Battling the Loss You Live For.

At 11:30, I was showered and dressed in a pair of dark blue skinny jeans, and a plain black long-sleeved top. I wore a grey hoodie with my faux leather jacket on top, my cigarettes well hidden in the inside pocket. She could never know I smoke. Sydney and Katie, as Frank had promised, came with me.
“So,” my Mother stated, eyeing us. She knew bad news was coming. “What are you all standing around for? Spit it out,” she complained, stirring her chicken curry. She was always bloody cooking.
“Well… Um… Frank stayed in Jersey. With Linda,” I said, wary of her reaction.
“…What? They stayed? In Jersey?!” she said, shock etched into her features. I nodded lamely. Her eyes focused on her curry.
“…What’s going to happen with the house?” she was a smart-ass.
“Well… Linda put me down as third owner,” I held my breath.
“She did what?!”
I backed away, Sydney smirking a little, but covering it by sipping on her water.
“So… you’re moving in there?!” Mum cried, abandoning her cooking to lean on the counter-top. I nodded lamely. Again. I was going to get slaughtered. The knife rack was right next to her hand…
She sighed heavily.
“I suppose I can’t stop you,” she mumbled. I was quiet for a while. Was that an acceptance?!
“…What?” I uttered, extremely shocked. She went back to her cooking.
“You’re old enough. And, you’re never bloody here, anyways. And, if you trash the house, it’s your own fault if Linda cuts your head off and dumps it in the sea,” she said, eyes set on her chicken. I didn’t know what to say. I saw her smirk.
“What?” I asked, quite confused. Then it dawned on me.
“You knew!”
“Of course I bloody did. Shine is my daughter, don’t forget. Your sister. And Katie is my grand-daughter. I’d bloody know if Katie was going anywhere,” she said smartly, not looking at me. I didn’t know what to say.
“Go on! Get packing,” she cried, shooing us out of the kitchen. Still dumbstruck, I followed a giggling Katie and Sydney up the two flights of stairs to my room, and they grabbed my two big duffel bags, shoving what was left of my clothes in them. I had most of my clothes at the house anyways, because I took most my clothes to New Jersey. I picked up my other spare suitcase from under my bed, and grabbing stuff like CD’s and my stereo. It didn’t take us long - I don’t have much stuff.
So, half an hour later, we all trudged downstairs with the two duffel bags and the suitcase filled with my crap. My Mum came out of the kitchen, a proud smile on her face. I think she finished cooking her chicken… without it burning.
“Right… Sazzy… You will be good on your own, won’t you?”
“Mum…” I whined.
“What?! You bloody kids now-a-days. Always whining,”
“I’m not disappearing off the face of the earth,” I mumbled, just wanting this to be over and done with. She rolled her eyes.
“Alright, then. Give me a hug,” she commanded, and I obliged, dropping my case and giving her a huge hug. She kissed me on the forehead, her eyes welling. I picked up my case quickly, opening the door.
“Bye, Mum,” I called, walking out the door with Sydney and Katie in tow.

We caught the bus to the house, looking like right retards carrying all the bags. As soon as we got in the house, I dumped the case at the foot of the stairs, going out the front door again for a cigarette.
“You’re really into all that nicotine, aren’t you?” I turned around, seeing Katie with her own set of keys in her hand, tucking them into her pocket.
“I always had a soft spot for it,” I mumbled, not wanting to have this conversation.
“Hey, I know. I’ve heard. I just… Didn’t see it coming,” she said, tapping down the few stairs towards me. I nodded.
“Neither did I, really,” I confessed, exhaling smoke. It felt so good.
“Just… try not to smoke too much… you already stink of it,” she said, chuckling.
“Anyways, want anything? I’m going to the newsagents,” she explained, pulling the hood of her pastel blue hoodie over her head. I shook my head.
“I’m good, thanks,” I replied, finishing my cancer stick. She nodded, walking up the slight hill.
I walked up the three stairs, letting myself into the house that I now had to call my own.
“Sazzy? Come and un-pack!” I heard Sydney yell from upstairs. I sighed, climbing the stairs, being faced withFrank’s my bedroom door. I turned my head to the side, seeing Sydney in what used to be the guest room. It made sense, really. It was the biggest, and her and Katie had insisted that they share, leaving Charley with Linda’s old room, and me with Frank’s. Katie and Sydney’s room was the only one with two beds, anyways.
Sighing, I walked into Frank’s room, suddenly hit with his aroma.
How the hell was I going to do this?