So Used

I was being dragged against my own will to the hospital. So here I was stood in my old red sweater and blue jeans and matching red converse, outside his door. Do I go in? Do I stay out here? I pulled my red cap further over my. I did not want to be here. I wanted to go home with Jamie, Oli and Abi, when tour was cancelled indefinitely, but oh no my dad wanted “To keep me close to stop me from doing something stupid.” He even let them take my baby pumpkin.

How old did they think I was. If push came to shove I would have stayed with mom for a bit. I wouldn’t have made the visit pleasant but I would have done it. I pulled out the new Ipod that mom sent me to try and butter me up and played about until I found some old baseball games. I sat in the plastic chair and pushed my ear buds into my ears.

“She’s getting worse than Zacky.” I heard someone whisper.

“Yea, but it keeps her happy, her room is getting worse tho, she just keeps getting jerseys and balls and poster and she even sewed a patch on to her converse.” I heard my dad laugh.

“I mean you leave her with Zack for a weekend and he brainwashes her, she’s become an obsessed Angels fan.” it sounded like the voice was smiling

Now there’s something I hadn’t seen these guys do in days. Smile. Everyone was left thinking about what would happen if he didn’t wake up.

“You know I can hear you, and just so you know, the angles are a kickass team, I’ve supported them from age 4, what makes you think thing’s are gonna change now?” I mumbled in a bored monotone.

I didn’t let my eye’s move from that screen.

“Is it game day?” The voice I finally recognised as uncle Johnny asked.

“Yup, I don’t know if I’m gonna catch it or not, so I’m gonna email Jamie and get her to record it for me.” I grinned.

I pulled the ear phones out and turned it off pushing the small device back into my pocket.

“They really aren’t that good, 1 world series title and 1 AL pennants.” Uncle Johnny scoffed

“Yeah but they have 8 west division titles.” I smirked

“Oh god there talking baseball.” My dad groaned making his way back into the room.

“So how come you haven’t been in since that day.” He asked in a small voice almost if he was afraid of my reaction.

“I just don’t wanna see him like that, it was bad enough finding him, so yea, and then I don’t wanna see him attached to all those machines if he’s not gonna…” My voice trailed off.

“Oh come on, you can’t think like that. I’m sure he would want you in there tho.” he smiled

“I don’t think he would, uncle Johnny, he hates me remember?” I sighed

“He doesn’t hate you. What makes you think that.” He frowned

Before I could even think of an answer of respond Aunt Michelle cut me off.

“Autumn Sanders, he didn’t hate you, he loved you to pieces, he was just scared, you two are so young and you were so serious. He’s a boy, he likes to run away from everything, Brian’s the exact same.” she laughed her eyes twinkling in the light at the mention of her husbands name.

I smiled and pulled myself off the seat, but before I could even take another step a doctor and a nurse rushed past us, pushing themselves into the room, pushing Uncle Zacky, Uncle Jimmy, Brian, Dad and Val out of the room.

“He’s doing it Mich! He’s waking up” Brian grinned picking his wife up and spinning her around,

“Bri careful the..” She drifted off.

It was too late everyone had caught on and there was man hugs and just hugs passed around.

“Wow a seventh Avenged kid, do you think the world can handle it?” Jimmy laughed.

I frowned and counted in my head.

“But there’s only six of us uncle Jimmy.” I laughed looking at his as if he was stupid.

Val slapped his head . She took my hand and pulled me to a quiet unused part of the waiting room.

“Sweetie you have to understand, we were young and I’ve begged your dad to keep this a secret, so that you could have a normal life, but well, we told the guys and we wanted to tell you over a nice dinner but we weren’t sure when. I guess I have to tell you now, When your dad left me for your mom, I was pregnant. I didn’t tell him until well after you were born I think you were six, you dad loved your mom and things weren’t the same with us. I didn’t want him to stay with me just cause he knocked me up. Autumn sweetie, you have an older brother, his names Maddock. I completely understand if you want nothing to do with him, but he knows about you and wants to meet you. I think since I told you all that, I might as well tell you, I love your dad very much, I don’t think I ever stopped and well we…we’re gonna give things another shot. That is if you don’t mind. I know it’s a lot to take in so we were going to give you time to think.” She smiled softly getting up and turning away.

“Val wait, I think this is great, everyone can see you and my dad are made for each other, it’s clear for blind people to see, yes he ‘loved’ my mom, but she was never Valary Renee Di Benedetto. I want you two to give it the best shot possible. As for my brother, is it possible to meet him when we go back. I always wanted an older brother. This is the best thing that could ever happen to me and to dad.” I laughed hugging her tight.

“It went well then?” Dad asked

“Pfft course, by they way, can we keep her forever?” I asked pouting.

“Family of Alex Haner.” A white hair doctor spoke.

We all turned, this was it, three weeks and four days later we would finally get answers. Answers I wasn’t so sure I wanted anymore.

“Well the good news is there is no sign of damage, the bad news is, Alex seems to have be dependent on liquid ecstasy and pain killers, all drugs seem to be out of his system due to the three week detox, but he will have to speak to someone about why he took these drugs. Now he is ask after a Miss Autumn Sanders? If she is here she is free to speak with him, but please be quick he needs his rest.”

I looked to my dad for comfort only to be grinned at. Well that was helpful.

“I can’t you guys should go in you basically stayed here.” I muttered

“Sanders, get your ass in there now, before I drag it in.” Brian smirked

I rolled my eyes and shakily put on foot in front of another, I pushed open the door and seen Alex, sitting upright and smiling.

“Your actually here.” He grinned

“On game day too.” I giggled

“Well I’ll be, they got her off the bus before a big Angels game.” He croaked

“They got uncle Zacky off too.” I spoke and rolled my eyes.

We really weren’t that bad.

“Baby, I’m so sorry, I never meant for any of this to happen, really, I hate the fact that all that stuff made me hit you made me treat you like crap, you were… no you ARE my whole world and I messed up, BIG time. I just wish I could re do this all over, I would in a heart beat.” He sighed getting angry with himself.

“It’s okay, I realised when I found you in the bathroom that none of it was you. I just wish we could go back, but we can’t. We have to move on. Just concentrate on getting better. Okay? We’ll talk when we go back home. I’m gonna send the guys in and see if I can talk Val into letting me call my brother.” I smiled squeezing his hand tight.

“They told you about Maddock?” He asked

“Yea, they did, I can’t wait to meet him, plus Val and Dad are… well they’re gonna’ give things another shot, see how it goes you know.” I grinned

“He’ll love you, trust me, and I’m happy for them, your okay with it tho… so soon after you know.” He his voice got lower when he said ‘you know’

“Yeah, I’m fine, those two are made for each other, and lets face it I’d much rather have Val as my mom anyway.” I grinned making my way back to the door

“See you soon babe.” He laughed

“Just get better Gates I don’t wanna have to replace a band member.” I teased

“Hey does it even matter, we swap that much anyways.” He stuck his tongue out.

“Going to get Aunt Mich and Bri.” I rolled my eyes.

I pushed the door open and smiled. They rushed past me and into the room, all six, except Zacky.

“Wanna go back and catch the game? I already asked Bri and he says we’re aloud to skip.” He asked

Did I?

“Hella’ yesh.” I grinned running out in front of him.

Uncle Zacky ran behind me, trying to keep up, and lets just say poor uncle Zacky couldn’t keep up. I stopped now breaking in to short pants trying to regain my breath or even sweating.

“How the hell..” Uncle Zacky wheezed obviously short of breath.

“I ran with pumpkin every morning, and I run on my own a lot and I really don’t know.” I laughed amused

“But you smoke!” Uncle Zacky exclaimed.

“Yesss, but I run so I can keep fit.” I counter argued

“Come on game is starting soon.” He grumbled pulling me to the car

We arrived back at the bus parked at the back of a hotel. I switched on the TV and grabbed any available snacks for the game.

“So how do you feel about Maddock.” He asked unsure of my response

“No need to be cautious Zacky V, honestly I’m jealous as heck, he has Val as his mom! But other than that I can’t wait to meet him, I’m really pleased to have a sibling, but I don’t get why dad didn’t tell me or why he never visited Maddock.” I spoke puzzled by the brother I never knew about.

“Your dad has his reasons, so what do you think another title this year? He said clearly changing the subject.

“I don’t know I think we stand a good chance, we have wood in the infield and hunter outfield, lets face it we have stokes as a pitcher so it might happen.” I smiled flopping onto the black leather sofa that the bus held as some sort of comfort.

I threw uncle Zacky, the bag of chips and kept the peanut butter cups for myself. We had settled down for the evening, we had baseball and junk food, perfection! I however seemed to have forgotten about the lack of sleep I was getting and after the first run, I think I fell asleep.

When I finally woke up I was being carried off the bus and back on to our street. I looked up to see my dad looking forward grinning from ear to ear. I couldn’t remember much else because, before I knew I was being woken up, by someone licking my face.

My eyes automatically snapped open and I was faced with a much bigger pumpkin.

“BABY” I squealed and in response I earned a loud bark.

“Oh, look at you, your not a little boy anymore, your so big and really hairy, I am going to go and get your pwetty fur all shaved so you’re a heck of a lot cooler.” I muttered to the dog as if it was a real person.

I pushed Pumpkin, making him jump off the bed. I ran to the shower quickly hopping in and letting the steaming hot water wash away any trace of dirt or stress. I was home. I wrapped the green towel around my body tightly. I padded back to my room, when a knock came to my door.

“Hun, it’s only me, I just want to tell you, since your up get dressed you dad is leaving Pumpkin off at the groomers and we are heading to the beach.” Val’s voice floated through the door.

“Thanks Val.” I called back as cheerfully as I could for only being up.

I pulled on my colourful bikini and then slid my Ipod, speakers and lighter into my new beach bag.

When we got to the beach everyone stood there including, someone I didn’t know, but when I heard Val squeal and take off toward the new figure I guessed straight away it was Maddock.

I was nervous no doubt about that. I wanted a brother in my life and I’d be damned if I let him slip out of my grasp!