You Don't Know a Thing About My Sins, How The Misery Begins

I woke up again the next day with the feeling of disgust in my gut. Angry that I was waking to this same face every day. Every single day! Waking to this difficult life. The challenge of living only getting harder.

But once I thought of Mikey, my horrid thoughts went away. He was what I could call the main part of my life that kept me going. I don't know how it happened so soon. It all happened so fast. Amazingly fast. So fast it was scary. But it happened and it's okay. He now holds a more special place in my heart than anyone I've ever known.

I walked down stairs after taking care of buisness. Victor was already sitting there on the couch along with Bob.

"Hey guys," I said taking a seat next to Bob.

"Hey Jay," Bob said. His voice sounded a bit suspicious. But I decided to let it drop. On the matter that there was someone at the door.

It was, indeed, Mikey and Gee.

I opened the door and Mikey jumped at me, "Ello darling!" he yelled.

I chuckled "Hello hun!"

"Hey, whose driving you to school tomorrow?"

"Uh, I'm driving with my brothers."

"Darn! Well we will have to make plans after you arrive to your first day of skool."

"Indeed we shall!" I laughed.

'I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you! But I want it and I need it I'm addi- -' my cell was ringing. I held up a finger to Mikey as I answered it.

"Hullo?"

"Hey sweet heart," it was my dad.

"Hi Dad, what's up?"

"Uh, I'm out with your mother. Do you need anything for school?" he asked

"Yeah sure! Just buy like pens and pencils, notebook paper etcetera. I'll take care of all the complicated stuff later."

"OKay. May I speak with Damian?''

"Sure hold on,"

''Be right back'' I mouthed to Mikey and Gerard.

I walked up the stairs to Damian's room. It was noisy in there. "Damian?" I knocked on the door. No answer. I wrapped my hand around the door knob, entered the room. Damain was not yet dressed. He wore only a pair of red boxers. "Oh, sorry Dee!" I squealed.

"S'ok." he answered, slipping on a pair of shorts.

Dad wants to talk to you." I said.

I handed him the phone. He held onto it with his shoulder, using his strong tan arms to cover his brawny tan chest. I giggled at this. "Why are you covering your chest? You have no boobs." I whispered.

He shrugged.

He spoke to dad on the phone, "Yeah..." I didn't hear Dad respond, "Okay, just get me the basic stuff." A few seconds passed, "Vic too." A few more seconds. "Yeah, I'll cook supper. Bye."

He threw me the phone and jumped back on the bed and stared at me. "Hi." he finally said.

"Hi." I said back.

A long moment of awkward silence passed and finally he said, "Look Jas, I'm sorry about the way I acted towards your friends...I was just beind a weirdo."

"S'ok."

He jumped off the bed and strolled over to me and gave me a big bear hug. I hugged him back. I could feel tears building in my eyes. I started sobbing. He held me tighter. I buried my face into his chest. He had a warm chest for having such a cold heart. SHHH! Jasmin, don't ruin this moment. You haven't hugged your brother in so long. Right.

"I'm sorry for what you've been going through." he whispered.

"I've been handling it." I whispered.

"Mmm, I'm here to help."

"Of course." I said and we parted. He turned around to pick up a shirt from the floor and slip it on. It was a black shirt. A very tight shirt, it showed off all the muscles on his stomach.

"Are they here?" he asked surprized.

"Mmmm, who?" I asked dazed. But I only hugged my brother.

"Your friends..."

"Oh yeah." I said remembering Mikey down stairs waiting for me. "Come down soon, I never see you anymore."

"Okay. Bye."

I dashed down the carpeted steps to the living room. Mikey was hiding behind the kitchen counter ready to pounce. But I didn't know that! BAM! He caught me on my way to the couch, holding my waist. I immediatly stopped running when I felt his cool touch. Well not exactly 'cool'. He just sort of had clammy hands. He was now holding me from behind. "Hi," he whispered in my ear. He then kissed my cheek. Warm kisses crawling down my neck. He picked me up and carried me up the stairs to my room. I knew where this was going... He set me down on the bed. He removed his shirt.

"Mikey, please stop." I said.

"Why?" he asked eager to continue.

"Just stop." I said in a lower voice.

"We've done this before, babe."

"I know. It's just Damian is in the room right next to us and the door is open!" I growled, pointing at the door.

"No, no, there's something else wrong. What is it?"

"Ugh! Okay." I sighed. "I have to go to Sydni's funeral. Well, I don't have to go...but I think I want to."

"Okay, so what's the problem?"

"I need to have someone there with me..."

"Hmmm," he mused "I'll go with you!"

"You will?!"

"Of course, love."

"Well okay." I thought abpout it. That would be really awkward. But the tickets are already taken care of. "Great!"

I was suddenly so happy I just began kissing him everywhere. I kissed his bare chest and worked my way down to his abs. I felt him get excited under me so I stopped.

"Now what?" he asked a little annoyed.

"Mmmm, nothing." I said and continued.