I'm the Kind of Human Wreckage That You Love

I left the building and starred blankly at the street in front of me. I didn’t just do what I think I did, right?

Cha was leaning against her car, smoking but she quickly dropped the cigarette and crossed the road.
“Are you okay?” she asked, squeezing my shoulder. I nodded.

“Do you want me to drive you back to Huntington?”

I shook my head, “No, just go to the show, I’ll walk back home…” I whispered and then started to move one foot in front of the other.

“Hahaha! Very funny! You can’t even walk straight, there’s no way in hell or in heaven that I’m going to let you walk back to Huntington! I am supposed to meet some of my other friends at the bar, and you are coming with me!” she stated as she wrapped her arm around my shoulder and we started walking in Los Angeles. We shared a pizza and looked at the CDs in a music store and soon it was time for us to go to the show.

“Girls!” squealed Cha as she started jumping up and down, waving her hands in the air to catch her friends’ attention.

“Hey Cha!” said a young girl, about her age. She had short blue hair, sticking in all directions and she was running towards us, dragging an other girl with her. She had long blond hair with pink extensions and was wearing sunglasses. That’s the only things I could see.

“Girls, this is Adeline. Adeline, meet Ash, Jess.”

“Hey!” said the one with blue hair as she extended her hand, smiling brightly. I smiled back and shook her hand. “I’m Ashley but you can call me Ash!”

“Hi!” said the other girl, who I supposed was Jess. She shook my hand, “I’m Jessica, but call me Jess.”
“So girls, let’s get inside!” said Ash as she grabbed my wrist and dragged me inside. We managed to stand in front of the stage. Jess handed me a beer and the lights went out. Five men walked on stage and for a brief moment I thought it was Avenged Sevenfold…

They started off with a song called Little Things and it was like love at first sight. I fell in love with their music, just like I did with Green Day…

I was jumping up and down, banging my head and being careful not to spill my beer. At that moment, I was truly happy. All thoughts of my brother and Brian were thrown to the back of my mind. I didn’t have to worry about school, about my parents, about Brian and where he was… I was free. I was with people that liked me for who I was and weren’t trying to change me. I was enjoying every single moment of their performance.

“Are you okay?” asked Cha, swinging her arm over my shoulder. I nodded a big smile on my face.

“Thank you for letting me come with you and your friends!” I said, loud enough so she would hear me over the music. She smiled.

“No problem!”

She let go of me and headed back to the bar. I was underage but no one had been asking for I.D… Not that I mind.

After the show, Ash insisted to meet the band. So we managed to get backstage, beer in hands and our biggest smile on our face. I was a bit unsure, I had never hung around with girls before, except for Val because she was like family, I was always with Brian, Johnny or one of the guys. I ran a hand through my hair and took a swig of my beer. Just enjoy your night, Matt and Brian are in the past now… I kept repeating in my head.

“Hey girls! How was the show?” asked a boy I recognize as the singer.

“Awesome! You rock!” said Ash, feeling completely comfortable as she took a sit next between him and his twin brother as I just starred in awe.

“Come on Adeline, don’t be shy!” whispered Cha as she went to sit on the other couch. I reacted quickly and sat on the armchair. I tried my best to act cool you know, I didn’t wanted to look like the poor girl who just tagged along with her older friends. Matt, Brian, Zacky and Jimmy were soon to be 20 when I was soon to be 18. Cha, Ash and Jess were 19. I swung my legs over the armrest and took small swigs from my beer.

“So, where are you from?” asked the guitarist. He had blue eyes and blond hair, obviously dyed.

“Huntington Beach.” Cha said from her spot on the couch. And they all started talking amongst themselves. Nothing I wasn’t used to. I would often sit on Brian’s lap and listen to their conversations, without taking part in it.

“What’s your name?” asked the blue-eyed boy. I blinked and focussed my attention on him.

“Adeline. You?”

“Billy…” he said with a smile. I smiled back. “So, what did you think about the show?” he asked.

“It was great! It was my first real show actually…” I said truthfully, I wasn’t thinking about the countless times I had watch Avenged Sevenfold performs in my parents’ garage.

“Really? That’s cool! How old are you?”

“I’ll be 18 in September and you?” I said without thinking as I took a swig of my beer and nearly choked.

“I’m 20. Underage huh?” he said, a small smile on his face. I blushed and looked down at my hands. He was the first guy, besides Brian, who had ever made me blush…

“Billy! Stop bothering the poor girl!” said the singer. Billy laughed.

“Well guys, we should head back home. It was nice meeting you and everything.” Said Cha as she got up. Jess, Ash and I followed her move. They hugged the guys and I felt myself trapped in Billy’s arms as he hugged me.

“Hope to see you soon!” he said before he turned to hug Ash.

We all headed back to Cha’s car. I sat in the backseat, my head resting against the cold glass as Cha started the engine.

“So Adeline, you never told us, how you met our wonderful Cha?” asked Ash from the passenger seat.

“I was trying to walk to Los Angeles because I had some things that needed to be sorted and Cha offered me a ride. Then when the things I had to sort out didn’t ended as they were planned, she offered me to come with her to the show and I don’t regret it! Thank you again Cha!”

“No problem girl!” she replied waving her hand off.

“You know, I hope you’re not planning to go back to your normal life now. You’ll have to show us where you live so we can hang together!” said Jess. “Or Ash will probably stalk you…”

We started laughing and talking about nothing and everything. Soon we arrived in Huntington. Too soon if you ask me. The girls dropped me in front of my house and drove off, Ash and Jess waving at me and blowing me kisses.

I unlocked the door and threw my bag in the hall before locking the door behind me. I headed straight to my room. I didn’t ever bother to change into my PJs, I just lay on my bed, looking at the ceiling.
It amazed me how that day started off like the worst day ever and ended up as one of the best of my short life. I was lucky Cha had offered me a ride, thanks to her I met two awesome girls and an awesome band.

I put their CD in the player and laid back, crossing my hands behind my head.

I had learned so much about Cha, Jess and Ash in such a short amount of time, it was unbelievable. I knew that they were in a band, searching for an other guitarist and a singer. That they all lived in Cha’s parents’ house since they were always away. They dropped out of school. Ash loved the colour blue and had a thing for shinny things, coffee and energizing drinks, she was the drummer of their band. Jess was the quiet one, she liked the colour pink and neon colours. Her favourite band was Good Charlotte and she was the bassist in their band, Perfect Nightmare. Cha was like the big sister, always there for everyone else. She played guitar and her favourite band was Green Day. What I loved about those girls was that they treated me like I had known them for years! They didn’t care I was still in high school, they didn’t care I was younger…

On the other hand, the day hadn’t been so great. I had just become aware that Brian and I weren’t made for each other like I thought we were… It would take time for me to get over it, but eventually I would move on…

I skipped the songs until I reached The Click. I got up, opened my closets and threw all my clothes in the biggest suitcase I could find. There was no way I was going to stand behind and do as I was told. I wasn’t going to graduate. Fuck graduation! Once I was done with my clothes, I grabbed everything I could find in my room that could be useful and then moved to my parents’ bedroom. I opened the drawer and took some money, I knew they would notice but I couldn’t care less. I gathered all the bags in the hallway and then grabbed a piece of paper and a pen.

Mum, Dad
When you’ll read this I’ll be long gone. I won’t tell you where to exactly, just know that it’s a better place than here. I will not wait until graduation. There’s no point in wasting time like this. It has nothing to do with you, I love you and always will no matter where I will be. I’ll just ask you for one thing: forget I even existed…
Love you loads.Your daughter, Adeline.

I put the note on the counter, grabbed my bags and guitar and left the house in the middle of the night. I walked down the few blocks that were separating me from Cha’s house. She had given me her address on a piece of paper. When I reached her house, the lights were still on. I knocked on the door and waited for someone to open it.

“Adeline? It's near midnight, what are you doing here?” asked Cha, a worried look on her face.

“I’m your new guitarist.”