" he asked, concern lacing his voice. He looked almost as concerned as he sounded, but October couldn't be sure.

"I'm fine."

He looked unconvinced at her. "Are you su—"

"Thanks for the concern, but I'm fine," she snapped. "Now I have to get home, if you don't mind." October gripped her jacket tighter as she turned on her heel and walked up the driveway, slamming the door behind her.