Who Am I?

Rubbing her eyes Liz sat up in her bed, and she wondered if she had dreamed it all. Quickly her doubts were subsided as she looked at a very worried Lucas who sat by her bedside, and Liz noticed she was clutching the letters.

“Lucas,” said Liz trying to comfort him and in her heart of hearts it was like there had been no separation.

“Hey, you hungry?,” asked Lucas.

“No, where’s Michael?” asked Liz.

“He mumbled something about groceries, and left,” said Lucas.

“He wasn’t expecting two brothers,” said Liz.

“No, I think Hales, and mom ticked him off with their cleaning spree,” said Lucas whispering.

“Hales?” questioned Liz as she wondered who was in her house.

“Nathan's wife Haley you met her yesterday,” asked Lucas.

“My memory is a little foggy” said Liz.

“Do you know about the b - a - b - y?” asked Lucas.

“Haley?” asked Liz.

“No, Mom,” said Lucas.

“It’s not,” asked Liz.

“No, not Dan’s,” said Lucas cutting her off.

“Keith's?” asked Liz.

“Keith,” said Lucas with a hint of sadness and instantly Liz saw through his front.

“When my Grandma Claudia died I felt lost and utterly alone. It didn’t matter that I had family or friends. I felt the way I did. No one knows this, but Michael took me out of town to Lincoln. He took me to this Boxing place, and from the outside it looks bad. You walk in and you are greeted by the most friendly people. Who don’t know jack about you, or what you are going through. I spent all day pummeling a punching bag, and no one thought twice about it. I could be everything I wasn’t allowed to be at home. I was angry at my grandma for leaving me. I was angry that she didn’t fight harder. I was angry that the doctors didn’t save her. I was angry cause I felt like the doctors could of and should have done more. I was even angry at myself. I blamed myself on so many levels. If you let it; it will eat you alive. I wasn’t able to handle the loss, and I began to lose myself at the same time. I couldn’t pick it up or put it down. My grandma was my person, and without her I was lost to the world. Punching that bag put a face on all my anger, and gave an enemy that was physically there,” said Liz.

“I see what you mean, and it still bothers me. Basketball was a place I can forget for a while. I’m numb right now,” said Lucas.

“I get that. I was numb for about five seconds and went strait to angry. Just don’t let it eat at you,” said Liz as she repositioned herself into an Indian style sitting position.

“This is so easy like we’ve never been apart, strange?” asked Lucas.

“I know,” said Liz.

“Supper,” came the voice of a young woman causing Liz and Lucas to looked towards the bedroom door to see a young dirty blonde woman come in.

“This is Hales. She is the greatest,” said Lucas as he re-introduce Liz to Haley.

“Hi, my friend slash brother-in- law is biases,” said Haley bring in a tray with a burger, fries, and a soda.

“Hi,” said Liz.

“Eat everything or Karen will have my head,” said Haley setting the tray down.

“I’ll do my best,” said Liz as she ate a fry.

“Nathan, would like to see her,” said Haley looking to Lucas.

“Okay,” said Lucas as Liz picked up her burger and took a bite. Lucas stood up and left with Haley.

Not long and Liz looked up to see a tall young man with dark brown hair almost the same shade as her own.

“Hi,” said Liz setting her burger down.

“Hi,” said Nathan and Liz knew he would be harder than Lucas was.

“My name legally is Elizabeth, but most of my friends call me Liz,” said Liz.

“Nathan,” said Nathan cautiously.

“This is so weird. You go your whole life thinking certain things. Our lives have been put in a blender, and pulsed. Then it’s dumped out and left for us to deal with,” said Liz.

“Yeah,” said Nathan.

“How about my blood type? I can tell you that and you tell me what Dan’s blood type? My parents are both O, so since I‘m A I’m not theirs” asked Liz.

“Dan’s AB,” said Nathan.

“AB people can only have children who are A, B, or AB.” said Liz.

“I remember learning something about that,” said Nathan.

“DNA is the only definitive proof, and it is the only way to settle any doubt,” said Liz.

“Dad will want it,” said Nathan.

“I figured as much,” said Liz.

Nathan seemed to space out like he had just realized something.

“You look so much like…” said Nathan trailing off.

“Who?” asked Liz.

“A painting Karen has of your grandmother in the attic. It’s eerie, and unnerving how much you look like her. You are like a carbon copy of her with the exception of her hair went to the ground,” said Nathan.

“Well I guess she’s pretty huh?” said Liz.

“Yeah from the first look I got of it. It seem like she was about to tell you something. Her eyes were so expressive, and you could tell by looking at her she had this air of innocence about her with a touch of mystery,” said Nathan.

“Sounds like an interesting woman,” said Liz.

“Lucas told me a story about her.” said Nathan.

“Confined to my bed, so spill,” said Liz.

“Well your grandmother had this whirlwind romance with your grandfather, and they got married. One day he disappeared, and your grandmother found out she was pregnant. She told Karen he left because to protect them. Never telling her what it was, and she told Lucas the story.” said Nathan.

“I’m not feeling well maybe you could come back later,” said Liz putting the tray on the nightstand.

“Sure,” said Nathan as he turned and left.

As soon as she heard the door click Liz rolled out of bed, and prayed that she was stressed nothing more. Quickly she made her way to her backpack and ripped threw it looking for her calendar. Finally at the bottom Liz found it, and then she flipped threw it like a mad woman. There it stood staring her in the face the possibility.

“Not again. Not again,” Liz repeated rocking over and over.

Suddenly Liz remembered that Maria had stuck a pregnancy test in her jacket as a joke. Now she would know for sure, but Liz racked her brain of where she had put her jacket. Hitting her hands against her head she tried to remember as she sunk to the floor. All at once she remembered she had stuck it in the closet behind some boxes. Scrambling Liz made her way into the closet, and reached behind some boxes pulling out the jacket. Shaking Liz put her hand in the pocket pulling out the box, and fingering it.

“Liz,” came Michael’s voice scaring her to death.

“Get out,” said Liz as normal as possible, and then she heard him mumble something about PMS.

As soon as she heard the door click she made her way to the door. Cracking the door Liz watched him go back downstairs, and then she made her way to the bathroom locking herself in. Still shaking Liz opened the box, and slid the test in her hand. Then the possibility was all too real, and with all her might she fought the tears. Reading the instructions carefully Liz followed it exactly step by step, and then she set it on the sink. Waiting was the worst causing Liz to pace the floor. Finally Liz sat down on the floor afraid someone might hear her in there, and that was the last thing she wanted. Time seemed to take forever as Liz stared at her watch, and she didn’t want to believe it was happening again. It was hard enough to give up Little Lucas temporarily , but she was married this time. Clamping her hand over her mouth Liz did her best to stifle her sobs. Next she started to rock back and forth as the waiting got unbearable. Everything that could go wrong Liz started to see like a bad movie. She saw Michael finding out, and he started yelling at her telling her it was her fault. In the end Michael walking out on her. Next she saw Michael blaming himself, but still walking out leaving her alone. After that she saw everyone she loved turning their backs on her calling her all kinds of names.

“Liz, are you in there?” came Karen’s voice snapping her back to reality.

“Yeah,” said Liz as normally as possible not wanting to worry her mom.

“You okay?” asked Karen worried about her daughter.

“Yeah, just PMS,” said Liz sticking with Michael’s assumption.

“Okay,” said Karen not wanting to push her, and she left.

Getting off the ground Liz picked up the test, and there it was a positive result. Pregnant. There was no denying it now, and Liz then went into survival mode. Without hesitation she cleaned up the bathroom until it shined and made sure the bag was full enough to be going out with the evidence of the test. Satisfied that there was no sign of what happened she unlocked the door, and then opened the door. Going downstairs Liz went to the kitchen, and handed the bag to Michael who was sitting at the kitchen table.

“Take it out, please,” said Liz.

“Okay,” said Michael.

Knowing she had to act normal Liz planned to do her best.

“What smells so good?” asked Liz as her stomached churned.

“It’s Chili, but I made you a salad with grilled chicken. There is dressing in the fridge,” said Karen as she handed her a small bowl with big strips of chicken.

“Thanks,” said Liz grabbing a loaf of bread off the counter and went to the kitchen table.

“Your welcome,” said Karen, and Liz was glad it didn’t make her stomach churn like the chili.

Getting out two slices of bread and Liz made her self a sandwich. Slowly Liz ate the sandwich.

“Where are Nathan, Haley, and Lucas?” asked Liz after eating half of her sandwich.

“Here I am” Lucas said coming in the room.

“Nathan, and Haley went home,” said Karen.

“Oh,” said Liz.

“Haley, will be here tomorrow since tomorrow is a off day. It let’s the teachers play catch up,” said Karen.

“Oh,” said Liz and she finished her sandwich.

“I could show you around tomorrow,” said Lucas.

“Sure,” said Liz plastering a fake smile on her face.

“We can go down to the River Court first thing,” said Lucas.

“What do you have a thing for basketball?” asked Liz trying to be witty.

“I play ball at school, and I’ll put you through the paces tomorrow,” said Lucas.

“Oooo Scary,” said Liz not knowing what else to say.

“I’ll pack you two lunches,” said Karen.

“Thanks, but I can pack something,” said Liz.

“Okay,” said Karen still worried, but upsetting Liz wouldn‘t be good right now.

“I’m tired I must have jet lag or something like that.” said Liz.

“The doctor said it was probably stress,” said Karen.

“Doctor?” asked Liz as Michael came in.

“Yes, he said your blood pressure was high. When I told him about everything happening so fast with finding out everything the doctor said it was stress,” said Michael sitting next to her.

“I was worried, and so was Michael. Michael wanted to respected your wishes, so I called in a favor from an old friend and he stopped by” said Karen.

“I’m sorry. I gonna hit the hay then, so no more worry like that,” said Liz as she got up, and kissed him on the cheek.

“I’ll be up in a bit,” said Michael and then Liz made her way upstairs.

Reaching her room Liz opened the door, and flipped on the light. Liz headed strait to the bed, and crawled in. Not long Liz huddled up into a ball as the tears flowed down her cheeks again. This time she didn’t care if Michael walked in cause he’d just think it was PMS again. Soon Liz fell fast asleep, and she relaxed laying out on the bed like normal.