Burning Cities
Counting Waves
The west side Dairy Queen was stuffed with teenagers from both the two major high schools in our small city of Blackvale, so I pulled into the driveway instead. Devin was calm the entire short ride over here, but made small talk with me. We asked each other questions and got to know each other and before I knew it, I had realized this boy and I had much more in common then I'd expect. He made me laugh, made me feel welcome, and even though Alan was nice like this before, Devin didn't seem like the kind to rip my heart into shreds and rape mele after a whi.
"You know, the moon is thought to be a very feminine astral body." Devin pointed out.
"I know, I love the moon. It calls to me. I love watching it out my window on top of my roof. Unfortunately, the snow covers it up, and the moon and the sky is it's prettiest during the winter." I told him, and his already wide smile broadened.
"That's so neat. I've never had a room with a window to view the sky in. Your parents must be rich." He exclaimed but I shook my head wearily.
"My dad's a workaholic and my parents are divorced. They have been for three years. He works to fill the void, and he's re-done the entire house. Well, he's paid someone else to do it and he let me re-do my room with what I wanted it. He did all that to kind of rid my mother's image away." I told him, feeling a little bit guilty for revealing such a heavy topic. I'm not use to talking about my life with someone since Alan didn't like hearing me whine and complain. I guess I understood his reasons to a certain extent, since Alan lived with a poor family that had a mother addicted to meth and an abusive step-father. A normal family in Blackvale.
"I'm not surprised to hear they are divorced. My parents were too at a time." Devin's voice had quieted so softly, it was almost a whisper.
"If you don't mind me asking, why do you speak in past tense?"
"They're dead." My face was struck with horror, but Devin chuckled like it was nothing, "please don't feel bad about that. I remember them not being together when I was five but, shit happened and now I live with this foster mother of sorts."
"I don't know what to say. " I laughed nervously, "but I agree with you, shit does happen."
We were silent after that, and I think he was lost in his own thoughts because his face had gone blank and his brilliantly dazzling eyes dulled. I wondered what he was thinking about as I pulled up to the speaker, and rolled down my window.
"What can I do for you?" The invisible voice asked, and I skimmed the menu quickly.
"A medium cookie dough blizzard, and..." I turned my head to look at Devin, who was staring at me like I was crazy, "and you?"
"I'll just have a snickers." He told me.
Once we had gotten our blizzards and I entered into traffic, Devin told me to drive out to the mountain.
"Are you crazy?" I asked him, looking out to the south where Blackvale's tall mountain stood, the peaks smooth and it was entirely covered in snow. I bet it was beautiful up there. Beautiful with slick roads and danger that lies behind every turn.
"Yes." He responded, and I narrowed my eyebrows and shook my head.
"No, my car can't take going up there. Especially since the tires are bald." I told him and he pouted his lips.
Something inside me swelled as his clear blue eyes sparkled with enthusiasm as he continued to pout me down. What was it about this boy that made me feel so alive? I'd look at him and every cell in my body wanted him and buzzed around, completely ecstatic. Goose bumps would rise on my skin and making me shudder, filling me up like an empty glass. I shook my head as he deepened his frown and I sighed.
"How 'bout we just go out to the lake?" I asked him, and his frown wavered as he placed his thumb and his index finger onto his chin in thought. He looked so cute as his black hair fell away from his eyes, underneath the hood of his black hoodie.
"Sure. If your tires are bald you should get them replaced." He suggested, sitting back into his seat.
I giggled, "I know I do, but I just don't have the money."
"That's not an excuse. You said your father works out of his consciousness. He probably won't even know what he's writing a check for if you ask him." Hearing him say that emptied my glass a little bit and my head bowed slightly as I breathed in sharply. My father doesn't know what he's doing anymore. He's just a hermit that follows a boring, daily routine that oddly enough, doesn't include me.
"I didn't mean to..." Devin spoke softly, but I shook my head, brushing off what I was feeling. At least, trying to.
"It's alright. I've learned to accept his way of life." I lied straight through my teeth, because I didn't accept my dad's way of life. I can't come to terms with the fact that all he's ever said to me for three years is that the take out will be coming soon. That's it, and that's all it will ever be.
"You know, the moon is thought to be a very feminine astral body." Devin pointed out.
"I know, I love the moon. It calls to me. I love watching it out my window on top of my roof. Unfortunately, the snow covers it up, and the moon and the sky is it's prettiest during the winter." I told him, and his already wide smile broadened.
"That's so neat. I've never had a room with a window to view the sky in. Your parents must be rich." He exclaimed but I shook my head wearily.
"My dad's a workaholic and my parents are divorced. They have been for three years. He works to fill the void, and he's re-done the entire house. Well, he's paid someone else to do it and he let me re-do my room with what I wanted it. He did all that to kind of rid my mother's image away." I told him, feeling a little bit guilty for revealing such a heavy topic. I'm not use to talking about my life with someone since Alan didn't like hearing me whine and complain. I guess I understood his reasons to a certain extent, since Alan lived with a poor family that had a mother addicted to meth and an abusive step-father. A normal family in Blackvale.
"I'm not surprised to hear they are divorced. My parents were too at a time." Devin's voice had quieted so softly, it was almost a whisper.
"If you don't mind me asking, why do you speak in past tense?"
"They're dead." My face was struck with horror, but Devin chuckled like it was nothing, "please don't feel bad about that. I remember them not being together when I was five but, shit happened and now I live with this foster mother of sorts."
"I don't know what to say. " I laughed nervously, "but I agree with you, shit does happen."
We were silent after that, and I think he was lost in his own thoughts because his face had gone blank and his brilliantly dazzling eyes dulled. I wondered what he was thinking about as I pulled up to the speaker, and rolled down my window.
"What can I do for you?" The invisible voice asked, and I skimmed the menu quickly.
"A medium cookie dough blizzard, and..." I turned my head to look at Devin, who was staring at me like I was crazy, "and you?"
"I'll just have a snickers." He told me.
Once we had gotten our blizzards and I entered into traffic, Devin told me to drive out to the mountain.
"Are you crazy?" I asked him, looking out to the south where Blackvale's tall mountain stood, the peaks smooth and it was entirely covered in snow. I bet it was beautiful up there. Beautiful with slick roads and danger that lies behind every turn.
"Yes." He responded, and I narrowed my eyebrows and shook my head.
"No, my car can't take going up there. Especially since the tires are bald." I told him and he pouted his lips.
Something inside me swelled as his clear blue eyes sparkled with enthusiasm as he continued to pout me down. What was it about this boy that made me feel so alive? I'd look at him and every cell in my body wanted him and buzzed around, completely ecstatic. Goose bumps would rise on my skin and making me shudder, filling me up like an empty glass. I shook my head as he deepened his frown and I sighed.
"How 'bout we just go out to the lake?" I asked him, and his frown wavered as he placed his thumb and his index finger onto his chin in thought. He looked so cute as his black hair fell away from his eyes, underneath the hood of his black hoodie.
"Sure. If your tires are bald you should get them replaced." He suggested, sitting back into his seat.
I giggled, "I know I do, but I just don't have the money."
"That's not an excuse. You said your father works out of his consciousness. He probably won't even know what he's writing a check for if you ask him." Hearing him say that emptied my glass a little bit and my head bowed slightly as I breathed in sharply. My father doesn't know what he's doing anymore. He's just a hermit that follows a boring, daily routine that oddly enough, doesn't include me.
"I didn't mean to..." Devin spoke softly, but I shook my head, brushing off what I was feeling. At least, trying to.
"It's alright. I've learned to accept his way of life." I lied straight through my teeth, because I didn't accept my dad's way of life. I can't come to terms with the fact that all he's ever said to me for three years is that the take out will be coming soon. That's it, and that's all it will ever be.