Radio Man

“Are you ready yet?” Mikey is standing by the door with his arms crossed because Frank seriously can’t decide what the hell to wear!

“I, no, no, shit fuck!” It’s just too hard. Frank has too many clothes! Too damn many.

“Frank. You’re just going to the radio station. You don’t need to get all like, done up or anything.”

“Yes! I mean, no I know. But, it’s just. I, Mikey!” And Frank maybe lets his foot stomp on the ground in frustration, and he maybe lets his bottom lip jut out for effect. But he definitely looks sexy doing it.

Definitely.

“Get in the fucking shower, I’ll chose your clothes. Jesus,” Mikey shakes his head while Frank plotters off to the bathroom with a smile the size of. The size of something really really massively huge on his face.

While Frank’s in the shower he can’t help but start to freak out about tonight. It’s not a date really but – wait. Is it? It’s just Gerard inviting him to his work for a few hours so he can see what he does right? He’s just going there to watch him work and meet his boss and friend and then maybe have tea with him at the station.

And Oh god it is a date!

Frank almost quite literally shits himself while he stand in the shower, but it’s not from fright or nervousness. No. He thinks it’s from those chocolates Mikey gave him earlier as a ‘sorry’ for scaring Frank off with the spider.

But Frank’s never had the shits from chocolate before. Only when he was a kid because his asshole of a best friend hid laxatives in them. But Mikey wouldn’t do that.

Would he?

No. No he wouldn’t. He better not have, because Frank can now feel his stomach gurgling and it’s making all these weird noises and Frank thinks that yes, Mikey actually might have done that.

But why! Why would Mikey do such a mean and horrible thing?

Because he’s a damn fucking bitch! and that’s all Frank gets to think because now he’s running out of the shower and stumbling to the toilet which thankfully is just a few steps away. But his fingers are wet and slippery with soap and he can’t get the damn toilet lid up and he swears if he doesn’t get his arse on that toilet seat within the next few seconds the floor tiling is going to be a nice few shades darker.

“Oh god! Oh god!” And YES! Frank finally gets the damn seat up and his arse makes contact and it’s all over.

Well not quite. But Frank’s making some really weird noises from his mouth because it just feels so damn good. It also feels like he hasn’t shat like this in months.

He’s going to kill Mikey.

“Urghhh!”

Well. He’s going to kill Mikey when he gets off this damn toilet.

“You ok in there Frank?” Frank can hear Mikey laughing and it’s now official.

Mikey is a down right bitch.

“Fuck off Mikey! You –Urghhh god damn it! Fuckin. Bitch!”

Please let this be a 10minute kind of laxative. Oh fuck. Oh god!