Battling the Loss You Live For.

I collapsed in a heap on my seat, the tears still streaming as I fiddled with my bag, switching off my mobile before throwing my bag to the floor, and buckling my seat belt. An airhostess walked by with a tray of what looked like… white lumpy crap that was steaming. She had a worried expression on her face.
“A-Are you okay, miss?” she asked warily, leaning over the empty seat next to me to ask. I shook my head.
“I’ll be fine, thank you,” I stuttered, wiping at my face with the back of my hand. She sighed, and pulled a white lump from her tray. It was steaming.
“Here, use this,” she said politely. It was a hot face towel, and it really worked. It didn’t make me feel like a machine anymore, anyways.
After I handed her back the towel - which had turned cold a few seconds after contact with my hand - I smiled a wobbly smile at her, not finding the words to say thanks. She smiled back at me, getting up and tending to the other passengers.

During the flight, Alexei, the airhostess, had pretty much taken care of me - she was literally a shoulder to cry on. Her and the guy sitting beside me, Josh, had listened to my useless babble about Frank, and how much I’d already missed him. I told them our story - how we met, to why we… had to leave one another. I kept hysterically crying all the time. So much, that Josh’s chequered red and black shirt was soaked with my salty tears.
I bet he thought I was a right weirdo.
Alexei seemed to understand; I’d actually brought her to tears a few times. They were lovely people. We exchanged numbers, and we weren’t ridiculously older than one another; Josh was 18 and Alexei was 19.

“So, what are you going to tell your Mom?” Josh asked, sipping on a Pepsi Max. I shrugged.
“The truth, I suppose. I’ll just leave out that we’re together,”
“So, you’re still together, then?” Alexei asked her left arm slung across our chairs. She was standing on the side of the isle. I nodded hesitantly. They noticed.
“What? What’re you thinking?” Alexei asked, leaning in slightly. She was very interested.
“I… Well, Frank’s not exactly Jersey’s most hated…” I started, but not sure what else to say to elaborate.
“As in…?” she beckoned on, quite eager to hear my views and thoughts. Don’t get me wrong, she wasn’t nosey, she was just very interested. Josh understood - he sat back in his chair, waiting for Alexei to get it.
“As in… he’s not… unpopular there. Especially with… girls…” I clarified, picking at a stray thread at the rip at the knee on my yellow skinnies.
“Oh…” she mumbled, leaning back into her straight posture.
“Hang on… This Frank your talking about, is it Frank Iero?” Josh asked. His eyebrows were knitted together in a wondering expression. Josh was from Jersey, but a different part - Hoboken.
“Yeah… Do you know him?”
“I think the whole of Jersey knows him! He’s almost fucking famous. He was really in the music scene. Then there was shit flying around that he moved out of Jersey… guess it’s true, then…” he explained, kind of trailing off.
“But, fuck… he’s back… And I’m leaving!” he groaned, shaking his head.
“He was really in the music scene…?” I mumbled Josh’s words out loud again, confused. Frank never mentioned a band.
“Yeah. He had a few bands that played some gigs at pubs and clubs and shit like that. He kicked ass. People said he was one of the best guitar players in Jersey. His bands used to put on one hell of a gig,” he explained, rubbing his forehead. I smiled at this - I knew Frank was an amazing guitar player, but the fact that people said stuff like that about his skills made me feel proud of him.

When I walked through the arrivals door, there were numerous people standing there, looking for their friends or family. Knowing I didn’t need to look for anyone, I walked through, tugging my suitcase along on its wheels behind me.
“Sazzy!” I whipped my head around, looking for whoever called my name. My name wasn’t exactly common, so it must’ve been for me.
But no-one knows my flight details…
I thought to myself, walking towards the taxi bay.
“Sydney, Katie! Hurry up! I’m gonna loose her!”
Sydney and Katie…?
I suddenly felt a pair of arms wrapped tightly around me from behind, catching a glimpse of dirty blonde hair.
“We missed you.”
“Charley!”
“The one and only,” he said into my ear, hugging me even closer to him.
“How comes you’re here?” I asked his arms still locked around me.
“I called Frank. He was… he told me what happened.”
At Charley’s explanation, my eyes began to sting again, my body going stiff. He loosened his arms, enough for me to turn around and bury my head into his chest.
“Hey, it’s okay,” he soothed, rubbing my back as I cried into him.
“Let’s get you home.”