Finding Her
11. "I love You Frank"
Franks POV
I invited Gerard in for some coffee he gladly took the coffee and started gulping it down.
“Gerard can I ask what’s wrong?” I asked as he looked at the coffee mug.
“Yes, but it doesn’t mean I’ll answer,” he replied something has been wrong with him for the past month and it is starting to scare me a lot, I mean my best friend comes round to my house just about every single day and the same thing happens over and over again, I sighed and looked at him. He still didn’t want to talk to me.
“Gerard are you going to do this every fucking day for the rest of our lives, you come around crying, I ask if I can ask what’s wrong and you reply ‘yes but it doesn’t mean I’ll answer’ c’mon Gee just tell me what bugging you, I’ll try and help, please.” I begged at him. He finally looked up at me and sighed.
“You can’t help, you can’t help the problem…” it had seemed like he wanted to say more so I gave him a look to tell him to carry on and I was still listening. “Because…” he looked back down at his mug and replied I didn’t quiet catch what he had said.
“Gerard you know fine I couldn’t have been able to understand that, please just tell me already,” I replied getting angry with him.
“You. Can’t. Solve. The. Problem. Because…”he started slowly he closed his eyes and took in a deep breathe, “You are the problem,” he said fast, but I could understand the words he had just said. What did he mean by I was the problem, had I done something to upset him or what?
I walked over and sat beside him and put my hand on my back,
“Tell me what I have done,” I asked trying to soothe him as much as possible.
“You haven’t done anything wrong, it’s you for being well…you,” he said behind tears.
“Gerard, I don’t understand,”
“If you weren’t so you-ish then non of this would have happened I would be happy with Megan and we would be best friends till the end, but it’s your fault, you are way to amazing and I love it but hate it at the same time, I love you!” he blurted out with tears streaming down his face. I lifted his face up and looked into his eyes I tried to find something in their maybe the truth I searched and searched but all I could find was what he just told me. I felt a little bit happier…wait what am I thinking I can’t be happy about this…can I?
Gerards POV
I can’t believe I just told him that, I saw a smile form on his face for a few seconds but then it just disappeared, he needed time to think about this I knew he did because it took me 3 years to think about it, and I only found out what this feeling was a few weeks ago and everyday since I found out I would go crying ‘round to Frank, there was no where else to go I mean yeah I could talk to Mikey about it but I mean its just he’s my brother I can’t go to him crying he’d think it’d be something bigger than me finding out that I was in love with Frank.
”Gerard how long have you?” he asked in a state of what seemed to be shock
“About 3 years but I only found out what it was a few weeks ago…when I first started coming round crying like I am now,” I said but with pauses because I had been gasping for air quirkier than usual just because of the tears.
“Gerard the worst thing is I’m going to have to say, I think I do to…love you that is, but I need time to find out can you hang on till then?” he asked removing his hand from my face. I had just nodded, I didn’t know what else to do. “The guys are going to be coming round soon Gee,” he added. I knew about the guys coming round I had given Mikey my present, I told him I’d be there but I wanted a coffee and didn’t want to carry it around. I pretended like I didn’t know it was his birthday, but I’m a really bad actor. So I sat down beside him and pulled him into a hug and whispered in his ear.
“Happy birthday! I love you never forget that,” he gratefully hugged me back, I could tell he was crying.
I invited Gerard in for some coffee he gladly took the coffee and started gulping it down.
“Gerard can I ask what’s wrong?” I asked as he looked at the coffee mug.
“Yes, but it doesn’t mean I’ll answer,” he replied something has been wrong with him for the past month and it is starting to scare me a lot, I mean my best friend comes round to my house just about every single day and the same thing happens over and over again, I sighed and looked at him. He still didn’t want to talk to me.
“Gerard are you going to do this every fucking day for the rest of our lives, you come around crying, I ask if I can ask what’s wrong and you reply ‘yes but it doesn’t mean I’ll answer’ c’mon Gee just tell me what bugging you, I’ll try and help, please.” I begged at him. He finally looked up at me and sighed.
“You can’t help, you can’t help the problem…” it had seemed like he wanted to say more so I gave him a look to tell him to carry on and I was still listening. “Because…” he looked back down at his mug and replied I didn’t quiet catch what he had said.
“Gerard you know fine I couldn’t have been able to understand that, please just tell me already,” I replied getting angry with him.
“You. Can’t. Solve. The. Problem. Because…”he started slowly he closed his eyes and took in a deep breathe, “You are the problem,” he said fast, but I could understand the words he had just said. What did he mean by I was the problem, had I done something to upset him or what?
I walked over and sat beside him and put my hand on my back,
“Tell me what I have done,” I asked trying to soothe him as much as possible.
“You haven’t done anything wrong, it’s you for being well…you,” he said behind tears.
“Gerard, I don’t understand,”
“If you weren’t so you-ish then non of this would have happened I would be happy with Megan and we would be best friends till the end, but it’s your fault, you are way to amazing and I love it but hate it at the same time, I love you!” he blurted out with tears streaming down his face. I lifted his face up and looked into his eyes I tried to find something in their maybe the truth I searched and searched but all I could find was what he just told me. I felt a little bit happier…wait what am I thinking I can’t be happy about this…can I?
Gerards POV
I can’t believe I just told him that, I saw a smile form on his face for a few seconds but then it just disappeared, he needed time to think about this I knew he did because it took me 3 years to think about it, and I only found out what this feeling was a few weeks ago and everyday since I found out I would go crying ‘round to Frank, there was no where else to go I mean yeah I could talk to Mikey about it but I mean its just he’s my brother I can’t go to him crying he’d think it’d be something bigger than me finding out that I was in love with Frank.
”Gerard how long have you?” he asked in a state of what seemed to be shock
“About 3 years but I only found out what it was a few weeks ago…when I first started coming round crying like I am now,” I said but with pauses because I had been gasping for air quirkier than usual just because of the tears.
“Gerard the worst thing is I’m going to have to say, I think I do to…love you that is, but I need time to find out can you hang on till then?” he asked removing his hand from my face. I had just nodded, I didn’t know what else to do. “The guys are going to be coming round soon Gee,” he added. I knew about the guys coming round I had given Mikey my present, I told him I’d be there but I wanted a coffee and didn’t want to carry it around. I pretended like I didn’t know it was his birthday, but I’m a really bad actor. So I sat down beside him and pulled him into a hug and whispered in his ear.
“Happy birthday! I love you never forget that,” he gratefully hugged me back, I could tell he was crying.