A Simple Solution

After reading "A Modest Proposal" (a satirical essay by Jonathan Swift) in English class, my teacher assigned a creative essay to us, where we were to pick an issue and come up with a bizarre absurd solution for it. This is what I came up with.

(For example, in "A Modest Proposal", Swift proposes to end poverty and hunger in Ireland by telling people to sell their babies and eat them...something like that.)

So this is a SATIRE. Please don't get offended, it isn't meant to be taken seriously, and if you know you're going to, please don't read it. I just made it for an assignment.